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sassinesuss
Oct 10, 2004, 12:47 AM
Post #51 of 212
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In reply to: My exwife was into climbing, a little. Problem was she ALWAYS wanted to come along and it got frustrating having to literally babysit her on these routes. I know I sound like an ass but there were times I wanted to go without her to push my limits and that of my partner. She would have fits about not wanting her there. Its tough when you S.O. is climbing 2 number grades below you. I have climbed with women at for almost 2 years my partners were 2 girls. I almost prefer climbing with females at times. hard to explain My current G.F. has no interest in climbing and its our little time apart from each other. As long as it not TOO much time apart :wink:
Good PC answer there... particularly when I'm one of the 2 girl partners you had (I could be both... are you counting both personalities?) ((hehheh))
Met my ex through a mutual climbing partner/friend. We did a lot of our climbing together while together (3 yrs.) but I still understood he wanted to go climbing with his other partners too.. and vice-versa. I think a lot of that is communication. But, I'll admit he was hard on me (he's a more advanced alpinist) ... we had our fair share of arguments. It blurred a lot of lines in the "relationship", "partnership" and him being a "mentor" at times. As I gained experience a lot of that cleared up, just like it would with a new partner. It's hard to find your rythym together. But, he openly admited he wouldn't want to go with me on difficult/dangerous routes, not necessarily because of my experience but because of him being too concerned about my safety and not able to seperate himself if necessary. Refer to the Touching the Void thread if you need to. :) (climbing had nothing to do with the demise of our relationship, fyi. And i would actually prefer to meet another climber vs. a non-climber. if anyone is taking a poll.)
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braaaaaaaadley
Oct 10, 2004, 2:13 AM
Post #52 of 212
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In reply to: Guys THINK they want a girlfriend who climbs. They also THINK they want a girlfriend who kayaks, bikes and tele skis. Because that's HOT.
I don't think I want a girl who climbs.......tele ski's. I know. Nothing would make me more happy then to share a long b/c tour with a special someone... my only prob is I have never seen another tele skiier besides myself :cry: . But you did make a good point about the whole jelousy thing. IMO it would be good (but painful in a way) if you cought the girl cheating b/c then at least you would find out that she is unfaithful now vs. later when things get serious.
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liam
Oct 10, 2004, 3:42 AM
Post #53 of 212
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Registered: Jun 12, 2004
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:? So if I dont ask her(ie hit on her) How do I find out if she likes me. Go ask her freinds, thats sooooo high school. Search for those subtle clues, ok..im thick. I usually miss those clues. Hmmmm...perhaps just say. Im willing to be your belay biiiatchhh.
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climbingnomad
Oct 10, 2004, 4:16 AM
Post #54 of 212
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Registered: Sep 29, 2004
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[olive]Well this thread has so far been fully entertaining! So here are my two cents, take 'em or leave 'em.
As I was reading through this thread there was a post by a girl (you said you were 18 and tired of being hit on by your male company), two things: 1) Be flattered that they find you appealing. But if they cross a line that makes you feel uncomfortable tell them straight up. We don't give men enough credit, they take criticism much better then we women do.
2) You made a VERY valid point; it is much easier for them to find a new partner then it is for us. So guys please respect that sometimes like you we just want to push the limit and "GIVER".
As for what I think about this discussion...
Another girl hit the nail on the head when she said that men tend to say they want a gf that hikes/camps/paddles/climbs/etc but as a girl that does I have found that to be a bit untrue. Yah at first men (especially non-climbers) find it sexy, till they see that you are able to take care of yourself. Trust me I get that we all want to feel needed and teaching someone a new skill is great but when a woman can handle her shit a lot of men run for the nearest damsel in distress.
