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agrauch
Mar 30, 2002, 8:30 AM
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Getting up at 2 AM is usual...
An 8 mile aproach doesn't scare you...
A 9.4mm rope is fat...
You find the need the need to explain your small set of nuts to aid climbers...
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redox
Mar 30, 2002, 8:37 AM
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a power bar and drink of frozen cool-aid is breakfast... all that at midnight.
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apollodorus
Mar 30, 2002, 8:50 AM
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Little flashes of lightning discharge surround you in an otherwise harmless fog cloud.
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estebandb
Mar 30, 2002, 3:48 PM
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if you own a $50 siut and a $1000 Gore-Tex suit
if you see a girl down the street and think "Hmmm, she is a TD+/5.11c
if you climb up the stairs....literaly
if you don't remember the last time you walked down the stairs.....you rappel
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beyond_gravity
Mar 30, 2002, 4:03 PM
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you dont sleep on the "pillow"
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compclimber
Mar 30, 2002, 4:08 PM
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You've ever quoted Mark Twight
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beyond_gravity
Mar 30, 2002, 6:24 PM
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your girl friend get mad when you talk about your incountors with the "Depth (w)hore"
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redox
Mar 30, 2002, 7:45 PM
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bg, what the hell are you talking about?
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goktug
Mar 30, 2002, 8:34 PM
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You start to feel your frozen fingers.
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polarwid
Mar 30, 2002, 8:47 PM
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...you ASK the military to SEND you to Alaska instead of fighting the orders...
...you sleep with the windows open all winter...
...when you are at Home Depot and a mention of POSTHOLING does not make you think of a FENCE...
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jmlangford
Mar 30, 2002, 10:01 PM
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When it is so cold that the water in your Camelback freezes solid...When you get back to camp and swim in a lake with ice around the edges and that is the WARMEST you've been all day...And to concur with the lightning comment above-when the lightning is so close that you hear the thunder BEFORE you see the flash!
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rrrADAM
Mar 30, 2002, 10:12 PM
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You're cold and wet.
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beyond_gravity
Mar 30, 2002, 10:52 PM
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redox, depth hore is a layer in the snowpack.
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peruviansunshine
Mar 31, 2002, 8:12 PM
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-When your climbin and your partners' eye brows are frozen solid and all you can muster to say is "Are you having fun yet"
-While retreating off multipitch madness in white out conditions and you hear you partner vagely say off belay and you know its your turn. you know the winds goin to spank you. While you reflect upon the situation:the frozen gloves, neck gatier, runners,and then you actually realize that you love it all the crazyinees somehow seems like a bizzar peace
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rockjock04
Mar 31, 2002, 9:31 PM
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When you start another, "you know you got it bad when" topic.
When you find your self hugging the wrong woman in bed because you accidentally went to the wrong house again because you are so tired. (does that work? I saw it on a commercial only with a computer guy.)
I got nothin
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bradhill
Apr 1, 2002, 6:43 PM
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You carry four foot long wands.
You wear your boots to the store when buying a pack.
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estebandb
Apr 1, 2002, 8:02 PM
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your friends don't invite you over anymore cuz they are tired of u climbing up the chimney
your friends don't invite you over anymore cuz they are tired of u climbing in their roof
your list of ascents is ten times longer than ur list of friends
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graniteboy
Apr 7, 2002, 8:12 PM
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When you live in a yurt (or your car) all winter long so you can buy gear.
When you have the scars the mountains gave you, and you consider them gifts.
When you can open a beer bottle with your teeth, then you drink the beer and chew the bottle up.
When you don't own any "hiking boots".
When you've had to eat insects to stay alive.
When you've boiled your sox in the cooking pot after 3 weeks in the range, and you still feel good about eating out of the pot, because it added more protein to your diet.
When you can shut up and lead without whining.
When Mark Twight Quotes YOU.
