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bizarrodrinker
Mar 29, 2007, 7:16 PM
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slablizard wrote: bizarrodrinker wrote: When has understanding ever had anything to do with personal preference? How do you call it when you can understand what a woman is trying to tell you? She gives you her number...she looks at you..what else you need, a sign? It is implied that she is a good looking woman, she has to be to be so sure of herself to make a move like that. Maybe I'm to busy to call that night, that weekend or even before the next time I see the girl.... Women are not every straight man's top priority all the time.
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slablizard
Mar 29, 2007, 7:26 PM
Post #27 of 52
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bizarrodrinker wrote: slablizard wrote: bizarrodrinker wrote: When has understanding ever had anything to do with personal preference? How do you call it when you can understand what a woman is trying to tell you? She gives you her number...she looks at you..what else you need, a sign? It is implied that she is a good looking woman, she has to be to be so sure of herself to make a move like that. Maybe I'm to busy to call that night, that weekend or even before the next time I see the girl.... Women are not every straight man's top priority all the time. we're talking about understanding, not availability.
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rocksssatin
Mar 29, 2007, 7:32 PM
Post #28 of 52
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slablizard wrote: bizarrodrinker wrote: slablizard wrote: bizarrodrinker wrote: When has understanding ever had anything to do with personal preference? How do you call it when you can understand what a woman is trying to tell you? She gives you her number...she looks at you..what else you need, a sign? It is implied that she is a good looking woman, she has to be to be so sure of herself to make a move like that. Maybe I'm to busy to call that night, that weekend or even before the next time I see the girl.... Women are not every straight man's top priority all the time. we're talking about understanding, not availability. and I might be busy, but when THAT thought crosses my mind and strikes, everthing else vanishes. but that's me
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bizarrodrinker
Mar 30, 2007, 11:27 AM
Post #29 of 52
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rocksssatin wrote: slablizard wrote: bizarrodrinker wrote: slablizard wrote: bizarrodrinker wrote: When has understanding ever had anything to do with personal preference? How do you call it when you can understand what a woman is trying to tell you? She gives you her number...she looks at you..what else you need, a sign? It is implied that she is a good looking woman, she has to be to be so sure of herself to make a move like that. Maybe I'm to busy to call that night, that weekend or even before the next time I see the girl.... Women are not every straight man's top priority all the time. we're talking about understanding, not availability. and I might be busy, but when THAT thought crosses my mind and strikes, everthing else vanishes. but that's me Well that really depends on the person. Its a rarity that I meet someone I am that interested in. Most of the time it is pretty casual. But then my personality tends to clash with others' a lot so I end up spending a lot of time by myself. Which I am okay with...I like myself.
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climbingbetty22
Mar 30, 2007, 2:52 PM
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bizarrodrinker wrote: Rest assured though I stay on top of things that I deem worthwhile. This just begs to be taken out of context....
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bizarrodrinker
Mar 30, 2007, 3:56 PM
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I suppose it does doesn't it. How about, I will keep my important affairs in order.
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fenix83
Moderator
Mar 30, 2007, 5:03 PM
Post #32 of 52
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rrradam wrote: But if the chick wants a guy who'll lead, as in decide where you're going to dinner instead of saying, "I don't know, where do you wanna go?", then you're just asking for it... If a guy doesn't have the balls to ask you out, he's not gonna have the balls to tell you what he wants to do. Sorry bro, but I have to disagree with this completely. I've been asked out or been given numbers on a few occasions where I didn't ask for them. In some cases I didn't feel it was appropriate to ask for a date then and there, in others I was pretty sure she wasn't interested (lo and behold I was wrong) and in others I wasn't especially interested (maybe just not interested yet), but the panache and attitude displayed by an act like that forced me to re-evaluate my assessment of the girl. Does any of this change the fact that I am opinionated, strong-willed and independent... not really. It just changes the circumstances of the first encounter. I looooove strong women, and there are few things I find sexier than a woman who is confident enough to go for what she wants. -F
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olive
Mar 30, 2007, 8:02 PM
Post #33 of 52
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hmm, unfortunately, my experience has been like climbingbetty's. The times that "I went after what I want" did not turn out to be good at all. I, too, have thought, that this was 21st century and men might enjoy a woman who is clear about what she wants. But no. It was as if it was too easy for them because I wanted them. So, no. not anymore for me. Which sucks by the way cause I am naturally very direct. If I am sure about something I say it/go after it etc. etc. It is hard for me to wait around for a guy to ask me out.