ADVICE TO THE MEN (should you want to take it):
Just because we do not need you to open doors for us or take care of us doesn't mean that we don't appreciate a strong man, who appreciates that we are strong women.[/olive]
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anykineclimb
Oct 10, 2004, 5:02 AM
Post #55 of 212
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In reply to: Good PC answer there... particularly when I'm one of the 2 girl partners you had (I could be both... are you counting both personalities?) ((hehheh))
BOTH?? We're being a little conservative aren't we??
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climbtothebeet
Oct 10, 2004, 5:03 AM
Post #56 of 212
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just think, you and your wife go out on long backpacking trips, watch sun rises and sun sets, walkunderwaterfalls, play in the snow, climb int eh mountians, share a 2person sleepingbag, getting stinky together.........................................good times ahead if u got a girl that do that stuff
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mburke225
Oct 10, 2004, 5:23 AM
Post #57 of 212
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When I was young we called them hybrids...a good looking girl you could take outdoors.
Now that I have been in the game longer, I have found one. Just don't pretend that relationships get any less complicated. Things get mixed up when you combine what you wish you had with what you have.
And don't expect any pity from the community.
Oh, and get good at giving back rubs, climbing brings on a lot of sore muscles. And she will know you have strong hands.
All advice given on experience...yours may differ.
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packclimber
Oct 10, 2004, 5:47 AM
Post #58 of 212
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I've had a g/f that I convinced to go climbing with me. At first I loved it, I had someone to climb with. But she wasn't the greatest belayer most of the time she dropped me. So I either belayed myself or my regular partner belayed for me. She didn't understand why it had to be that way. Another thing she did was complain anytime I went climbing with my partner and left her at home.
Hell if I a date a girl and shes a good and SAFE climber you bet.
I'm a simple person All I ask is that she climbs with me every once in a while.
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climbs4fun
Moderator
Oct 10, 2004, 6:04 AM
Post #59 of 212
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The only comment I keep seeing that I disagree with is that some of you say you tend to be too worried about her safety. What's to say that she doesn't climb on your level and would make an equal partner. My bf and I climb together and he's an emergency doctor, but still doesn't get very protectice when we climb together. Part of that is because we climb pretty much on the same level.
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kafish
Oct 10, 2004, 6:39 AM
Post #60 of 212
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Well I guess I am in a different boat than any other post so far. My girlfriend got me climbing. Honestly being with a climber has its good and bad. Its cool she taught me how to climb and that she is down to go out and camp/hike/climb/stink/eat horible food. I find the biggest issue is learning to communicate as a partner and not as a boyfriend and seperating climbing and the relationship. Lets be honest the attitudes and issues of a relationship should not present themselves in your climbing partner but when those people are one in the same it gets rough. I love my girlfriend/ climbing partner but there needs to be patience, respect, communication, and when needed climbing days with other people.
Also the previous comment on back rubs could not be more true. It is ok though because it goes both ways.
Also she was leading 5.11 when we first met and I was just getting started so that was pretty awesome in my book. I also know from all that she is great partner, can lead pretty hard, clean, smart, safe. Can't beat her.
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joshklingbeil
Oct 10, 2004, 9:12 AM
Post #61 of 212
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Registered: Jul 6, 2002
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Sure if she leads 5.11 trad. Ok 5.9 will do. What would you girls think if your b/f is going on a week long climbing trip in the High Sierra with some chick. Hummm I wonder if this would cause some tenstion ? Trad girls are hardcore..... 8^)
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dgkula
Oct 10, 2004, 11:09 AM
Post #62 of 212
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Registered: May 6, 2004
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Most definitely. My g/f had shoes and a harness when we met and we spend several free weekends/month climbing together. I'm leading 5.8/9 and she can only follow 5.7 so it does limit what we can climb somewhat ...
Rather have her climbing and having fun together than b*&ching about speanding weekends apart (been there, done that).
