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ladyscarlett
Jan 28, 2009, 1:45 AM
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As a beginner, I have to ask about climbing buddy etiquette.
Right now I have awesome climbing buddies-no concerns.
Yet in the past few months I have been involved in some odd climbing partner drama.
Example: I do go to a gym between outdoor trips(a girl's has to train! Have to keep up!). I go enough that I am part of a group of friends who belay each other if needed if we see each other, nothing complicated. Drama = person 1 has unknown disagreement with person 2. Person 1 gets upset at me for belaying person 2 and equates it to cheating. Is this junior high?!
I know this isn't climbing specific, but understanding the etiquette within a community is important and I don't want to inadvertently ruffle feathers (I do that on purpose!) . Is it possible to "cheat" on climbing buddies? Are you expected to ask permission from one partner to climb with another person? Not joining, but simply climbing with another person when regular partner is not available?
Is this kind of reaction more of a person to person specific? Is there climbing buddy etiquette I should know about?
insight appreciated!
ls
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bradley3297
Jan 28, 2009, 1:54 AM
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That sounds RIDICULOUS. i climb with alot of partners. some better than me and some equal ability and some not as good as me. i think having multiple partners is a good thing. i climb too often for most people anyway have a single partner. but the whole cheating thing. ridiculous. whoever these people are they need to get a grip. they must have abandonment issues or something...lol.
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16stfd16
Jan 28, 2009, 2:15 AM
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That is prolly most rediculous thing ive heard, unfortunatley i do know some people who act like that, ive been denied belays and had climbing trips turned down becuase the climber will say somthing like "i would belay you but my partner gets kinda jelous" i think its really funny when somthing like that happens. But whatever i guess, i mean who am i to get in between their bro-mance.
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subantz
Jan 28, 2009, 2:33 AM
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I will take a catch from any friend anytime. As long as I trust the person belaying. I guess you could say I am a climbing partner whore.
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brownie710
Jan 28, 2009, 2:39 AM
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hilarious, two of my climbing buddies climb together very often and when I climb with one without the other I always joke that i'm the mistress. we all think it's funny though, no one get's pissy. I'd say if someone does call em on it and if it's a big deal avoid them
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looserock
Jan 28, 2009, 2:55 AM
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Sounds like a case of an obsessive acquaintance. I've met some over the years. They go thru life smothering every friend they make. 
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coastal_climber
Jan 28, 2009, 3:35 AM
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bradley3297 wrote: i think having multiple partners is a good thing.
I concur.
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moose_droppings
Jan 28, 2009, 4:13 AM
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ladyscarlett wrote: Is this junior high?!
ding* ding* ding*
I'm going with this answer.
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oldsalt
Jan 28, 2009, 4:51 AM
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I will give anyone a belay in the gym, but I want to see them belaying someone else before I take a ride from them. I don't always follow my own advice, but it is a gut call when I don't.
The best way to add an "any time/any place" belayer is to climb outdoors with them and swap lead belays. After that, I would trust them without concern.
A top rope belay in a gym tells you only if the person is an idiot, not that they are competent.
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cush
Jan 28, 2009, 5:42 AM
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punch them both in the nose and get some new, more mature friends.
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mince
Jan 28, 2009, 5:45 AM
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holy shit this is insanity
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curt
Jan 28, 2009, 5:53 AM
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Time to take up bouldering.
Curt
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clmbr
Jan 28, 2009, 6:01 AM
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Hi ladyscarlett. I wouldn't think you're in the wrong at all even if you knew they had disagreement.All ur doing is rock climbing after all.
I'd think the only way someone could be upset is if you told one friend you can't climb that day and rock on up with someone else while they're there. That might be a little awkward. I always check the carpark thoroughly if I do that.
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suilenroc
Jan 28, 2009, 8:30 AM
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Its CLIMBING not SEX.
Get on with your life.
The End.
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dudemanbu
Jan 28, 2009, 1:27 PM
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coastal_climber wrote: bradley3297 wrote: i think having multiple partners is a good thing. I concur.
As long as you use adequate protection.
