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enitine
May 28, 2003, 2:31 PM
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I know this probably isnt related to climbing all that much, but do any of you have g/f's who dont really like the outdoors, like climbing for an example? I do alot of extreme activities outdoors and climbing is one of them. I'm tired of her bitching because I don't take her to the gym or climb with my friends outside, have any suggestions that could make her first time decent so she would want to come out with me more often? :roll: :shock:
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vertical_reality
May 28, 2003, 2:43 PM
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Of course you could always make the experience miserable for her, then she'd never ask to go again. :lol:
Tell her to bring a discman or something for music if she gets bored. Maybe a camera if she likes to take pictures... and I don't mean to take pics of you guys climbing. If she doesn't like to be outdoors, pick a place with an easy/short approach. Ask her if she wants to try climbing. Maybe teach her how to belay so that she feels like she's part of the group... and most importantly, pay more attention to her then your buddies!
Try and show her why you like the outdoors so much, maybe she'll have a change of heart.
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wigglestick
May 28, 2003, 2:46 PM
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My advice to you would be:
1. Dump her.
2. Don't ever use the phrase "extreme activities" again.
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jaylaka
May 28, 2003, 2:46 PM
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well, through trial and error, i've decided to NOT get involved with a guy who doesn't have the interest or the inclination to join me with my running and/or climbing.
yeah, so that's not too helpful.
um, how about this. make sure it's a nice day (not too hot or buggy) and just make a day of it. (no camping to start with!) climb a little, hike around a little, bring a picnic. show her how nice the outdoors can be.
if she likes it, cool. if not, well, you've got a problem. :?
(and i'm not clear, does she WANT to come or are you just trying to get her into the great outdoors?)
jen
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enitine
May 28, 2003, 2:59 PM
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First off "Extreme shit" how's that sound??!?
2nd, Jen are you hot cause i'll sure as hell come to wisconsin and climb with ya... :wink: She's not the one to do outdoor activities, but is bugging me to take her to the gym and or on the real stuff :D . So with that I was just looking for suggestions on how she could have a half decent time climbing with my buddies and I?!? 8)
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bandycoot
May 28, 2003, 3:01 PM
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My wife is my best climbing partner now. I started teaching her when I met her 10 months ago, and now she is leading up to 10a trad and following whatever I can lead. We go out climbing every weekend and push ourselves together. It's GREAT!!! Sounds like your gf wants to be part of your outdoor life if she is
In reply to: bitching because I don't take her to the gym or climb with my friends outside
I think that the questions you should really be asking is why don't you want her with you and why are you referring to her as a bitch?
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biff
May 28, 2003, 3:02 PM
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In reply to: My advice to you would be: 1. Dump her. 2. Don't ever use the phrase "extreme activities" again.
Ha, that is good advice.
What about the term adventure sports?
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bumblie
May 28, 2003, 3:06 PM
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Trial by Fire.
Take her to Seneca for the weekend.
or
Take her to your gym.
Go when it's not crowded and get one or two friends to join you.
Keep it low key.
Focus on her having fun, even if you don't get to climb much.
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rockmx
May 28, 2003, 3:07 PM
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In reply to: 2. Don't ever use the phrase "extreme activities" again |
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enitine
May 28, 2003, 3:07 PM
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Been with her 5 years, not a bitch, just a phrase... :shock:
She sees all the "Adventure Sports" that I do and I THINK
she just wants to give them a try so it looks like she cares.
I never brought her out with me climbing b/f cause there is tension
between my my friends and her, but things are a little resolved. I guess
I should lighten up on the subject and just see how her first day of climbing goes tonight... :roll:
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pisceian
May 28, 2003, 3:08 PM
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It sounds like she wants to join you and be a part of your life, so take her! If she's willing to try new things and see what your "extreme" life is all about then it'll be worth a shot. I don't think you'd have to do anything really special, because then she might expect that every time. Just take it slow and avoid her being afraid. Keep it fun, like everyone else said, and I bet things will work out.
However, if she doesn't even own a pair of sneakers and is afraid of breaking a nail then I would reconsider your relationship, but it doesn't sound like that's the case.
Good luck,
Pam
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reborne
May 28, 2003, 3:11 PM
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In reply to: My advice to you would be: 1. Dump her. 2. Don't ever use the phrase "extreme activities" again.
i dont know about dumping her but as far as number two goes i was glad someone said something caus DAM!
AND by the way "adventure sports" has gatta be worse than extreme sports I know you guys wanna differntiate yourselves from the golfers and weekend two hand tuch players but does it have to sound like an inner city outreach program .... hmmm inner city outreach program i should start one of those .... there goes the craggerhood or should it have been crackerhood
one last edit : Tell dan quarteze i said hi
im sorry im funny i dont care what anyone thinks
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enitine
May 28, 2003, 3:12 PM
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I think the word "extreme" has been taken to far... :x
This isnt a love saga, I was just asking for suggestions...which people have provided... :D Alright, I guess I've posted enuff about this stupid thread... :cry: Hopefully the night in the gym is a success, if not then o F#$King well... :?
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corpse
May 28, 2003, 3:13 PM
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he didn't refer to her as a bitch, just that she's bitching.. I'm not a bitch, but Iv'e done my fair share of bitching.
