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squierbypetzl
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Dec 20, 2005, 4:24 AM
Post #101 of 171
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IŽd already told you, guys can do a lot of things for fun, in this case flirt just for the heck of it. The juicier point (and the one people like to stick with) is whether youŽre comfortable with it, and if not what youŽre going to do about it.
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litleclimberchick
Dec 20, 2005, 4:34 AM
Post #102 of 171
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i talked to him a couple of days ago and he said he would stop... but i haven't seen him since then cuz we've both been sick and then i work mornings and he works nights... so hopefully he will stop since he knows it bugs me... i'll just have to wait and see...
lcc
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squierbypetzl
Moderator
Dec 20, 2005, 4:37 AM
Post #103 of 171
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In reply to: i talked to him a couple of days ago and he said he would stop... but i haven't seen him since then cuz we've both been sick and then i work mornings and he works nights... so hopefully he will stop since he knows it bugs me... i'll just have to wait and see... lcc
Guess you will.
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littlejames
Dec 20, 2005, 9:57 AM
Post #104 of 171
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At the risk of sounding like a dick, don't come back and whinge when (not if) he cheats on you further down the track.
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nd2boostt
Dec 22, 2005, 9:59 PM
Post #105 of 171
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In reply to: i talked to him and he said he would stop playing his little game... ...then i figured just to even things out... i would spend a night out with the guys without him... i know i probably shouldn't have done that, but too late... lcc
So...explain why exactly it's a bad thing to hang out with guys alone? Does he not "allow" that? Sorry, but if that's the case, that would be enough to make me question some things about the relationship. It's one thing to go out partying with guys you don't know well, but if these are "friends"...what's the problem??
And girl, I gotta say, it sounds to me like you are WAAAAY too caught up in this guy. Now, I'm only 23, so I can remember when I was 19, in a relationship, and thought I was set for life (yeah, we broke up). But...it doesn't sound like you're very happy. Do you really want to keep going with someone you're not happy with...someone that isn't willing to do anything to make you happy...when there are SO many other people out there?!? The world won't stop if you guys end it. And, if he's broken up with you before, AND he's blatantly disrespecting you, it doesn't sound to me like he's in it 100%.
I'm sure you know in you're gut what the right thing to do is. Sometimes it's hard as hell to do it, but it's for the best.
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litleclimberchick
Dec 22, 2005, 10:08 PM
Post #106 of 171
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well, he broke up with me yesterday morning... but to answer your question, no i wasn't allowed to hang out with the guys on my own. i suppose i can do that as often as i want now... but i have no idea what things are going to be like when all of our friends get together and i have to see him again...
i don't want to see him for a while. i need time to figure out who i am again, because honestly, i don't know anymore... i was who (i felt) he wanted me to be... and now, i just don't know...
lcc
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nd2boostt
Dec 22, 2005, 10:26 PM
Post #107 of 171
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Well, rest assured that it's for the better. You don't want to waste your time with someone that doesn't love you back. It's harsh, and it hurts, but it's true! You deserve better.
Now it's time for you to go find out who you were/are....and make your own new friends! My advice...don't go out looking for another relationship! Meet new people...make new friends...explore other hobbies...it's your turn to be selfish! And, if Mr. Right just so happens to wander into your life when you're least expecting it (happened to me!!), take it slooooooow. Hold out for someone that respects you, loves and adores you, and wants you to be who you truly are. Life is too short to be unhappy!!!
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codhands
Dec 22, 2005, 11:45 PM
Post #108 of 171
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KEEP CLIMBING!!! :D
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litleclimberchick
Dec 22, 2005, 11:51 PM
Post #109 of 171
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don't worry, i will
lcc
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boondock_saint
Dec 22, 2005, 11:54 PM
Post #110 of 171
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nd2boostt we missed your hottness in the singles thread, not that crimpergirl's butt and the hint of clausti's boobies (plus numerous other hotties who contributed) weren't enough, but there's always room for your kind of hottness
LLC, I'm tellin' ya. Hook up with me dude. You got two thousand miles of freedom to do what ya want and when guys ask you can play hard to get and say you're involved with someone :lol:
Other than I'm pretty low maintance - but we can discuss that in PM ...
