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organic
Aug 8, 2003, 1:58 PM
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...V8 is a tough boulder problem not a drink.
...sex goes like this 'on mount', 'mount on', 'hard', 'hard on'!
...you've tried to climb the side of your house.
...the only rubber protection you use is C4.
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cthcrockclimber
Aug 8, 2003, 2:18 PM
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you prefeer D's to A's when it comes to grades.
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crankenstein
Aug 8, 2003, 2:47 PM
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Your vocabulary could be misunderstood by some, i.e.:
"Good protection" has nothing to do with sex
"Flash" has nothing to do with exposing your privates
"Exposed" has nothing to do with flashing your privates
"Nuts" has nothing to do with your privates
I'm sure that there are many more...
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bdawg
Aug 8, 2003, 2:48 PM
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In reply to: ...the only rubber protection you use is C4.
LMFAO
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bdawg
Aug 8, 2003, 3:08 PM
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...You know how to get on your roof without a ladder
...You begin buying your shoes 2 sizes too small out of habit
...You aerate your lawn with your crampons
...Your climbing equipment is worth more than your car
...You placed anchors on the side of your 5th story apartment building so you could sleep on your porta-ledge on the weekdays.
...You look at every vertical surface you see as a potential climb.
...You have ever clipped a 3 ounce set of keys to your belt with a 25 kn. carabiner
...You say your girlfriend has a great rack and your not referring to her bust size
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climbingbum
Aug 8, 2003, 3:12 PM
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.........your super excited to see a Crack, especially if you haven't had one in awhile.
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rockmx
Aug 8, 2003, 3:26 PM
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you put you boss on hold because you have a call from you climbing partner to plan the next climbing trip.
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coldclimb
Aug 8, 2003, 4:49 PM
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...your bed is no longer slept in because you need somewhere to sort your gear.
...your C4 does not explode violently.
..."bomber" is not a noun.
...old rusted chunks of metal and wires are keepsakes, because they were booty.
...you get confused when someone says they're rapping gifts for somebody.
..."sending" something does not involve the USPS, UPS, or Fed-Ex.
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epic_ed
Aug 8, 2003, 5:05 PM
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- You miss work on Monday because you epic-ed on Sunday.
- You're behind on your bills because you spent your paycheck on more gear.
- You rack is worth more than your house. (worth more than your car? that's a light weight rack)
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howdidshedothat
Aug 8, 2003, 5:16 PM
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-you sleep with your climbing shoes
-you go to reach for your chalk bag when you go to lift something... and it's there!
-When you hear Royal Arches, and you don't think of food
-you mark the middle of all your ropes that are not for climbing
-sex is not rated good, ok or great, but 5.8 , 5.10....
-the only books you own are gudes to climbs.
-You plan your vacations on where there is killer climbing
:P
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joegoesup
Aug 8, 2003, 5:29 PM
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You wear your harness to work and and yell TAKE when you get to the top of the elevator shaft.
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bdawg
Aug 8, 2003, 5:45 PM
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you don't walk down stairs, your rappel them
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cthcrockclimber
Aug 8, 2003, 5:47 PM
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haha, this thread was great, just what i need today at work. :D
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cbeltrano
Aug 8, 2003, 5:54 PM
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....you tie your neck tie with a figure 8 knot
....you can wake up a 6:00 am on saturday on 4 hours sleep to drive 3 hours climb all day drive 3 hours back and drink the night away but waking up at 8:00 on monday morning to get to work for 9:00 is cruel and unheard of
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longalong
Aug 8, 2003, 5:56 PM
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In reply to: You wear your harness to work and and yell TAKE when you get to the top of the elevator shaft.
Wow, I don't think you'd be called a climber. I'm pretty sure you'd be called 'Special'.
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joegoesup
Aug 8, 2003, 6:02 PM
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Thanks, my mommy always told me I was special. 8)
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xkyczar
Aug 8, 2003, 6:07 PM
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Not feeling very imaginative today so I'll link to someone else's.
http://www.aae.uiuc.edu/~kabrown3/climbhumor.html
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markanite
Aug 8, 2003, 6:22 PM
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... you have bouldered your office disk more times then u can remember! (I have a strange disk ... its in a v shape and has an elaborate overhang due to numerous shelfs .. a good v2)
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bdawg
Aug 8, 2003, 6:29 PM
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if you crimp and pull up on every door jam you walk under.