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adnix
Oct 10, 2004, 12:06 PM
Post #63 of 212
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Registered: May 20, 2003
Posts: 584
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In reply to: Guys are psyched at having an adventure girlfriend, until she makes a plan to go climb with one of her many guy friends she met while adventuring. Who she knew WELL BEFORE she met the boyfriend. |
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nikegirl
Oct 10, 2004, 1:25 PM
Post #64 of 212
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Registered: Sep 2, 2001
Posts: 5662
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Each relationship,as well as person is different.
Be it circumstances, age...logistics.
Relationships are give and take...balance.
When I started climbing, like most, I was obsessed.
I climbed 3-4-5 days a week.
Ate slept drank climbing.
I met my mate, climbing and thru this site.
We had a long distance relationship, hardest thing I've ever had to endure.
Before climbing, maybe kickboxing/and yoga or snowboarding was all I knew of athletics or outdoors activity,before we met.
Since he and I've been together, it just gets better.
The things we've done include:
kayaking
snow camping
snow shoeing
day hiking
extended days of pack/hiking
climbing/hiking trips across country and the world
free-diving
body-board/ surfing
Canyoneering
I worried, that I was or might be the "girl" some of you speak of...
date, and do...then fade away. Am I doing this because I making myself into what he wanted?? Do I like, enjoy? these incredible feats I try.
I now can say no.
I love what we've learned together...
But, quite honistly each time we do something,
I have this euphoric feeling...be it the view, smells,travels...endurance, or our talks, even the silence. At the end of EVERY trip, I'm proud of myself.
ME. My accomplishment. But, the greatest thing is that we do it TOGETHER.
Would I feel that feeling of euphoria alone? yes. But it truly is the best with Robert.
He does things outside of me, I'm now okay with that. Respect/communication as we go thru time, makes trust and anxt slowly dissapate.
I love what I can do. I love we can do together.
We live in the same area now, and I am so blessed to live in the Northwest. One hour from the beach,one way...Mt. Hood the other, turn left and the Columbia River Gorge...Vantage, as a day trip...then Smith Rock 2+ hours away....
And THE GREATEST Partner, that anyone could want...when you KNOW this...long distance SUCKED for us both...BIG time.
Just check in with yourself, be true to what you really like in a person.
Self discovery is better that way.
I had no idea what i missed in life, until I tried, shared and discovered in the Adventuring he showed me. It's a way of life. It just is. I love that.
~T
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andy_reagan
Oct 10, 2004, 2:29 PM
Post #65 of 212
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Do I want my wife to climb? Hell no...who would be in the kitchen to fix me dinner when I get home? :lol:
Kiddings of course.
Serious answer: I've found through my little (read very little) experience the key to finding a serious partner is to not attach any modifiers to the partner finding process. In the end, this mindset will produce a more harmonious connection than that of, "Wow she rock climbs?! We must be a perfect match!" Take it as ye will.
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jfclimber88
Oct 10, 2004, 2:33 PM
Post #66 of 212
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Registered: Sep 27, 2004
Posts: 30
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Maybe we females should be asking that question as well.. DO Girl Climbers want a Bf that climbs too??? In my opinion.. Yeah, if you have things in common besides climbing thats even better.. I mean you can't expect to have a relationship based totally on the fact that the two of you can scale a wall...
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elf
Oct 10, 2004, 3:05 PM
Post #67 of 212
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Registered: Oct 10, 2004
Posts: 11
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:D It would be the best of both worlds
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adnix
Oct 10, 2004, 3:53 PM
Post #68 of 212
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Registered: May 20, 2003
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A non-climber will have hard time when I'm travelling extensively. But another climber usually wants to come with me (without being a drag)... so who wouldn't prefer a girl who climbs?
I ain't going to cut down on climbing or travelling in order to please someone.
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greyicewater
Oct 11, 2004, 12:46 AM
Post #69 of 212
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Registered: Dec 8, 2003
Posts: 419
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i've been with a climbing chica... she was great. it was actually the best relationship that i have ever been in. we shared everything together. never got into one argument, besides joking around. she was amazing... but in the end i messed it all up... as usual...
