lolol.

hosh, this is quite an original post. and damn funny at that

even yosar can't kill chuck norris

As much as he is a funny persona, I only wish to be in half that good of shape in my 60's. He's lived a full and interesting life for sure...

As much as he is a funny persona, I only wish to be in half that good of shape in my 60's. He's lived a full and interesting life for sure...

Are you kidding? Chuck Norris is a terrible "b" actor always has been always will. Yes the guy might be in good shape, but why the assumption about his full and interesting life? Was it the infomercials he does that lead you to think this or perhaps it was Delta Force?
The only reason any of this thread is in the least bit funny is because Chuck Norris is such a dildo.

man, shut up. post this drivel in the choss pile.

hosh.

edit to add:
you're not original.

:roll:

One Halloween, Mr. T got dressed up in a Chuck Norris suit and went to Chuck's house for some candy. When Chuck Norris opened the door, Mr. T roundhouse kicked Chuck in the eye and ate all his candy. Mr. T now has two Chuck Norris Suits.

Steven Hawking was paralysed after Mr. T pitied him so hard he was hurled through the air and crashed into an orphanage, killing 50.

The "One Ring To Rule Them All" hangs securely around Mr. T's neck. Mr. T is THE lord of the rings.

23. That's the number of people Mr. T has pitied in the time it has taken you to read this sentence.

Only once has Mr. T pitied himself. This event was so catastrophic that it went back through time and killed off the dinosaurs.

In Soviet Russia, the fools pitied Mr. T! This explains why there is no longer a Soviet Russia.

The algebraic equation for Mr. T is:
T = Pi(t+y)/f
Where “f” is the number of fools being pitied at any given moment.

Like King Midas, everything Mr. T touches turns to gold, even food. Unlike King Midas, Mr. T has learned to ingest gold, like a real man would.

Mr. T's kids once went out in the yard to play before they did their homework. He pitied those little fools and tore down their swingset.

Mr. T is the Dance Dance Revolution World Champion.

One fool needed so much pitying Mr. T had to take a break and let Chuck Norris pity the fool for awhile, after which Mr. T pitied Chuck because he wasn't wearing enough gold necklaces to properly pity the fool.

Mr. T. is the winner!

Are you kidding? Chuck Norris is a terrible "b" actor always has been always will. Yes the guy might be in good shape, but why the assumption about his full and interesting life? Was it the infomercials he does that lead you to think this or perhaps it was Delta Force?
The only reason any of this thread is in the least bit funny is because Chuck Norris is such a dildo.

Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.

dynosore wrote:
As much as he is a funny persona, I only wish to be in half that good of shape in my 60's. He's lived a full and interesting life for sure...

Six-time undefeated World Professional MiddleWeight Karate Champion.

Founder and President of United Fighting Arts Federation with over 2,300 black belts all over the world.

In 1997, Chuck achieved another milestone in his life by being the first man ever in the Western Hemisphere to be awarded an 8th degree Black Belt Grand Master recognition in the Tae Kwon Do system. This was a first in 4,500 years of tradition.

He became an offshore powerboat racer with speeds of 140 miles per hour. In 1991, Chuck with his team and sponsor "Popeye Chicken" won the World Off Shore Powerboat championships. Then he went on to setting a new world record by racing a 38 foot Scarab boat 605 miles across the Great Lakes, from Chicago to Detroit, in 12 hours and 8 minutes.

In 1988, Chuck wrote his autobiography, "The Secret of Inner Strength", for Little Brown Publishing, which became a New York Times Best Seller.

Chuck was asked how he would like to be remembered. Chuck's answer was as a Humanitarian. He has gotten a good start by:

1.) Being the spokesperson for United Way, doing an eight-minute commercial, which helped bring in over two billion dollars.

2.) Veterans Administration spokesperson visiting over 12 V.A. hospitals and speaking with World War II, Korean and Vietnam War Veterans including one from World War I.

3.) Winning the 1998 Epiphany award on Walker, Texas Ranger for the best Christian program.

4.) The Jewish Humanitarian Man of the Year Award.

5.) Actively involved with the Make A Wish Foundation for 20 years by making dreams come true for terminally ill children.

6.) BMI Music Television Award for Walker, Texas Ranger theme song, "Eyes of a Ranger".

7.) Texas Ranger Hall of Fame.

8.) Commissioned Police Officer for Terrell, Texas.

9.) Motivational speaker for many Christian ministries, such as T.D. Jakes Ministry, Trinity Broadcasting, and Bill Glass Crusade.

But Chuck thinks his most rewarding accomplishment was the creation of his Kick-Start Foundation. With the help of President George Bush, Chuck implemented a program teaching the martial arts to 150 high-risk children at M C Williams Middle School in Houston, Texas, as part of the school curriculum. The program was so successful in helping these kids raise their self-esteem and instilling discipline and respect, as well as getting them out of gangs, that the program is now in 30 schools with over 4,200 young boys and girls actively participating.

HA! You obviously don't know much about the man's real life.



But I'm sure you've done more....STFU!

jred wrote:


HA! You obviously don't know much about the man's real life.



But I'm sure you've done more....STFU!

Yeah great one man, first of all Chuck has almost thirty years on me, but I have done my fair share of charity work. I like your choice of heros, who else? Sally Struthers, Tod Bridges, Tina Yothers, Mark Hammil? I will state again, the only reason any of this is funny is because Chuck Norris is such a dildo. Chuck Norris has done for martial arts what Tom Cruise has done for climbing.
Did You really research Chuck Norris and then type out his biography, wow! that is incredible, you must lead quite an exciting life, but you sure showed me! Oh, and by the way, Tae-Kwon-Do can trace its roots back to about 13000 years ago, not 4500yrs. ago.