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beyond_gravity
Apr 7, 2002, 11:20 PM
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Your gear melts into a crevasse (I learned that I have to probe the hard way)
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crazywacky
Apr 7, 2002, 11:45 PM
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When you partner says his feet feel like blocks of wood....and you say "That's a good sign" with a grin on your face.
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climber1
Apr 16, 2002, 7:39 PM
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when you actually enjoy alpine starts.
when you don't think you smell as bad as you do. when you enjoy twelve hour (or longer) days
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badger
Jun 10, 2002, 4:48 AM
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When you worry if you are eating enough calories...
You wear climbing clothes to work...
You drive with your hand out the window in the winter until it's comfortably numb...
You've gone into the grocery store with your climbing harness on...
You use your ice axe for household chores (gardening, cleaning, killing bugs)...
You cut the ice axe loops off of your kids' bookbags (since they all seem to have them)...
A Powergel sounds like a meal...
20 degrees sounds warm to you...
You know the difference between a crevice and a crevasse!
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biggernhell
Jun 10, 2002, 3:21 PM
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When your camel back never really thaws out.
When you hear your girlfriend say "I really hate that Twight guy.
When you start considering that three dollar Walmart emergency poncho as a bivy option.
When a two day climb really means forty eight hours on the route
When you name your first born Rienhold.
When you put your beer in the freezer so that it will keep your hands cold enough for you to enjoy drinking it.
If you've ever had to scrape the ice off of yor eye lids just to keep them working right.
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timpanogos
Jun 10, 2002, 4:00 PM
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When the sound of your own counting -
9 steps, 1 breath
7 steps, 2 breaths
5 steps, 3 breaths is like the song of the sirens driving you hopelessly on.
When you seriously consider buying a handicap toilet for that extra 4" of height for the 3 days after.
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ubangie
Jun 11, 2002, 11:06 PM
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When you use your piss bottle at home.
When your gear is held together by duct tape and luck.
When your bivy sack is your backpack pulled up over your sleeping bag.
When 45lbs ='s a huge pack (with rope)
When you go shopping and only buy Clif bars, PowerGel, and Freeze Dried Meals.
When you and your partner no longer talk, he just grunts at you and you know exactly what he's saying.
You put your PowerGel in your arm pits to warm it up because you want a hot lunch.
You put sunblock up your nose.
You hold you piss bottle tighter then your girlfriend when you sleep.
[ This Message was edited by: ubangie on 2002-06-11 16:42 ]
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apollodorus
Jun 11, 2002, 11:34 PM
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You go climbing with two Italians on Half Dome, and you use one 8.5mm rope for three people and two guys simul-climb to clean the pitch.
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jtcronk
Jun 28, 2002, 6:35 AM
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When you eat your freeze-dried with an ice tool pick.....I have a pic from last week if anyone is interested.....Either I'm obsessed with fast and light, or I forgot my spoon. Ok, probably both....
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indiesummit
Jul 2, 2002, 4:21 PM
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When you show up at the health club in plastic boots wearing a pack...
When you steal 45lb plates to put in said pack from angry monobrow and hope he can't find his way to the Stairmaster...
When the captain of the flight announces your altitude and you compare it the highest you've climbed...
When freezing your twig and berries becomes an "acceptable risk"...
When you get rid of your bed and seriously consider hanging a portaledge from your woodie...
When sexual fantasies involve a portaledge and sleeping bags that zip together!
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deblaunk
Jul 2, 2002, 6:22 PM
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-When you take off your shoes and are pleased that you have all your toes and they are only purple.
-When you sleep with your axe cause you are having withdrawal
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ubangie
Jul 3, 2002, 9:23 PM
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When you judge the quality of the trip on the amount of weight you loose... 10 lbs ok trip, 15 lbs good trip, 20 lbs great trip, 25 lbs + an epic!!!
When sport and trad climbing are off season training for the real thing.
If you have ever pulled a toe nail off with your leather man, because "it feels better once it's off".
Duct tape and super glue are a part of your first aid kit.