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sabu
Oct 11, 2004, 2:07 AM
Post #70 of 212
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Registered: Aug 14, 2004
Posts: 51
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my g/f and I are both very addicted to climbing and it has to be the best thing ever. by far the best dates we've been on have been the climbing ones, good company and good climbing = one very perfect day. it gives us a huge common ground as well as the other things we share in common and it so much fun to share that awsome climb with some one special. of course climbing is not a pre-requisit for me but it's nice to have.
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kachoong
Oct 11, 2004, 5:04 AM
Post #71 of 212
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Registered: Jan 23, 2004
Posts: 15304
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In reply to: Each relationship,as well as person is different. Be it circumstances, age...logistics. Relationships are give and take...balance. When I started climbing, like most, I was obsessed. I climbed 3-4-5 days a week. Ate slept drank climbing. I met my mate, climbing and thru this site. We had a long distance relationship, hardest thing I've ever had to endure. Before climbing, maybe kickboxing/and yoga or snowboarding was all I knew of athletics or outdoors activity,before we met. Since he and I've been together, it just gets better. The things we've done include: kayaking snow camping snow shoeing day hiking extended days of pack/hiking climbing/hiking trips across country and the world free-diving body-board/ surfing Canyoneering I worried, that I was or might be the "girl" some of you speak of... date, and do...then fade away. Am I doing this because I making myself into what he wanted?? Do I like, enjoy? these incredible feats I try. I now can say no. I love what we've learned together... But, quite honistly each time we do something, I have this euphoric feeling...be it the view, smells,travels...endurance, or our talks, even the silence. At the end of EVERY trip, I'm proud of myself. ME. My accomplishment. But, the greatest thing is that we do it TOGETHER. Would I feel that feeling of euphoria alone? yes. But it truly is the best with Robert. He does things outside of me, I'm now okay with that. Respect/communication as we go thru time, makes trust and anxt slowly dissapate. I love what I can do. I love we can do together. We live in the same area now, and I am so blessed to live in the Northwest. One hour from the beach,one way...Mt. Hood the other, turn left and the Columbia River Gorge...Vantage, as a day trip...then Smith Rock 2+ hours away.... And THE GREATEST Partner, that anyone could want...when you KNOW this...long distance SUCKED for us both...BIG time. Just check in with yourself, be true to what you really like in a person. Self discovery is better that way. I had no idea what i missed in life, until I tried, shared and discovered in the Adventuring he showed me. It's a way of life. It just is. I love that. ~T
....I know where you're coming from about the long distance thing.... glad to hear you found a way to bring yourselves together....
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mintcondish
Oct 11, 2004, 6:41 AM
Post #72 of 212
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Registered: Dec 30, 2003
Posts: 58
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i get jealous when i see a couple climbing together. my gf doesnt like climbing as much nor does she have the will to push herself. when i go to the gym i see the climber girls and i think its attractive to see them graciously make their way up a boulder. i hope my gf isnt reading this!
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mintcondish
Oct 11, 2004, 6:42 AM
Post #73 of 212
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Registered: Dec 30, 2003
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i get jealous when i see a couple climbing together. my gf doesnt like climbing as much nor does she have the will to push herself. when i go to the gym i see the climber girls and i think its attractive to see them graciously make their way up a boulder. i hope my gf isnt reading this!
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bmcalli
Oct 11, 2004, 9:09 AM
Post #74 of 212
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Registered: Aug 10, 2003
Posts: 10
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YES!!! PM me pleeeeeeeeeessssssseeeeeeeeee.......
(Pathetic, I know)
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shock
Oct 11, 2004, 9:34 AM
Post #75 of 212
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Registered: Feb 10, 2004
Posts: 103
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I'm nuts about climbing, i never shut up about it. so if i had a gf who didnt like climbing she'd kill me cause i wouldnt stop talking about it or going off for weekends climbing. I couldnt see a relationship with someone who hates climbing lasting for me unless she was really special.
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