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baalzimon
Aug 8, 2003, 6:34 PM
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Funniest:
In reply to: you go to reach for your chalk bag when you go to lift something... and it's there!
Most Commonly Done:
In reply to: You look at every vertical surface you see as a potential climb |
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howdidshedothat
Aug 8, 2003, 6:35 PM
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You drop something at work and yell...Rock
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petsfed
Aug 8, 2003, 6:35 PM
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In reply to: ....you can wake up a 6:00 am on saturday on 4 hours sleep to drive 3 hours climb all day drive 3 hours back and drink the night away but waking up at 8:00 on monday morning to get to work for 9:00 is cruel and unheard of
Sad but true.
...you can make a meal with a bag of macaroni and some mayonaise.
...you have lived off said maca-naise for weeks to pay for gear.
...if you can think of reasonable additions to this list.
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watersprite
Aug 8, 2003, 6:50 PM
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In reply to: you mark the middle of all your ropes that are not for climbing
and what would those be used for - hmmmm?????
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climbingjunky
Aug 8, 2003, 7:17 PM
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You started your own climbing forum even though RC.com already exists and kicks ass and most of the posts are made by you! And you have spiderman as your avatar climbing a wall and your friends think you're a freak. :roll:
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justuspr
Aug 8, 2003, 7:33 PM
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In reply to: ...you can make a meal with a bag of macaroni and some mayonaise. ...you have lived off said maca-naise for weeks to pay for gear.
Never used macaroni, but I lived off of boiled potatoes, mayo and some salt and peper, 3 meals a day for almost a month... the cubboards and fridge were completely empty :)
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hollywoodcragmonkey
Aug 8, 2003, 7:36 PM
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You live in Los Angeles, have white powder residue all over your clothes, and you're not a producer.
Your girlfriend lives on the sixth floor of her building and you keep forgetting her door code... on purpose.
You have had to get rings resized to accomidate "finger biceps" you didn't have before.
You surf the porn sights looking for women with long shoulder lines and ripped backs. :twisted:
You have considered taking your dog to obidience school so he'll stop wimpering when you go too high up.
You have thought to inquire as to whether or not REI has a wedding registry.
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bdawg
Aug 8, 2003, 7:38 PM
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thanks hollywoodcragmonkey, by far the best post yet.
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alonfw
Aug 8, 2003, 7:46 PM
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You have ACTUALLY inquired if REI has a wedding registry (They Do!)
Alon :)
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organic
Aug 8, 2003, 10:19 PM
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...you introduce your girlfriend/wife as your belay partner
...you liked that scrunched up toe feeling
...you think chalk is the answer to everything duct tape isn't
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corpse
Aug 8, 2003, 11:20 PM
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In reply to: ...you think chalk is the answer to everything duct tape isn't
oh, this is so me!
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collegekid
Aug 9, 2003, 12:54 AM
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you might be a climber if...
you climb stuff
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no_limit
Aug 9, 2003, 1:05 AM
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In reply to: you might be a climber if... you climb stuff
HA HA HA HA HAAAAA
not funny
hee hee hee :D
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podunkclimber
Aug 9, 2003, 1:39 AM
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...saying "nice jugs" won't get you slapped.
...your climbing gear is the only stuff you own that is neatly put away, and organized.
...you mark your pens at work with colored tape.
...the scent of sweat, and chalk gets you excited.
...using harnesses, and rope with your significant other has nothing to do with BD.
...you've used a static line, and acsender to clean out your gutters.
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xanx
Aug 9, 2003, 1:44 AM
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...you have one of those "falling" dreams and on your way down you scope out the cliff to see if it will go.
...you seriously considered turning down Dartmouth to live with your parents forever and climb and then live off their inheritance when they die.
...you have memorized every move on every problem in every video you have (including the 1+ gig of vids from the internet).
...you are a 17 year old boy and instead of searching for porn at 1AM, you search for pictures of Gunks classics like the Buddah at 1AM.
...you just added a low start to your "Honda Oddysey" project (and it goes at around V4).
...you can scratch yourself with just your fingers, without using the nails at all.
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ikefromla
Aug 9, 2003, 3:49 AM
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...you've ever been banned from a theatre for climbing to the top of the marquie.
...you're willing to risk an arrest to climb a two-pitch hotel tower.
...you've regressed to chair bouldering in class because you can't just NOT CLIMB any longer.