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comet
Dec 23, 2005, 1:08 AM
Post #111 of 171
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In reply to: i was who (i felt) he wanted me to be...
This is dangerous, because you get lost, and other people don't get the benefit of knowing and loving the real you. You might actually enjoy getting those bits of yourself back, however sucky it may be in the beginning.
Also, any guy who doesn't "let" you hang out with other guys has some serious issues (not that the previous reason for being concerned about him wasn't one :shock: ). There are lots of other cute boys out there who don't. REALLY.
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blondgecko
Moderator
Dec 23, 2005, 1:15 AM
Post #112 of 171
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In reply to: well, he broke up with me...
Good.
Only thing that would have been better is if you'd done it first.
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litleclimberchick
Dec 23, 2005, 5:02 AM
Post #113 of 171
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i couldn't break up with him...
lcc
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zao479
Dec 23, 2005, 5:16 AM
Post #114 of 171
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It sounds to me like he's a jerk, and you should have enough pride to make him respect you. Don't let him govern who you are. If he has to do that then he doesn't like "you". Your better than that. There are plenty of good guys out there that are man enough to take you as you are without being Intimidating or controlling.
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nd2boostt
Dec 23, 2005, 2:04 PM
Post #115 of 171
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In reply to: nd2boostt we missed your hottness in the singles thread, not that crimpergirl's butt and the hint of clausti's boobies (plus numerous other hotties who contributed) weren't enough, but there's always room for your kind of hottness LLC, I'm tellin' ya. Hook up with me dude. You got two thousand miles of freedom to do what ya want and when guys ask you can play hard to get and say you're involved with someone :lol: Other than I'm pretty low maintance - but we can discuss that in PM ...
Aww you're sweet. Hit on me, then follow that up by hitting on someone else in the next paragraph.... :lol:
:wink:
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boondock_saint
Dec 23, 2005, 2:26 PM
Post #116 of 171
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hahaha wel ya can't waste time, life is short !!! :lol:
just kidding
I'm well aware that you're taken, so you can't really blame for not barking up *that* tree ... doesn't make you any less hot though, I'll tell ya that ;)
Besides, it's all just fun and games with me and LLC, she's too short for me anyway. everyone knows:
..... ____
......../\ ........<- you have to be this tall to ride this ride :lol:
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overlord
Dec 23, 2005, 5:06 PM
Post #117 of 171
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In reply to: i don't want to see him for a while. i need time to figure out who i am again, because honestly, i don't know anymore... i was who (i felt) he wanted me to be... and now, i just don't know...
you see, here is the problem.
never date a guy who doesnt like you the way you are. its just not worth it. ESPECIALLY in this case. and dont worry about seeing him again. just tell him to f**k off if hell want something and get somebody better.
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clausti
Dec 23, 2005, 7:38 PM
Post #118 of 171
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lcc....
fuck, dude.
edited to remove a bunch of bullshit.
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boondock_saint
Dec 23, 2005, 7:47 PM
Post #119 of 171
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In reply to: you MAY hate life and wanna f---ing die if hes torn away. it may be too painful to see him. it may be more painful to not see him, but it will result in better healing.
Or MAYbe senorita clausti is just overly dramatic ? hmmmmmmmmmmm
LLC, you are 18. You say you want some time to figure out who you are again, but I very much doubt you *knew* who you ever were. There's nothing wrong with dating people and being in relationships but a good healthy dose of solitude is just as good, even better if you easily let guys manipulate you into change. I can't comment much on that because I don't know if your other ex boyfriends were similar. If you always end up with a guy who wants to change you, it's probably because you give off the vibe that you will let them.
Take some time off and just do your own thing for a while, your dating life won't even really start for another 3 years ...
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t-dog
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Dec 23, 2005, 8:10 PM
Post #120 of 171
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In reply to: write his breakup line to you on a notecard and stick it to your mirror. at first, every time you see it you'll cry. then you'll try and ignore it, be embarassed. then you'll be angy and think hes full of s---. then you'll hate his guts, his fav sports team, his f---ing sweatshirt, his cologne, and his dog. then you'll be sorry again. and maybe you'll see both sides. and when you can forgive both him and yourself then you can call him.