As a suggestion, take her climbing WITHOUT your friends! Focus on her.. Remember, she's a virgin, in this sense.. And with any virgin, you need to take your time and give your undivided attention. You wouldn't want your friends in the room the first time you lost your vriginity, would ya? Maybe the 2nd time, but not hte 1st. But really, ditch your friends for that day and show her a good time.. If anything else, she'll be glad you did and reciprocate in a way that'll make you quite happy. (At least thats what I understand, to me, lately, my love life is alot like bouldering :roll: )
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enitine
May 28, 2003, 3:17 PM
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I think I could gain a new climbing g/f outta this whole thread.....
Any takers??!?!
Taking applications via email... 8)
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jaylaka
May 28, 2003, 3:25 PM
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In reply to: First off "Extreme s___" how's that sound??!? 2nd, Jen are you hot cause i'll sure as hell come to wisconsin and climb with ya... :wink: She's not the one to do outdoor activities, but is bugging me to take her to the gym and or on the real stuff :D . So with that I was just looking for suggestions on how she could have a half decent time climbing with my buddies and I?!? 8)
all climber chicks are hot. you should know that. :wink:
so she wants to get involved. cool - that's the first step. take her climbing at the gym a couple of times WITHOUT your friends there. go when it's not crowded, make a date of it.
teach her how to belay, the commands, and all that. set her on an easy route, let her build some confidence. (if you have another guy friend whose gf either climbs or wants to, that could be awesome. kinda like a double date.)
then go outside. with a small group of friends on a nice day. friends that she likes and won't feel selfconscious in front of. make sure the route is do-able and she's comfortable.
and take it from there.
but i will warn you. one of the worst fights i had with a significant other when he (a very, very accomplished waterskier/wakeboarder) was trying to teach me to ski. be very, very patient but don't treat her like a child, supportive but not commanding.
and good luck! :D
jen
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mother_sheep
May 28, 2003, 3:26 PM
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Tell her to bring a friend.
:twisted: PERVERTS!!!! :twisted:
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bluelip
May 28, 2003, 3:29 PM
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In reply to: I think I could gain a new climbing g/f outta this whole thread..... Any takers??!?!
I'm doubting that there will be. BUT good luck anyhow. :lol:
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enitine
May 28, 2003, 3:30 PM
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Hmm...might dump her to go out with you Jen.... :wink: 8)
Thanx for the advice, will try to put it to some good use.
The funny thing about it is, there's gonna be 4 guys and her tonight... :shock: LOL..o well.. :roll:
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calfcramp
May 28, 2003, 3:52 PM
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I'm in a remarkably similar situation. But when you do go out, just try to act as normal as possible. Don't overdo the "supportive" thing. Comes off as being condescending(sp?). I made that mistake.
Tough choice between the "date" approach and the "bring some of her friends" approach. But I would guess that you would know best.
I know the feeling though: "She's great, if only she liked ______ as much as I do...."
Gets frustrating!!!!!!!!!!
Good luck man.
C
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drector
May 28, 2003, 4:01 PM
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In reply to: ...there is tension between my my friends and her, but things are a little resolved...
I suggest leaving the friends behind. Go out belaying her and don't expect to climb. Sit around and chat between her climbs. Make the expectations very low and do stuff that is easy yet interesting (steep with big holds).
My wife won't touch climbing. I just climb with other people. My 7 year old daughter likes it but she's a bit small to belay me :)
Dave
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enitine
May 28, 2003, 4:01 PM
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OMFG!!!!! WELL SAID!
That's exactly how I look at this whole experience that is about to unfold in the next few hours... :? Sometimes I think she is into doing things with me just to make it look like she cares, instead of enjoying it. Everytime I say "If you dont want to go then you dont have to" she gets ticked off thinking I dont want her to do nething.... :x Women are a pain in the azz... :evil: Still taking apps tho... :wink:
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jaylaka
May 28, 2003, 4:27 PM
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In reply to: OMFG!!!!! WELL SAID! That's exactly how I look at this whole experience that is about to unfold in the next few hours... :? Sometimes I think she is into doing things with me just to make it look like she cares, instead of enjoying it. Everytime I say "If you dont want to go then you dont have to" she gets ticked off thinking I dont want her to do nething.... :x Women are a pain in the azz... :evil: Still taking apps tho... :wink:
don't generalize it to women! i've had boyfriends do this to me too!!!
one would seem to be very supportive and encouraging my endeavors but then get pouty/needy right before and after. :roll:
another got pissed when i, my fourth or fifth time climbing, outclimbed him. :roll: he would also get jealous when i would climb with anyone other than him.
screw it. i no longer deal with head trips.
just road trips.
:D
jen
who is not hiring at this time but will keep you posted
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bandycoot
May 28, 2003, 4:28 PM
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If she has never been climbing but would like to try, the gym is definitely your best bet. There is no time spent making anchors while she hangs out bored at the bottom, and if the outdoors don't appeal to her a whole lot then that way she is experiencing the sport indoors. Good luck tonight!
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baldguy
May 28, 2003, 4:40 PM
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In reply to: Hmm...might dump her to go out with you Jen.... :wink: 8)
In reply to: Women are a pain in the azz... Still taking apps tho...
LOL!
Given the title of this thread and the above two quotes, I'm betting you won't be getting many "apps". Maybe you DO need to take wigglestick's advice and dump her. For her sake.
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