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collegekid
Aug 9, 2003, 6:26 AM
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i like to climb stuff
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collegekid
Aug 9, 2003, 6:44 AM
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oh, and "...you can scratch yourself with just your fingers, without using the nails at all." .....true, true
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sharpender
Aug 9, 2003, 7:50 AM
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The thing you want most in a new girlfriend is a set of nuts
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tradmanclimbs
Aug 9, 2003, 3:44 PM
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You just might be a climber if.......
the ice on the inside of your fridge is impaled with an ice screw to hold the biner that is your bottle opener 8)
you have ever traversed the icicles on the eves of your house with ice tools and crampons :D (not recomended with vynal sideing)
you have ever rigged a top rope from the bell tower of your dads church :roll:
you have to lie to your girlfrind to cover up your soloing habbit instead of your crack habbit :shock:
you use old climbing rope and a vw buss for logging :roll:
you sleep in the buss more nights than in the house 8)
you climb more days a year than you work :D
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iridesantacruz
Aug 9, 2003, 6:26 PM
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........while working out and putting your feet against something ur friends say "man it looks like ur gripping that to never let go"
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anykineclimb
Aug 9, 2003, 7:18 PM
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....its ok to talk about sliding your hand up a greasy crack.
....food tastes better with chalk on it.
....your coffe cup at work has a sling attached with duct tape.
....its perfectly fine to hang out, half naked and in some sort of bondage gear, with a bunch of guys.
....you don't get in trouble for staring at someones butt for hours.
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petsfed
Aug 9, 2003, 7:56 PM
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In reply to: you have to lie to your girlfrind to cover up your soloing habbit instead of your crack habbit
My partner's like that. Whenever she finds out she just goes nuts on him. Its always worth a laugh.
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eltusko
Aug 9, 2003, 9:48 PM
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You'll convince a buddy to be your belay slut for the day and hike 4 miles with 40 pounds worth of chit in your pack to some cliff that doesn't exist cause you overheard a logger in a bar talking about this big thing back in the woods that he almost fell off.
also, you compete with your friends to see how many doors in your dorm you can drytool before you fall or tear the frame apart
or, whenever your boss asks you something that could possibly be related to a thread on this infernal site, you go into it in depth and make him realize what you're really doing at work all day
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climbingpope
Aug 9, 2003, 11:03 PM
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I have to say this is the best thread i have ever read on here. but sadly i am not creative enough to think of anymore. oH well life goes on.
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memphis_rea
Aug 10, 2003, 12:00 AM
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You consider and plan out how to make ur bus into a climbing cave for those days you can't get out
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warranty_wizard
Aug 10, 2003, 12:18 AM
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if you've turned your garage into a home climbing gym. like my own
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climbingpride
Aug 10, 2003, 12:37 AM
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Sorry but here is another link, some of them have already been done but they have plent of lines only climber would laugh at.
http://www.gdargaud.net/...Climber.html#MightBe
You might be a climber if:
--Reading these makes you feel "normal".
--When you hear the word "Climax" refering to a point in a story you perk up thinking somone said "Climbmax" the local gym.
*guilty of both. :roll:
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trad_man
Aug 10, 2003, 1:06 AM
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You've ever frozen your lips to an ice screw trying to blow an ice plug at your partner.
hahahahahahahaha bout fell outa my chair laughin...thx xkyczar :lol: :lol: :lol:
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roseraie
Aug 10, 2003, 1:26 AM
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Your roommate stops commenting when you disappear while she's in the shower and don't come home for days at a time.
You spend three evenings cleaning the crap out from the storage place under the stairs so you can campus them.
You ask your dad if you can bolt your parents' sandstone fireplace.
A good Saturday night is spent climbing the side of a house with ice axes and then traversing the stones inset in the swimming pool.
Not only is your Nalgene scratched and covered in climbing stickers, but the stickers are so sun-bleached that you can't tell what they say.
It doesn't make sense to unpack your car, because you're just going to go on another climbing trip soon...
