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Couple things that should never be said while climbing
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bmxer


Mar 6, 2005, 10:21 PM
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Couple things that should never be said while climbing
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"Oh yeah, feel that crack up."

"I can't feel you belaying me."

If anyone can think of more please post. Two just isn't good enough.


ufdigga


Mar 7, 2005, 12:24 AM
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Re: Couple things that should never be said while climbing [In reply to]
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community forum?


Partner climbinginchico


Mar 7, 2005, 12:38 AM
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Re: Couple things that should never be said while climbing [In reply to]
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"What's a cordelette for?" :roll:




This thread has been done a million times.

Do a search, and go back to riding your undersized bike.


phatcat


Mar 7, 2005, 12:43 AM
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"hey, i'll just belay you by standing on the rope!"


jffknapp


Mar 7, 2005, 1:21 AM
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Oh look, a bear!


nonick


Mar 7, 2005, 3:34 AM
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Is that a snake in the crack?

This has happened before..


overlord


Mar 7, 2005, 4:05 AM
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am i on belay yet????


simplesoul


Mar 7, 2005, 5:23 AM
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"am I going the right way?"
"YES!!! UP!!!"


jackhammer


Mar 7, 2005, 5:41 AM
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1. Woops

2. Oh Oh

3. Oops

4. Could you hold what you got for a second?


azrockclimber


Mar 7, 2005, 5:42 AM
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"yeah, it's the climb with the bloodstain at the base"

alrighty then!??


ropesologuy


Mar 7, 2005, 7:22 AM
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'oh shit my back is broken.......again" quoting Jack Tackle


cchildre


Mar 7, 2005, 7:28 AM
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"How do you tie a figure 8 again?"

"motherf*&$ing, c*$sucking, fence painting, ball knocking, rusty trombone playing, whorebag of a route. Who bolted this?" all the while a group of cub scouts watches in amazement, they got their cursing badge that day.


Partner angry


Mar 7, 2005, 7:29 AM
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I got herpes from her but it's OK, she's my sister.


Partner jammer


Mar 7, 2005, 7:36 AM
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Oh Man ... I thought i just had to fart! :shock:


Partner j_ung


Mar 7, 2005, 7:43 AM
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Re: Couple things that should never be said while climbing [In reply to]
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To your belayer:

In reply to:
I've been waiting for the right time to tell you this and this seems like as good time as any. (insert confession here)

Conversely, the above is precisely the right time to confess transgressions to your climber. But it should look a little more like this:

In reply to:
I've been waiting for the right time to tell you this and this seems like as good time as any. (insert confession here) Do you forgive me?

For the prefect moment, keep your eye on the leader's Screamer clipped to an out-of-the-way section of the rack. When he or she moves to grab it, start confessing.


8flood8


Mar 7, 2005, 8:48 AM
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Re: Couple things that should never be said while climbing [In reply to]
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so... i pull on the rope right?


areuinclimber


Mar 7, 2005, 8:59 AM
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... hey can you finish this thing yourself? im late for a meeting..


t-nutz
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Mar 7, 2005, 9:50 AM
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Re: Couple things that should never be said while climbing [In reply to]
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The climber: hey do know that girl you were tring to get with last night
The belay: ya, but she didn't come home with me last night
The climber: I know because she went to my house
The climber: hey why did the rope go slack?


galt


Mar 7, 2005, 10:01 AM
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Re: Couple things that should never be said while climbing [In reply to]
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T-Nutz... yours was good, but I prefer:


Belayer: Hey, you know that chick you hooked up with last night?
Climber: Yea, dude she was HOT. We got trashed and she ended up at my place. Man, I didn't know a girl could be that rough in bed.
Belayer: Yea, that was my sister. Off belay.


speedywon


Mar 7, 2005, 11:15 AM
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Re: Couple things that should never be said while climbing [In reply to]
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At the beginning of pitch 2-3, after the leader has just placed 1st piece of pro:
Belayer: This may not be the best time to tell you, but your rope is really looking freyed down here.


bmxer


Mar 7, 2005, 11:27 AM
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Good ones people, I just thought of this:

After the climber has reached about halfway up the sport route:

Belayer: "Hey dude, I've been reading the guide book and it said not to climb this route. The bolts are supposed to be really bad."
Climber: "Dude! You've been reading this whole time!?!"
Belayer: "Umm..."


bmxer


Mar 7, 2005, 3:09 PM
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"Hey dude, there's a native american looking fellow at the top of this route, and he looks PISSED."


terragirl952


Mar 7, 2005, 4:13 PM
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climber: CRAP! HOLY MOTHER F***ING CRAP!
belayer: WHAT!
this actually happened to me, i being the belayer. Turned oyut the dude has just found out his water bottle was leaking. the team learder almost called the rescue people because he thought the guy was hurt. :shock: it was bad for me because the leader thought i had let slack in the rope.


Partner gunksgoer


Mar 7, 2005, 5:29 PM
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"dude, i lubed your cams last nite, how do they feel?"


labrat0065


Mar 7, 2005, 5:53 PM
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In reply to:
Good ones people, I just thought of this:

After the climber has reached about halfway up the sport route:

Belayer: "Hey dude, I've been reading the guide book and it said not to climb this route. The bolts are supposed to be really bad."
Climber: "Dude! You've been reading this whole time!?!"
Belayer: "Umm..."

i seriously can't stop laughing, the worst part is i know people like that

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