If you have ever mixed up your pee bottle and your water bottle in the middle of the night... mmmm warm and salty...
When every post you've made in this thread has a line about a pee bottle, and/or Mark Twight in it.
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pbjosh
Jul 3, 2002, 9:47 PM
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... when you are smart enough to no longer attempt to use a camelback. Come on, gimme a break, you don't use a camelback when it's that cold out!
... when you eat lunch at 7AM because it's a convenient time to stop to put on sunscreen and goggles and besides, you've been at it for 6 hours already.
... when whiteouts, wind, lightening that hasn't hit you yet, and marginal snow conditions are all deemed "not too bad" and you vote to keep going
... when you tug three times on the rope and then hope your partner doesn't fall because your picket lodged in packed powder behind a precariously perched boulder was the best you could do for an "anchor"
I like the one about shopping and only buying bars, gu and freeze dried meals, I've done that plenty of times. Also like the one about "2 days" meaning 48 hours of climbing.
And I have had a friend (very recently) show up at the crag and empty his piss bottle on the side of the road - he now carries one in the car rather than be bothered to stop and find a public restroom.
..josh
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interruptor
Jul 12, 2002, 4:23 PM
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Your desktop has a mountain photo.
"My computer" icon is a snowy mountain
"My documents" icon is a pair of boots
"My network places" is a climbing rope
"Recycable bin" icon is an ice axe
"Internet explorer" icon is a snow flake
etc...
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wildtrail
Jul 12, 2002, 8:07 PM
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When you get up in the morning and you swear you just laid down...
When everything you see is illuminated by your headlamp...
When your wife is yelling at you because the air conditioner wasn't necessary in November...
When the noise you hear isn't your partner placing a bolt, its your teeth chattering...
When you wait up late at night for the snow to stop falling just so you can run out and be the first to play in it...
When avalanche is more than just a Chevy...
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micahmcguire
Jul 12, 2002, 10:38 PM
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when you can eat stick of butter or unhydrated cream of wheat just for energy. and you know you're making the most of your climb when you actually enjoy doing so.
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bradhill
Jul 12, 2002, 11:42 PM
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Haha. Yeah! Gotta love the stick of butter rolled in brown sugar meal.
You know you're an alpine climber when your criteria for snack food is that it won't break your teeth at -30.
. . . when jumping off the opposite side of the ridge is your "belay".
. . . when the sound of cracking glacial ice lulls you to sleep.
. . . when you risk giardia because the iodine tablets are too heavy.
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bertdehouck
Jul 14, 2002, 11:59 AM
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...you live in a country where the highest point is 370 meter abouve sealevel (belgium,europe)...
...the only place you like in belgium is brussels zaventem (national airport)...
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beyond_gravity
Jul 14, 2002, 4:59 PM
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your Gore-Tex jacket is worth more then your Subaru
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highambitions
Aug 30, 2002, 3:34 AM
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....you have to take a bath with a frozen baby wipe.
....your head is always in the clouds.
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basecamp_junkie
Aug 30, 2002, 4:18 AM
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when you get home and tell your wife/girlfriend that it's normal, the peeling will only last a few days. on the same note, you've used this excuse for having frozen your ears more than once.
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jmlangford
Aug 30, 2002, 4:36 AM
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You piss when you get up in the morning and it turns to snow before it hits the ground. Kinda like the snowmakers at the ski resorts.
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mainline
Aug 30, 2002, 6:33 AM
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You wear your crampons and ice tools at the local rock crag.
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kricir
Oct 15, 2005, 9:39 AM
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- when you look and feel the same after a climb as you would a nite of heavy drinking.
- when you dive head first down a steep snow slope, self arresting right at the botttom, just to scare the crap out of the hikers below :twisted:
- if you'v ever made an " alpine grass salad" for a snack.
- you have extreme difficulty explaning to your friends what you do on weekends
- If you tie your own quickdraws.
- If you go sport climbing in mountain boots
- if you toe nails have ever turned black and fallen off
P.S. I have fortunately had all of these experences.