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calpolyclimber
Aug 10, 2003, 2:02 AM
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"...You have ever clipped a 3 ounce set of keys to your belt with a 25 kn. carabiner"
This one probably means you aren't a climber... But you did make a little trip to REI. haha
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jitterjepp
Aug 10, 2003, 4:29 AM
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You might be an ice climber if....
sitting on a tropical beach with your toes in the sand sounds boring.
you use your ice axes to remove ice dams on your roof.
there are only two seasons in your world. Ice climbing and Ice climbings coming!
you think "DAMN THIS HEAT AND GREEN STUFF TO HELL!!"
your air conditioner is a cooling unit for a walk in freezer from Cub.
you've got the dream of buying that little hobbie farm not to raise chickens, pigs and grow your own veggies but so you can run a garden hose up that silo in the winter and have your own ice climbing palace in the winter.
you take you crampons when you go ice fishing.
you over hear your coworkers talking about how they cant wait for the snow to melt and you think "idiots"
you say you broke one of your picks and you don't own a guitar.
your ice boots are the most expensive piece of clothing.
you can walk around in a t-shirt when it's forty degrees.
you are a guy wearing bright yellow boots and no one walking by would call you a sissy.
and the number one reason you might be an ice climber....
you live in Minnesota and go to Canada for vacation. IN THE WINTER!
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oudinardin
Aug 10, 2003, 6:40 AM
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your 30 yrs old, feel 20, single (partly because of "the problem"), yet you can still put everything you own in the wagon in less than 2 hrs and move recieving your deposit in the mail. And according to my doctor my arms have stretched a bit which is typical with climbers having climbed over 10 yrs. It wont go away but it runs my life. I let it have the last say at least. Next move, overseas? Oh yeah,and I get free gear now. Friggin Yippe! Peace, Michael. Oud out, dude. Now if I could just find her. Ah, I can still dream.
"I feel the pain of everyone, then I feel nothing." Dino Jr.
Leave it up to me and my scrawny ass will be contorted this way and that after sleeping in my Suburu. I'll be 70 in my 40 year old car checking out panty lines on geriatrics during their marathon to the craft show..
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bonesz
Aug 10, 2003, 12:17 PM
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You bragg about taking a whipper............
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renobdarb
Aug 10, 2003, 3:51 PM
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,,,you've been arrested for climbing the county courthouse.
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tradmanclimbs
Aug 10, 2003, 5:18 PM
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You just might be a climber if the reasons you posted on this forum are all true. I know mine were 8)
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veggieclimber
Aug 10, 2003, 6:41 PM
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You can't understand why people keep asking you why your legs are always so scraped up.
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oldhippywithdog
Aug 10, 2003, 7:04 PM
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you might be a climber if you hear the word "flapper" from across the room and quiver.
...if you are a cashier and still have hands rougher than a carpenter.
...if when typing you think about how your actually training your tendons.
...if you moan and complain about people getting gear placement wrong in the movies and not when a single bullet blows up a car.
...if on vacation in France you admire more curves on boulders than you do on women.
...if every time you drive under a bridge on the highway you almost pull over to try and arch it.
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emtclimber
Aug 10, 2003, 7:35 PM
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In reply to: Sorry but here is another link, some of them have already been done but they have plent of lines only climber would laugh at. http://www.gdargaud.net/...Climber.html#MightBe You might be a climber if: --Reading these makes you feel "normal". --When you hear the word "Climax" refering to a point in a story you perk up thinking somone said "Climbmax" the local gym. *guilty of both. :roll:
Careful using this link.........my computer went f---ing crazy as soon as I clicked it.....might have been a typo??
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hishopper
Aug 10, 2003, 8:30 PM
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if .... you read this whole thread to this point.
if .... rc.com is your homepage. (Well, it did say might be).
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sustainedclimber
Aug 11, 2003, 5:36 AM
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You know you're a climbing family when....
Your dad sets up an anchor from your bed and uses a prusik out the window to paint the house.
Your parents get excited when you suggest building a climbing wall in the living room on the white walls.
Your parents both quit their jobs to work at ropes courses part time and climb on their days off.
The whole family crowds around the mirror comparing newly formed muscles.
crux, arete, stemming, and pumped are all commonly used words in dinnertime conversations.
I just want to say that these are all true, and that my parents are awesome. Oh, and this is definitely my favorite thread on the entire site.
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boris
Aug 11, 2003, 8:13 AM
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...you fix your car with tendon tape
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hellclimber
Aug 11, 2003, 10:13 AM
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Registered: Jul 23, 2003
Posts: 205
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... you have buildered campus buildings.
... you dream of climbing campus buildings, summiting on the roof.
... you boulder on the coat rack in the office when you're alone.
