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tradman
Aug 25, 2004, 2:31 PM
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Registered: Jan 14, 2003
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http://www.digitalface.co.uk/00183015.jpg
Found this little gem while surfing through a stock image library.
Okay, it's obvious that they're not really climbers, but what the hell were they thinking?!?!?
See if you can spot the deliberate mistakes!
:lol:
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the_pirate
Aug 25, 2004, 2:33 PM
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how the hell does a person manage to put a harness on backward?
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rockgoat
Aug 25, 2004, 2:40 PM
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I love seeing ads of fake climbers. They are just lil pretty boys looking good for the camera. :lol: :lol: Smile!
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maculated
Aug 25, 2004, 2:41 PM
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That is too good. Harness on backward. Hah.
I'd give them crap for the QD's, except maybe he just cleaned a route (albeit a short one) and used two as an anchor while he threaded his manly pink rope.
Though I wonder where he clipped them to anchor to. They are thinking, "Thank God ignorance protects us!"
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dingus
Aug 25, 2004, 2:44 PM
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I wonder what the pic was taken for? Commercial photography? If so...
If he had his harness on right then it would spoil the 'clean line' of his stomach and give him a big bulge at the crotch. The 'below the waist' angle of the photo presents this commercial photog the same dilemna climbing photogs face every day... how to take an interesting picture of a climber from below, without making their legs look like oak trees (impossible in my case), their crotch look like a camel toe (impossible in my case) or their ass look like the Goodyear Blimp (hehe IMPOSSIBLE in my case).
I bet they tried 50 or a hundred shots with the harness on correctly before saying 'fuck it' just put the damn thing on backwards...
Bet that's what happened. Looks like he didn't even bother buckling it up.
So, next time your pondering how to get the killer shot of your rope gun/babe climbing partner (who certainly doesn't want a camel toe near her crotch, or at least not a fake one), tell her to put her harness on backwards before sending her latest project. Not only will the camel toe go away, but her ass will look smaller too.
Cheers
DMT
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usmc_2tothetop
Aug 25, 2004, 2:44 PM
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Registered: Dec 18, 2002
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Jesus..........and is that a frayed rope?
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marcel
Aug 25, 2004, 3:02 PM
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The harness looks to be a DMM Alpine harness on of the easiest harness to put on right. :D
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une
Aug 25, 2004, 3:04 PM
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I could be wrong on this one but it seems to me that there is a figure 8 clipped to the bottem of the middle quickdraw. Now that would just be poor form.
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johnhemlock
Aug 25, 2004, 3:09 PM
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The biggest mistake I see is that they have forgotten the picnic basket!
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happiegrrrl
Aug 25, 2004, 3:11 PM
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I know a guy who does stock image lifestyle photography, and a while back he mentioned that the agency (or his agent - sorry, I forget which) "suggested" a story for him to shoot. It wasn't within his usual scope, and he was having some issues addressing the aspects of "being told what to do...."
I can imagine something similar happened here. Some photog is needing to get some more coin, and so his handlers throw him a bone. "we're looking for something on that "Extreme Adventure" vein - you know - climbers, skydivers, that sort of thing...."
So, off our little cameraman goes, looking to put bread on his table. He goes to that one friend of his who has a friend who knows someone who works in a gear shop who can ask one of the local guides if they can rent out some equipment for use as props on a photo shoot.....
They get to the location and no one knows how to do the harness...
Harness guy doesn't know what to do and asks for help. None of the other guys are man enough to get that close, so the photog's girlfriend/stylist (sorry - I know, but it's my imagination, and this is what I'm getting....) steps up to plate. She's thinking that of course you would need assistance to put on this highly technical aparatus, and so it makes sense that the buckle would be from behind..... She feels very cool as she corsets the man....
Anyone see those black webs hanging along behind him? Is it possible....that this was even a full-body harness? Oh pleeeze, let it be! Then I can see that my rental agent just couldn't help himself from playing a bit of fun on the crew....
Alternate scenario:
So, when they got to the shoot and went to put on the harness, one of the photoshoot members said with great authority that "real men don't use those arm loops...." But, they didn't know how to dismember the extra apendage loops....so the best they could do was put it on backwards and try to hide them....
Anyway - the shot made the website. Whether it has ever been used.....isn't there a way to check on that?.....
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jamaica
Aug 25, 2004, 3:15 PM
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That does look like a figure 8 down there, I think they just wanted to clip as many things together as possible while using a FRAYED rope.