Holy crap, chicks actually *do* this?!?!?! :shock:
Whatever happened to good old fashioned drinking your sorrows away?
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gqsmooth
Dec 23, 2005, 8:29 PM
Post #121 of 171
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Ok I gotta give it raw, becuase 8 pages of this is deserving of some brutally-honest-smack-you-in-the-face-wake-the-fuck-up tactics. For 8, count 'em, eight freakin pages you have gone on. You opened this can of worms. Not a bad thing, you cared about this dude, understood. Breaking up is hard to do, understood. However, people here, including myself, have a generally positive opinion of you. They say you are a smart girl, I agree I guess. They say you are cute/hot, yeah what the hell, I agree. They say you are funny, yep, you put some pretty good shit on here. But READ what you have written about this. Some disturbing stuff, yet somehow familiar when it comes to ladies your age. Honestly.
In reply to: I couldn't break up with him In reply to: I wasn't allowed to hang out with the guys In reply to: I was who (i felt) he wanted me to be
Do girls really do this to themselves? Put all this pressure on themselves to please the guy? Its crap, and stop if you do. This guy probably liked LCC in the first place because he thought she was a smart, independent, strong woman. LCC prolly felt like she need to continually impress him by becoming what she thought he wanted until BAM!, he leaves her. Nothing kills attraction for me like some girl placating me. Be who you were when I tried to get to know you initially, and I probably won't stop wanting to know and definitely won't look for something else that interests me again, like 14 year olds. Really not trying to attack but just wanted you to know.
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mowz
Dec 23, 2005, 9:38 PM
Post #122 of 171
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Hell. I'll attack if you won't.
I understand the whole "love is blind" shit, but for shit's sake, wake the fuck up!!!!!!!! We've all been in positions where, because we were IN the position, we couldn't really see the truth. This is different. There has been pages and pages of advice and, yet, you still prefer to walk around aimless.
Know what I think? I think you just want someone out there to say, "Hey, it is ok for this fuck to flirt with 14 year old girls in front of you. It's perfectly normal for an adult to hit on jailbait in front of his girlfriend. You have nothing to worry about." That's what you want to hear, right?
I had this friend in college once and she got asked out by a long-time friend of her's. She kept asking me and all our friends what she should do. We all told her that it's not a good idea. She still kept asking. So finally we told her that it's a great idea for her to date this guy. Guess what? She did and now they are miserable.
So go ahead. Do not heed our advice. Keep dating this prick and see where it gets you.
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happiegrrrl
Dec 23, 2005, 10:04 PM
Post #123 of 171
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In reply to: Whatever happened to good old fashioned drinking your sorrows away?
...umm, who ever said it had to be an either/or deal? We're women, after all. Multi-tasking is part of our genetic make-up....
In reply to: Do girls really do this to themselves? Put all this pressure on themselves to please the guy? Its crap, and stop if you do.
SOME women do. Some women listen to their guy tell them "You should" or "You're too" or "If you would only" and it burrrns. Sooner or later, if it doesn't get taken care of on the first instance, unless we really do have gutter-level self-esteem, we will snuff out that flame.
Clasuti also wasn't overly dramatic, from the stuff you guys quoted. I didn't see her post in it's entirety, but nothing she said seemed overly dramatic....
Look, this girl wanted to give her bf the benefit of the doubt. She cared for him, and didn't want to ditch things. In her heart, she knew he was treating her shabbily, but it really can be difficult to sort these things out on your own. She's young and she's learning. I'm 43 years old and I only wish I had learned the lesson she is now learning when I was her age.
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hangerlessbolt
Dec 23, 2005, 10:42 PM
Post #124 of 171
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Interesting
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litleclimberchick
Dec 23, 2005, 11:24 PM
Post #125 of 171
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In reply to: Besides, it's all just fun and games with me and LLC, she's too short for me anyway. everyone knows: ..... ____ ......../\ ........<- you have to be this tall to ride this ride :lol: ........|| ........|| ........|| ........||
aww... that was mean... :(
lcc
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