... you boulder on the same coat rack when co-students are present.
... your escape plan in case of a fire is rappelling out the window.
hellclimber
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watersprite
Aug 11, 2003, 1:55 PM
Post #63 of 303
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Registered: Jan 21, 2003
Posts: 1601
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[quote="
...using harnesses, and rope with your significant other has nothing to do with BD[SM]...
or it does!!!1
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arrettinator
Aug 11, 2003, 3:04 PM
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Registered: Oct 30, 2002
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When referring to your friends you use their RC.com and B.com usernames.
A highball isn't a cocktail glass.
Your forearms are bigger than your biceps.
When going to the Gym doesn't involve weights or treadmills.
You can make it from your car to your attic w/out touching the floor once.
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cupofjoe
Aug 11, 2003, 3:13 PM
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Registered: Aug 8, 2003
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....you turn a room in your house into a bouldering cave. 8)
.....climb your classroom walls at college. :D
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organic
Aug 11, 2003, 3:26 PM
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Registered: Jul 16, 2003
Posts: 2215
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...the clothes you are currently wearing have chalk on THEM! <-- ME!@*&^
...you do things that require a "crash pad"
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hishopper
Aug 11, 2003, 3:42 PM
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Registered: Jan 10, 2002
Posts: 387
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If... you're missing the passenger seatbelt in your approach vehicle... and have a 2" webbing swami that matches the interior.
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dano
Aug 11, 2003, 5:14 PM
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Registered: Feb 7, 2003
Posts: 86
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Your neighbors lock themselves out of their loft this weekend and instead of calling a locksmith you rap off the roof, through the open window and right on top of their roche-bobois couch in your tevas...
of course - they might be climbers if they think it's a great idea!
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metoliusmunchkin
Aug 11, 2003, 5:46 PM
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Registered: Apr 7, 2001
Posts: 1410
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...you climb.
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hoppinbig
Aug 11, 2003, 6:30 PM
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Registered: May 21, 2002
Posts: 409
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You have found a placement for all of your cams in your house
1.75 DMM - Mail slot
#1 camelot - bookshelf
#2 camelot between the fridge and the cabinet
#3 camelot - night table and the wall
etc etc
Oh - and you encourage your friends to do the same thing.... and they do
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sharpender
Aug 11, 2003, 6:32 PM
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Registered: Apr 15, 2003
Posts: 663
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You know your a climberbabe when you get excited cause a guy has micro-nuts. Your a hopeless climberbabe if you go with him right now cause he knows how to use them. :lol:
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jipstyle
Aug 11, 2003, 8:10 PM
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In reply to: When referring to your friends you use their RC.com and B.com usernames. When going to the Gym doesn't involve weights or treadmills.
With all due respect ... those have nothing to do with being a climber
;)
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alpinerock
Aug 11, 2003, 8:28 PM
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Registered: May 17, 2003
Posts: 600
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When your parents drops you off at the mall to shop for school you head over to REI and almost spend your whole budget on a new rope,
OR
when your parents drop you off at REI to shop for school!
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halcyon
Aug 11, 2003, 9:37 PM
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Registered: Jun 26, 2003
Posts: 227
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You keep a stash of money in a jar labeled harnass money (not necisarily for a harnass).
You know you're a hopeless climber when you spend your whole harnass money jar on taco bell.. 3 TIMES (about $30 in there each time).
Your parents red Dodge Durango's (think of the towing capacity) tow hitch has only been used as a rappell anchor.
You havent been climbing in weeks so you use the durango and rappell off your deck (true story).
You dad is explaining what he is going to do with the sprinler system by saying "then we'll run a pipe here and blah blah...." and you cut in and say "Then we can run a peice of webbing from this tree to this deck pole and have a slackline".
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bumrush
Aug 11, 2003, 10:14 PM
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Registered: Apr 18, 2003
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You pull a couple good moves at the gym and the owner trusts you to watch the place for a few hours 8)
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tradmanclimbs
Aug 11, 2003, 11:11 PM
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Registered: Apr 24, 2003
Posts: 2599
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You just might be a REAL CLIMBER if............
Pulling plastic fills you with the urge to deficate!!
