|
Toast_in_the_Machine
Feb 25, 2009, 11:48 AM
Post #76 of 91
(742 views)
Shortcut
Registered: Sep 12, 2008
Posts: 5208
|
Since the OP is obviosly a troll account, and since we know none of the regulars here would ever create a troll account, we can reach only one conclusion.
The account was created to test a regular poster as well as to see if he was like the rest of his climbing buddies.
As a very happily married man, I have lots of real advice. This thread, however, begs for my stock-in-trade sarcastic comments.
The advice is: Teach your GF how to troll on RC.com. Your wasting hours thinking up answers to inane questions will have you spending more time at home.
You can count posting time as climbing time.
A big win-win
|
|
|
|
|
Toast_in_the_Machine
Feb 25, 2009, 12:20 PM
Post #77 of 91
(737 views)
Shortcut
Registered: Sep 12, 2008
Posts: 5208
|
Real advice:
True happiness and success comes from spending your time and efforts on those items you have as your highest priorities.
If your #1 priority is your GF (not the relationship – her), then you should focus your time around being with her. If your #1 priority is climbing, then you should focus your time around climbing. There are lots of possibilities within a day, working, socializing, improving personal hygiene, video games, posting on the net, etc. Every second you spend doing something is a second you didn’t spend doing something else on your priority “list”.
Don’t be like a workaholic who claims their family is “the most important thing in my life” yet spends 60+ hours at work. That person is never happy. You must make sure that your energies are in line with your priorities.
Then discuss the priorities (not time, not people, not facts) with your GF. Listen to hers, talk of yours. If you can come to shared priorities then happiness will follow. If hers are distinctly in opposition with yours, then you should either split or plan on continuing conflict.
Two side notes: (1) Considering the workaholic is a profile for a corporate executive, do we even have to wonder why so many companies create so much unhappiness for their employees? (2) Deep emotional conversations about priorities are considered “foreplay” by at least half of the population.
|
|
|
|
|
shockabuku
Feb 25, 2009, 2:24 PM
Post #79 of 91
(709 views)
Shortcut
Registered: May 20, 2006
Posts: 4868
|
altelis wrote: Toast_in_the_Machine wrote: .... Deep emotional conversations about priorities are considered “foreplay” by at least half of the population. oh baby, i'm so HOT right now 
Damn, I thought you were a guy! 
Apparently my internet gender detection is in need of adjustment.
|
|
|
|
|
altelis
Feb 25, 2009, 2:34 PM
Post #80 of 91
(700 views)
Shortcut
Registered: Nov 10, 2004
Posts: 2168
|
I am a guy.
So the options are you are confused about which half the population TITM was talking about, I was confused about which half the population TITM was talking about, or thirdly, in the words of Splinter, "I made another funny!" (that apparently wasn't funny).
|
|
|
|
|
shockabuku
Feb 25, 2009, 2:37 PM
Post #81 of 91
(701 views)
Shortcut
Registered: May 20, 2006
Posts: 4868
|
Deep emotional conversations about priorities are considered “foreplay” by at least half of the population.
It's funny (ironic) how extreme mental duress bordering on physical pain often ends up leading to sex.
|
|
|
|
|
desertwanderer81
Feb 25, 2009, 2:39 PM
Post #82 of 91
(700 views)
Shortcut
Registered: Sep 5, 2007
Posts: 2272
|
Valarc wrote: drector wrote: I'll go insane and probably run off with the toaster. That toaster is a little slut. I even heard she likes to have both holes filled at once. What a whore!
I thought you were talking about Battlestar Galactica for a little there.....
|
|
|
|
|
desertwanderer81
Feb 25, 2009, 2:43 PM
Post #83 of 91
(692 views)
Shortcut
Registered: Sep 5, 2007
Posts: 2272
|
cuber wrote: Not even sure if I would get answers here or whether its appropriate to post here.. Started climbing about a year back in the gym and got hooked onto it doing 2/3 times a week. Planning to finally boulder outside in the coming days.. In the meanwhile fell in love with a woman-shes not into climbing-- but thats ok as I love her.. Fast forward- we are planning to get married... The only thorn seems she thinks I love climbing too much and thinks I should cut down on it. I was thinking of getting a finger board and boulder a few times a month outside, but am afraid I will lose touch. Has anyone been through a similar situation-- how the hell did you adjust...
Likelyhood of troll: 70%
Me though, I'd never date a girl who wasn't at least a bit outdoorsy. I think I could possibly live without climbing, but I'd want her to at least be interested in being outdoors with me.....because that's where I'm going to be on the weekends.
Plus there's something incredibly romantic about busting your ass all day hiking/climbing/whatever and then sleeping together with no one else around for miles.
|
|
|
|
|
altelis
Feb 25, 2009, 2:43 PM
Post #84 of 91
(692 views)
Shortcut
Registered: Nov 10, 2004
Posts: 2168
|
shockabuku wrote: Deep emotional conversations about priorities are considered “foreplay” by at least half of the population. I t's funny (ironic) how extreme mental duress bordering on physical pain often ends up leading to sex.
Yet another reason to try and get your partner (life) and your partner (climbing) to be the same person. 'Cause in my experience, that can be some GOOD sex!
|
|
|
|
|
clee03m
Feb 25, 2009, 6:19 PM
Post #85 of 91
(670 views)
Shortcut
Registered: Oct 29, 2004
Posts: 785
|
Toast_in_the_Machine wrote: Don’t be like a workaholic who claims their family is “the most important thing in my life” yet spends 60+ hours at work. That person is never happy. You must make sure that your energies are in line with your priorities.