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altelis
Oct 15, 2005, 1:41 PM
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....when you can't mix up your pee bottle with your water bottle.....b/c they are the SAME bottle :oops:
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drake
Oct 17, 2005, 2:38 PM
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...when you can't find any partners for the "alpine" routes you want to attempt. :( (easy to find peole for the easy to moderate stuff).
...when the "alpine" routes you attempt require 3 to 4 points of contact instead of, mostly, just 2 to 3.
...when you don't use the term "alpine route" or "alpine climb" too freely, as seems to be the case these days. Many mountaineering routes are often refered to as alpine routes.
I find the 48oz nalgene cantene (wide mouth) to be half the weight of a 32oz nalgene bottle, to be more compact when packed, holds more pee and is not as easily confused with water bottles.
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trenchdigger
Oct 17, 2005, 2:46 PM
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...your nuts grow rather than shrivel when exposed to extreme cold. :shock:
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anykineclimb
Oct 20, 2005, 9:15 PM
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You know the names of more famous alpinists than presidents
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restwhenyoudie
Oct 20, 2005, 9:31 PM
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you constantly tell your friends "it doesn't have to be fun, to be fun"
Chris
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poorboy
Oct 20, 2005, 9:52 PM
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Your motto when you take your girlfriend climbing is "If she's not crying, she's not trying"
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restwhenyoudie
Oct 21, 2005, 3:02 AM
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1. When you wake up in the middle of the night, at home, to pee you bend down to strap your crampons on.
2. Your crampons are there.
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eac
Oct 21, 2005, 4:29 AM
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In reply to: ... I find the 48oz nalgene cantene (wide mouth) to be half the weight of a 32oz nalgene bottle, to be more compact when packed, holds more pee and is not as easily confused with water bottles.
when you agree about the benefits of the nalgene canteen, but know it's really difficult to close them one-handed while using a "peeing device" (are there any other women on this thread?)
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guanoboy
Oct 21, 2005, 5:18 AM
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when you prefer hiking to climbing. Come on now, you know its true - alpine routes always have a hiking to climbing ratio of greater than one.
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pipsqueekspire
Oct 21, 2005, 6:01 AM
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You know you're an alpine climber when...
...you pray for a bowel movement at 2AM!
...you convince your partner to leave the sticky rubber in the car.
...you know how to ski in leather boots
...you play with your beacons at the beach
...your repair kit includes a file.
...you have holes in the inside calf area of every pair of pants you own.
...have tufts of core popping out of your rope about 4 feet from the ends.
..."that looks do-able" comes out of your mouth every time you pass a peak.
...you wife doesnt want to come on any more 'climbs' with you.
...being up for 24hours is easy
...you pick your partners based on a pulse and ability to belay
...you have used 151 rum to clean a wound or start a fire!
...the "ice season" for you is late fall
...you carry a bent coat hanger, know what it's for and you have used it.
...scary talus is bigger than a softball and smaller than a basketball
...you cant remember the real color of your boots.
...you cant see any part of your original helmet.
...your sunglasses cost more than your rack
...you tell everyone you'll be home somtime between "Tuesday and next Monday"
...you know how to play cards in Russian, Spanish and Nepalese.
...you can recall the number of seams in your tent and have estimated the number of stitches per foot of seam
...you have calculated the risk of pooping your pants vs going outside
...have had to wash your down bag with bleach and detergent and said screw the care label.
...wiping your butt with snow is the best option
...you are covered head to toe in a scientific layering system yet you wear thin fuzzy wool gloves
...you pray your partner doesnt fall because your are no longer sure if you can close your fingers around a rope.
that was fun!
-pip
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mcmg
Oct 21, 2005, 9:53 PM
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...you've thrown more snowballs with your crampons then with your hands
...you use the word memorable instead of enjoyable to descripe your climbs
...the most accurate word to describe your last trip is 'epic'
...somebody asks you for a straw and you pull out an ice screw
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