Jamaica 8^)
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brianc
Aug 25, 2004, 3:24 PM
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Are we all missing the invaluable tip that left-hand climber is oh so subtly trying to impress upon us?
That all our gear, now so casually flopping about the harness and just ruining our center of gravity, may be more effectively managed by the careful use of two chained quickdraws?
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kimmyt
Aug 25, 2004, 3:40 PM
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This should be one of those "Caption this picture" threads
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une
Aug 25, 2004, 3:50 PM
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Registered: Feb 12, 2004
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Caption:
"n00b sets sights on El Cap"
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corpse
Aug 25, 2004, 4:19 PM
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Registered: Jan 17, 2003
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http://www.digitalface.co.uk/00183015.jpg
"Heya Marko, with this equipment we got on eBay, I bet we can climb L'Captain rock over there.. I bet once we do it, there are gonna be some hot chicks throwing themselves at our feet, glad I wore my muscle shirt."
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sublimeclimb
Aug 25, 2004, 6:25 PM
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Registered: May 4, 2004
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-what's with this whole "blaying" thing? i know, i'll just hold the rope real tight and wrap it around my forearm a couple times. that should hold ya! -where is the other dude's harness?!!
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corpse
Aug 25, 2004, 6:28 PM
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In reply to: -what's with this whole "blaying" thing? i know, i'll just hold the rope real tight and wrap it around my forearm a couple times. that should hold ya! -where is the other dude's harness?!!
REAL blayers don't need no stinkin harnesses!
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happiegrrrl
Aug 25, 2004, 7:15 PM
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Registered: Mar 25, 2004
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"Babes In The Woods: The Adventure Version"
Guy # 1: Hey Marko....are you sure this stuff was abandoned? Like, why would someone just leave their s - - - on the ground and walk away from it?
Guy # 2: Duh, dweeb... ya ever heard the term "boosted gear?"....
Guy # 1: "Boosted gear?" No..... what's that?
Guy # 2: I read about it on a website. These climbers were all bragging about the boosted gear that people leave behind, and they find it, and now it's theirs. You know - finder's keepers? Like going into a store and boosting things, only this is outside.
Guy # 1: Really? That's weird... I gues it's a lifestyle thing, huh?
Guy # 2: Yeah, pretty cool.... So, we scored big time, huh! Even a sack to carry it in!
(a few minutes pass)
Guy # 1: What's that funky smell, man? Did you eat bean burritos for breakfast again?
Guy # 2: That ain't me dude...I think it's coming from this pack... (Guy # 2 rummages through backpack and pulls out a pair of climbing shoes) Woooooah!.....I think the dude who ditched these musta had trenchfoot or something.
Guy # 1: Well, get rid of them man - they reek!
Guy # 2: (tosses shoes onto the ground and kicks them aside) Man.... I hope that stink don't get on me...like that "Seinfeld" episode...remember that one?
Guy # 1: hahahaha ...yeah, that was funny.
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dgkula
Aug 25, 2004, 7:43 PM
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Registered: May 6, 2004
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"woah, climbing that tree was rad. let's go climb another, dude."
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robbovius
Aug 25, 2004, 7:48 PM
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"DO you think anyone will notice that my ass is in front?"
"Not a chance."
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pedro_burrito
Aug 25, 2004, 7:58 PM
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Registered: May 5, 2004
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Two Alternative versions.
1 - The dude with the harness on backwards is really a climber and put it on backwards as an inside joke to his fellow climbers. "That photog dude was sooo stoopid, he didn't know my harness was on backwards!"
2 - The backward harness dude was getting ready to do an Australian rappel.
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delarig
Aug 25, 2004, 8:03 PM
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Registered: Jan 10, 2004
Posts: 167
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"Rock Climbing??? Pa-leasse! No WAY!! C'mon, hop in my pink Mazda Miata and let's go eat cheesecake."
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on_sight_man
Aug 25, 2004, 8:07 PM
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Registered: Jun 11, 2002
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They're not climbers. Their muscles are too symetrical.
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jstone
Aug 25, 2004, 8:31 PM
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Registered: Jun 5, 2004
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thanks alot you guys- i'm at the office, but now i have to go home and change my pants----
this was the greates humor of my day- where did this come from - i think we would all like to know.
perhaps a forum- just for non-climber climbing pics?
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