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fenix83
Moderator
Mar 30, 2007, 8:26 PM
Post #34 of 52
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If that is what happened to you, then I think you are really lucky. If a guy can't handle a woman who knows what she wants and goes for it, then he doesn't deserve that type of woman. What kind of relationship could you expect to have with a guy that is so weak that he finds it unattractive for you ta have your own ideas and run with them?! -F
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ratherbe
Apr 2, 2007, 12:30 AM
Post #36 of 52
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If I want something, I go for it. So, I have, in the past and most likely will in the future, asked a guy out. And every time, the guy has indicated that he thought it was pretty cool that I did it. And, no, none of those relationships made it for the long haul, but it wasn't because our first date was initiated by me. So go for it, if you can think of a way to do it where you'll be comfortable (you'll still be nervous). Because if you aren't comfortable or feel like yourself, it's probably going to be apparent. Good luck!
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curt
Apr 2, 2007, 2:28 AM
Post #37 of 52
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rrradam wrote: grampacharlie wrote: I beleive that women in general are better at perceiving small clues (say during a conversation)than men. I have no reason or basis for this statement other than personal experience. It may be that guys aren't that skilled at recognizing subtle social cues,... Its because we are fuck'n stupid... Well, there's that of course. But (and this is to kasharp) men don't really like rejection any more than you do. So, that guy who you may be interested in, might not be asking you out for exactly the same reason you're not asking him out. Kinda' messed up, I know--but true. Curt
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lhwang
Apr 2, 2007, 2:35 AM
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I think aside from being scared of rejection, some guys are scared of being perceived as a creep. I met my boyfriend while I was looking for climbing partners. I had to make the first move because he couldn't really tell if Iw as interested and didn't want to be the stereotypical guy at the gym.
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clee03m
Apr 2, 2007, 1:22 PM
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Unfortunatley, I do agree with some of the ladies that it seems that even in this day and age, some men are turned off by being asked out. So I used to just 'worked it' until they asked me out. But if you don't know how to do that (or can't be bothered to do it--'cause it can be a lot of work)....I guess the next best option is to ask them out. I would hate to wonder about what if's.
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jumpingrock
Apr 2, 2007, 7:21 PM
Post #40 of 52
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You know what's funny; you get a couple of girls out there who say they tried to ask a guy out and got shot down. The funny part is that this happens to guys ALL the time. If I had a nickle for each time I got shot down by a girl I'd almost have a dollar now. It has nothing to do with 21st century. It has to do with the fellow not being interested. Nothing wrong with them, nothing wrong with you.
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stymingersfink
Apr 3, 2007, 1:20 AM
Post #41 of 52
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i'd have made a dollar this week...
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picklejuice
Apr 5, 2007, 8:55 PM
Post #43 of 52
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Heck yeah I've asked guys out. If I like a guy, why not? Keeps life exciting and I like the heart-pounding, little bit nervous feeling... True, you might get shot down but life is too short not to take chances...
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themadmilkman
Apr 5, 2007, 9:37 PM
Post #44 of 52
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jumpingrock wrote: You know what's funny; you get a couple of girls out there who say they tried to ask a guy out and got shot down. The funny part is that this happens to guys ALL the time. If I had a nickle for each time I got shot down by a girl I'd almost have a dollar now. It has nothing to do with 21st century. It has to do with the fellow not being interested. Nothing wrong with them, nothing wrong with you. A VERY valid point.
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climbs4fun
Moderator
Apr 8, 2007, 6:12 PM
Post #46 of 52
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Asking guys out has never worked well for me either ladies. But I'm also pretty dense when it comes to getting the little clues of when a guy is interested in me or not.
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BeachBunny
Apr 8, 2007, 10:44 PM
Post #47 of 52
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I've been known to ask boys out too, I mean... Why to wait around when you see something you want? But I'd prefer it if the boys did all the asking.
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lmcwil
Apr 11, 2007, 8:39 PM
Post #48 of 52
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I can't remember for sure if I've ever asked a guy out, point-blank. But I've delivered some strong enough hints that they were picked up on, or I maneuvered the conversation so that they guy would ask for my number (yes, we of the feminine kind do tend to have a knack for manipulating....) BUT, that said- I'm pretty reticent when it comes to asking a guy out, for the simple reason that, if a guy doesn't have enough chutzpah to make the first move, it seems doubtful that he's the kind of guy i'd be interested in. this ties in to an earlier post somebody made- if it was just something small like coffee or a probable one-time date, i might make the first move but in general, if it's a situation where I'm interested in getting into a serious long-term relationship, i would definitely want the guy to instigate moving things to the next level.
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atg200
Apr 23, 2007, 2:20 AM
Post #49 of 52
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For what its worth, my wife more or less asked me out. We seem to be doing okay.
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traddad
Apr 23, 2007, 7:09 PM
Post #50 of 52
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atg200 wrote: For what its worth, my wife more or less asked me out. We seem to be doing okay. Ditto. She popped the question, too. Eight years and a beautiful daughter later and I wouldn't have it any other way. Do you know how traditional and "un-equal" it seems to depend on the guy to do the asking (and also run the risk of getting shut down)? Besides, life is too short (and good people in too short a supply) to stand on tradition. Take the risk. Sorry to butt in but I saw the subject and had to post. I have one X chromosome....does that count?
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