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pinktricam
Apr 8, 2008, 5:16 PM
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Registered: Jan 8, 2003
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A Mexican family was considering putting their grandfather (Abuelo) in a nursing home. All the Hispanic facilities were completely full so they had to put him in an Italian home. After a few weeks in the Italian facility, they came to visit Grandpa. How do you like it here?' asks the grandson. It's wonderful! Everyone here is so courteous and respectful, says grandpa. We're so happy for you. We were worried that this was the wrong place for you. You know, since you are a little different from everyone.'Oh, no! Let me tell you about how wonderfully they treat the residents. Abuelo says with a big smile. 'There's a musician here -- he's 85 years old. He hasn't played the violin in 20 years and everyone still calls him 'Maestro'!' 'There is a judge in here -- he's 95 years old. He hasn't been on the bench in 30 years and everyone still calls him 'Your Honor'!' 'There's a dentist here -- 90 years old. He hasn't fixed a tooth for 25 years and everyone still calls him Doctor?!' And me -- I haven't had sex for 35 years and they still call me 'The Fucking Mexican'
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wjca
Apr 8, 2008, 7:39 PM
Post #2 of 10
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Registered: Jan 27, 2005
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Nice. You know any good pollock jokes? What about black jokes? Those are always pretty good.
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jmvc
Apr 10, 2008, 4:51 PM
Post #3 of 10
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wjca wrote: Nice. You know any good pollock jokes? What about black jokes? Those are always pretty good.
SJW(Sick Joke Warning)
What does a leper do when hanging around at the belay?
(drumroll)
Play Tetris!
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jmvc
Apr 10, 2008, 4:57 PM
Post #4 of 10
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And a joke with nuns in it for ptc:
A policeman watches from afar as two nuns on a sportsbike come quickly nearer to him, really pushing the envelope on the bends..
As he watches, they go through a hairpin bend with a cliff on the outside at about 100mph.
His mind still reeling from the distortion of the laws of physics he has just seen, he pulls them in.
"How the hell did you manage that corner without killing yourselves?" he asks.
"God rides with us" says one of the nuns.
"Right, I'm fining you for being three on a motorbike"
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slablizard
Apr 10, 2008, 5:06 PM
Post #5 of 10
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Registered: Oct 13, 2003
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jmvc wrote: La unica iglesia que ilumina es la que arde.
**The only enligthing church is the one that is burning in flames**
love that..who wrote it?
(This post was edited by slablizard on Apr 10, 2008, 5:09 PM)
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boadman
Apr 10, 2008, 7:22 PM
Post #6 of 10
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Registered: Oct 7, 2003
Posts: 726
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How did I know that this wasn't going to be funny before I opened the post?
pinktricam wrote: A Mexican family was considering putting their grandfather (Abuelo) in a nursing home. All the Hispanic facilities were completely full so they had to put him in an Italian home. After a few weeks in the Italian facility, they came to visit Grandpa. How do you like it here?' asks the grandson. It's wonderful! Everyone here is so courteous and respectful, says grandpa. We're so happy for you. We were worried that this was the wrong place for you. You know, since you are a little different from everyone.'Oh, no! Let me tell you about how wonderfully they treat the residents. Abuelo says with a big smile. 'There's a musician here -- he's 85 years old. He hasn't played the violin in 20 years and everyone still calls him 'Maestro'!' 'There is a judge in here -- he's 95 years old. He hasn't been on the bench in 30 years and everyone still calls him 'Your Honor'!' 'There's a dentist here -- 90 years old. He hasn't fixed a tooth for 25 years and everyone still calls him Doctor?!' And me -- I haven't had sex for 35 years and they still call me 'The Fucking Mexican' |
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jmvc
Apr 11, 2008, 9:46 AM
Post #7 of 10
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Registered: Sep 10, 2007
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slablizard wrote: jmvc wrote: La unica iglesia que ilumina es la que arde. **The only enligthing church is the one that is burning in flames** love that..who wrote it?
I've completely forgotten where I got that from.. A quick google has not given any clue as to the original author either..
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pinktricam
Apr 11, 2008, 11:13 AM
Post #8 of 10
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boadman wrote: How did I know that this wasn't going to be funny before I opened the post?
Feel free to use it. I've been getting a lot of milage out of it. I think it helps if you use a thick spanish accent, which I do well. Enjoy!
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traddad
Apr 11, 2008, 2:09 PM
Post #9 of 10
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Registered: Dec 14, 2001
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pinktricam wrote: boadman wrote: How did I know that this wasn't going to be funny before I opened the post? Feel free to use it. I've been getting a lot of milage out of it. I think it helps if you use a thick spanish accent, which I do well. Enjoy!
Mods,
Can we get a special hateful little jingoistic, gay baiting troll icon to afix to all of Pinky's posts.
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pinktricam
Apr 11, 2008, 4:28 PM
Post #10 of 10
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Registered: Jan 8, 2003
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I just told it to a CNA on 7D and she laughed out loud...though it may just have been the accent. She thought the accent was pretty good.
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