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mreardon


Mar 23, 2004, 5:21 PM
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Bible says I can have a slave
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As a registered Republican, I've decided to move further to the right and understand my newfound bible politics. But I have some questions:

Leviticus 25:44 states: "Your male and female slaves are to come from the nations around you; from them you may buy slaves."

1. Does this include Canadians?
2. If I move to Mexico and want to purchase the Olsen's to be my slaves, do I have to wait until they are 18?
3. Does the ocean act as a barrier from buying an Australian?


Partner tradman


Mar 23, 2004, 5:25 PM
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Re: Bible says I can have a slave [In reply to]
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Are you an Israelite, or at least a Jew? If not, no problem, I've got a swiss army knife wround here someplace, I can have at least part of you looking Jewish in no time....


curt


Mar 23, 2004, 5:25 PM
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I have an Australian Cattle Dog but it doesn't obey me and therefore makes a crappy slave. :D

Curt


mountainchick82


Mar 23, 2004, 5:28 PM
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I had an Australian and he was great until the novelty wore off


mreardon


Mar 23, 2004, 5:31 PM
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In reply to:
Are you an Israelite, or at least a Jew? If not, no problem, I've got a swiss army knife wround here someplace, I can have at least part of you looking Jewish in no time....

I married jewish and my wife took 20% off.


Partner tradman


Mar 23, 2004, 5:40 PM
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Ooof. I'd love to have a nine-inch dick, but I'm not cutting off six inches for anyone.


Partner rrrADAM


Mar 23, 2004, 6:00 PM
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That's the Old Testemant brutha Mike, which is Rev 1.0. The New Testemant (Rev 2.0) is the current revision of this religeon.

It also says an "eye for an eye", but I think if you poke me in the eye, I would sock you in the mouth... Or maybe just cry. :lol:


skiclimb


Mar 23, 2004, 6:40 PM
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I'd say the gospels are rev 2.0 and the epistles are 2.1

2.0 contains original source code (only 2 rules) and seems to be the best benchmark.


wildtrail


Mar 23, 2004, 6:46 PM
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Hey, the Bible says a lot of things, most contradictory. Thou shalt not kill, yet, there is a lot of killing in that book, isn't there? :wink:

Who's to argue with religion, though? After all, it is the truth. :roll:

I want two slaves? Does it say I can have two? I need one (a redhead) for the maid's outfit and one (a blonde) for the nurse's outfit. Can I have two?


climbersoze


Mar 23, 2004, 6:55 PM
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Why not go for the hat trick, dude.

Brunette - maid
Blonde - Nurse
Redhead - cheerleader

"And my first decree unto my slaves... though shalt be bathed nightly, amongst yourselves, in a frivolous display of Mr. Bubble.

Afterwards... the spankings.. for all that have been naughty. And you have been oh so naughty"


mreardon


Mar 23, 2004, 6:56 PM
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That's the Old Testemant brutha Mike, which is Rev 1.0. The New Testemant (Rev 2.0) is the current revision of this religeon.

It also says an "eye for an eye", but I think if you poke me in the eye, I would sock you in the mouth... Or maybe just cry. :lol:

I just figured that with all this religious fever going on, and with everyone turning a blind eye to the president, after all - you either are with him, or you completely agree with the terrorists - hey look, a boob! - that now was the right time to learn about the bible.

Most people claim the bible doesn't like gays. Figured if we're gonna' follow that rule, let's check out some other fun ones. :D

This is only the sad beginning.... :wink:


danooguy


Mar 23, 2004, 6:58 PM
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I know where we can get beaten by a young lady for $50. Does that count?


climbersoze


Mar 23, 2004, 6:59 PM
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I know where we can get beaten by a young lady for $50. Does that count?

Get married... then you can get beaten for free :shock:


djmeat


Mar 23, 2004, 7:00 PM
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I'm a brunette :wink:

http://www.complexnightclub.com/assets/images/Maid.gif


wishiwaswest


Mar 23, 2004, 7:01 PM
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In reply to:
As a registered Republican, I've decided to move further to the right and understand my newfound bible politics. But I have some questions:

Leviticus 25:44 states: "Your male and female slaves are to come from the nations around you; from them you may buy slaves."

Hmmmmm - does this mean I have to free my kids?


Partner philbox
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Mar 23, 2004, 9:50 PM
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In reply to:
3. Does the ocean act as a barrier from buying an Australian?

Massah, Massa, don`t beat me massa. Put the whip away Mike, I`ll be a good slave.


mcheshi


Mar 23, 2004, 10:26 PM
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That's the Old Testemant brutha Mike, which is Rev 1.0. The New Testemant (Rev 2.0) is the current revision of this religeon.

It also says an "eye for an eye", but I think if you poke me in the eye, I would sock you in the mouth... Or maybe just cry. :lol:

and eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, so what about eye teeth?


wishiwaswest


Mar 23, 2004, 10:29 PM
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In reply to:
In reply to:
That's the Old Testemant brutha Mike, which is Rev 1.0. The New Testemant (Rev 2.0) is the current revision of this religeon.

It also says an "eye for an eye", but I think if you poke me in the eye, I would sock you in the mouth... Or maybe just cry. :lol:

and eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, so what about eye teeth?

Personally, I already gave those away for a date with my mailman -


mcheshi


Mar 23, 2004, 10:31 PM
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In reply to:
Personally, I already gave those away for a date with my mailman -

mine are currently 'embraced' so to speak...


donie


Mar 23, 2004, 10:40 PM
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mchesi, i think your a guy (MIKE right)?
don't bother replying to your query.
all good in the hood


mcheshi


Mar 23, 2004, 10:43 PM
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In reply to:
mchesi, i think your a guy (MIKE right)?
don't bother replying to your query.
all good in the hood
\
not mike... mieke.. accent on the last e... not a guy


donie


Mar 23, 2004, 10:47 PM
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ok i believe you :D


mreardon


Mar 23, 2004, 11:44 PM
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In reply to:
In reply to:
3. Does the ocean act as a barrier from buying an Australian?

Massah, Massa, don`t beat me massa. Put the whip away Mike, I`ll be a good slave.

Damn, you found my motive. :D


justsendingits


Mar 24, 2004, 2:19 PM
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Re: Bible says I can have a slave [In reply to]
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I thought if you read the bible you ARE the slave?


wildtrail


Mar 24, 2004, 2:25 PM
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In reply to:
Why not go for the hat trick, dude.

Brunette - maid
Blonde - Nurse
Redhead - cheerleader

Good idea!

Can I have three slaves? :D

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