I work 60+ hours a week. My husband is my number one priority. My happiness must be just a sad delusion.
|
|
|
|
|
Wunderkind
Feb 25, 2009, 6:48 PM
Post #86 of 91
(664 views)
Shortcut
Registered: Nov 7, 2008
Posts: 120
|
Lots of people (my wife included) work more than 60 hours but don't make work their priority - I think that being a workaholic is about more than hours.
For us, we got into climbing at her suggestion. Being a slightly obsessive personality, I've taken it a bit further than her, but she's still up for centering our vacations/days off/weekends around climbing and she's climbing pretty hard given her experience level (we're both still noobs I'm sure). So I've got that going for me. Thing is, when we got married, I was racing bicycles full time. I bought her a bike and she tried but it just wasn't her thing. I knew she'd be a keeper b/c she never suggested that I should ride my bike less, because she knew I loved doing it. It interfered with plenty, but she never asked me to stop. Of course I also tried to distinguish between what could and could not be sacrified in order to get in a ride.
Contrast that with the girl before her (not a wife) who wanted me to ride less and threatened to break up when I suggested that I was going to buy a motorcycle. There were a lot of things I liked about that girl, but life would have always been a struggle against my pursuits. I agree with people who are saying marriage is about compromise, and if I had ended up with the first girl I'm sure I would have compromised, but we'd both be less happy for it. The girl I married got the first ride on the new bike, btw.
|
|
|
|
|
camhead
Feb 25, 2009, 8:13 PM
Post #87 of 91
(649 views)
Shortcut
Registered: Sep 10, 2001
Posts: 20939
|
desertwanderer81 wrote: cuber wrote: Not even sure if I would get answers here or whether its appropriate to post here.. Started climbing about a year back in the gym and got hooked onto it doing 2/3 times a week. Planning to finally boulder outside in the coming days.. In the meanwhile fell in love with a woman-shes not into climbing-- but thats ok as I love her.. Fast forward- we are planning to get married... The only thorn seems she thinks I love climbing too much and thinks I should cut down on it. I was thinking of getting a finger board and boulder a few times a month outside, but am afraid I will lose touch. Has anyone been through a similar situation-- how the hell did you adjust... Likelyhood of troll: 70% Me though, I'd never date a girl who wasn't at least a bit outdoorsy. I think I could possibly live without climbing, but I'd want her to at least be interested in being outdoors with me.....because that's where I'm going to be on the weekends. Plus there's something incredibly romantic about busting your ass all day hiking/climbing/whatever and then sleeping together with no one else around for miles.
Dude, I think that if you call something as a troll, you cannot turn around and respond to it. That's wanting to have your cake and eat it too. Call it and mock it, or respond and get sucked in. If you do both it is just masturbation.
|
|
|
|
|
kachoong
Feb 25, 2009, 8:46 PM
Post #88 of 91
(637 views)
Shortcut
Registered: Jan 23, 2004
Posts: 15304
|
60 hours is certainly a lot of work hours, but as said hours worked per week is not an indicator of the quality time that a couple has remaining in the week to spend together.... nor does it reflect that someone prefers working over spending time with a SO. Whether you work 20 hours or 70 hours a week you can of course be happier with your marriage than you are with work, but you can also tailor your life to fit in climbing. I would think though that if you bring your work home or work from home it could be more difficult to draw the line of attention, but that's just me... I like to separate work from home.
Climbing will always mean something different to each and every person. How it affects your life really does depend on where you are at in life and how long you've been climbing. For me, I've experienced enough in my climbing history to know that it would never cause friction between my wife and I. I'm always hungry for more but these days, as I get older, I've wised up to realistically juggle my lifetime hobby with my life as a whole. Admittedly, both my wife and I climb, and it is through climbing that we found each other, but not all of our "spare" time involves climbing.
We like to organize our main vacation time by incorporating climbing but the main focus is experiencing the time together, whether we climb or not. Some people obsess and/or NEED to always have climbing... to immerse themselves. I know, coz that was me... for about the first ten years that I climbed.
Now I find myself thinking about climbing differently than when I was in my early 20's but in no way do I enjoy climbing any less or feel that I'm missing out, even if I get outside three times a year. I guess these days I just judge my life on all that I do and not just what I experience climbing. The main thing is that we satisfy our hunger for climbing but at the same time everything else that life has to offer, even if it means not packing the shoes and chalk bag.
|
|
|
|
|
IcemanVR6
Feb 26, 2009, 1:48 PM
Post #90 of 91
(572 views)
Shortcut
Registered: Feb 26, 2009
Posts: 2
|
The fact that this guy is asking for advice on a climbing forum says it all! He knows what the majority of people are going to say. He is looking for support for climbing.
Personally, if someone wasn't ok with climbing, I wouldn't date them. This is the safest of my activities. But I have no useful advice because I'm single. I'm waiting for the climbing/snowboarding/downhill longboarding chick. Yeah, I may be single awhile. ;)
|
|
|
|
|
charley
Feb 26, 2009, 2:09 PM
Post #91 of 91
(563 views)
Shortcut
Registered: Apr 13, 2002
Posts: 6627
|
I don't know exactly what the op is asking. I think he is asking about sharing his time with another.
I would say if you want to be selfish about your free time and you are not married DON'T get married.
I have been married for over forty years. I told my wife early that my weekends were mine. That happened maye 75% of the time. There is always a kids birthday party, a family reunion or something else that should be attended. I missed alot of them. I have been climbing for over 15 years and I climb most weekends for the seven months that are ok to climb here. I climb on sunday or make a short trip and climb both days. My wife works part of 3 out of 4 weekends. You have to decide what is important to you. What you are willing to give up and she has to decide the same. If you are pushed into things you don't want the relationship probably won't work.
At this point in my life I am not sure that marriage is worth the problems it brings. I am a selfish self centered bastard though.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