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taydude
Jan 28, 2009, 2:14 PM
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I think you'll find that this drama tends to stay in the gym. Only time I've seen this sort of thing perpetuate outside is when the idiots that do it all go sport climbing together. Long story short, I'm never going sport climbing with that many people ever again.
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Tree_wrangler
Jan 28, 2009, 2:30 PM
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In reply to: Sounds like a case of an obsessive acquaintance. I've met some over the years. They go thru life smothering every friend they make.
I've met more than a few. Probably because I make the mistake of respectfully listening to their pathetic ramblings for more than 10 seconds.
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lodi5onu
Jan 28, 2009, 2:32 PM
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Yeah right! Talk about jumping from the frying pan into the fryer. Bouldering has it's completely own rules of ettiquette from top-roping.
just a few examples, many of which have been covered in other threads:
1. Powerspotting a chick without getting the OK from her bf is grounds for a beatdown, unless you climb harder than him because the harder climber always supersedes the weaker
2. Spraying beta is acceptable if you have seen the problem in question being sent. If you have yourself sent the problem, than unsolicited beta is acceptable
3. When watching a stronger climber try a problem, some words of encouragement are required, whether he/she sends or not...this will allow others in the gym know that you understand the ettiquette and realize your place in the hierarchy
4. If there are movable mats on the floor, relocating the mats is acceptable only under the following circumstances.
a. nobody else is using the mat
b. a hot chick needs the mat
c. you are the stronger climber
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N_Oo_B
Jan 28, 2009, 3:30 PM
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lol
loose the idiot friends, get new ones that have grown up.
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lena_chita
Moderator
Jan 28, 2009, 3:32 PM
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moose_droppings wrote: ladyscarlett wrote: Is this junior high?! ding* ding* ding* I'm going with this answer.
Me too.
Some people bring drama into everything.
There is no special "climber buddy etiquette". There are general rules of polite behavior that apply to climbing partners, as well other people.
If you made specific arrangements with one person for specific time and day -- then yeah, you don't just start climbing with another person without saying something to the first person, and the proper thing to do would be not to ditch the first person you made prior arrangements with, but to ask that person if he/she would mind the third spur-fo-the-moment person joining the two of you, if you feel obligated to help that third person, too.
If there haven't been any arangements made-- then you can climb with whoever is there, but again, if all of you are part of the same group, the polite thing to do would be to include the odd-one-out who may not have anyone else to climb with on that day.
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d0nk3yk0n9
Jan 28, 2009, 3:34 PM
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Adding to the bouldering etiquette, but on a slightly more serious note, when multiple people are climbing the same problem, it's courteous to spot others, unless, as mentioned before, they (or their significant others) tell you not to. Also, people tend to get slightly annoyed with you if you jump in front of them to climb a problem. Finally, wipe the mud and dirt off of your shoes before you start climbing anything; not only does this help you climb, but other people hate it when you get all the holds muddy and harder to climb on.
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karlie
Jan 28, 2009, 3:36 PM
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"Powerspotting" ?
more details please
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Gmburns2000
Jan 28, 2009, 3:56 PM
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ladyscarlett wrote: As a beginner, I have to ask about climbing buddy etiquette. Right now I have awesome climbing buddies-no concerns. Yet in the past few months I have been involved in some odd climbing partner drama. Example: I do go to a gym between outdoor trips(a girl's has to train! Have to keep up!). I go enough that I am part of a group of friends who belay each other if needed if we see each other, nothing complicated. Drama = person 1 has unknown disagreement with person 2. Person 1 gets upset at me for belaying person 2 and equates it to cheating. Is this junior high?! I know this isn't climbing specific, but understanding the etiquette within a community is important and I don't want to inadvertently ruffle feathers (I do that on purpose!) . Is it possible to "cheat" on climbing buddies? Are you expected to ask permission from one partner to climb with another person? Not joining, but simply climbing with another person when regular partner is not available? Is this kind of reaction more of a person to person specific? Is there climbing buddy etiquette I should know about? insight appreciated! ls
I would've punched Person 1 in the chops. And then I would have gone out on a well-publicized date with Person 2 just for spite.
Person 1 sounds like a douchebag.
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