You pull on gear rather than wast time trying to free a single move 1,000 ft off the deck and feel good about it 8)
Your girlfriend gets all hot when you break out the piton hammer :P
You have ever done the wild thang on a cliff :P
your willing to risk your life for a first accent :shock:
you have ever done the colorado fire dance :twisted: (don't try this if you have a high profile job)
You know how to dumpster dive :roll:
If you have ever considered tying off to a bird beak, pulling up the lead rope and sending a loop down to pull up more gear :shock: (I had second thoughts and climbed through without the extra gear 8)
You have ever termantated a relationship or a job to go climbing 8)
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petro
Aug 11, 2003, 11:48 PM
Post #77 of 303
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Registered: Dec 17, 2002
Posts: 176
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You've seriously considered coating your finger tips with superglue or liquid skin to climb longer...
You describe the time you fell, buildering on your friend's balcony, as that horrible climbing accident...
You broke your thumb in a "horrible climbing accident"... :oops:
Even though you were drunk, you still think that not having chalk was the reason for the "horrible climbing accident"... :twisted:
You found some perfect "cast jams" two weeks after you broke your thumb...
Your friends accuse you of aiding the off hands section when you jam your cast into it...
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pinkamy
Aug 12, 2003, 12:40 AM
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Registered: Jun 10, 2003
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...you no longer need to use a washcloth in the shower... your hands are rough enough. 8)
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hishopper
Aug 12, 2003, 2:12 AM
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Registered: Jan 10, 2002
Posts: 387
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You've come dangerously close to driving off the road while passing crags on a highway.
You know what JT means. And you live on the East Coast.
Every financial decision or investment you make has an associated rack enhancement option.
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tradmanclimbs
Aug 12, 2003, 2:23 AM
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Registered: Apr 24, 2003
Posts: 2599
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You might be a real climber if your rack is so freaking huge that when your significant other askes what you want for your Bday you can't think of anything new and settle for trying to rember which cam is in the worst shape and needs replaceing or which rope system is due for retirement 8)
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crackaddict
Aug 12, 2003, 2:55 AM
Post #81 of 303
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Registered: Jun 24, 2000
Posts: 1279
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You use a piton as a bottle opener, can opener, spoon, fork, and knife.
People look at you funny :shock: when you talk about how you spent the week hauling and ridding a pig!
:oops:
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yadeb
Aug 12, 2003, 11:01 AM
Post #82 of 303
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Registered: Apr 1, 2003
Posts: 40
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... your significant other takes out a second and larger life insurance policy with out your knowledge :shock:.
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teddy
Aug 12, 2003, 12:45 PM
Post #83 of 303
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Registered: Jul 2, 2003
Posts: 137
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... your regular pack for school includes shoes, chalk, tape and a toothbrush. I spose thats more of a bouldering thing though :P
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vertical_reality
Aug 12, 2003, 2:01 PM
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Registered: Jun 19, 2002
Posts: 2073
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You might be a climber if....
The closest thing you've ever had to a real estate agent was the guy who sold you his VW van.
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climbingfoo
Aug 12, 2003, 11:02 PM
Post #85 of 303
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Registered: Sep 25, 2002
Posts: 135
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Your hands and/or feet begain to sweat at the mention of:
rock, line(s), routes, send, etc.
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organic
Aug 13, 2003, 2:17 AM
Post #86 of 303
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Registered: Jul 16, 2003
Posts: 2215
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...you don't put on clean clothes you put on clothes with less chalk on them.
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imaclima
Aug 13, 2003, 2:31 AM
Post #87 of 303
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Registered: Jul 4, 2003
Posts: 75
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when someone mentiones stealth technology, you wonder how they made a rubber airplane fly
if you think about climbing during sex...........and so does your partner!!
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alpinerock
Aug 13, 2003, 2:39 AM
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Registered: May 17, 2003
Posts: 600
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You talk about jamming nuts in a and you are surprised when people givve you strange looks.
If during lacrosse camp you come up with 13 routes in the dorm that your staying in (V hall DT BYU for all you utahns)
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unabonger
Aug 13, 2003, 9:37 PM
Post #89 of 303
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Registered: Aug 8, 2003
Posts: 2689
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...You consider the term pinkpoint appropriate for polite dinner conversation
The unirrepresible Unabonger
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alpinerock
Aug 13, 2003, 10:28 PM
Post #90 of 303
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Registered: May 17, 2003
Posts: 600
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When you tie your shoes in a figure eight, or a double fishermens
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legless
Aug 14, 2003, 7:25 AM
Post #91 of 303
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Registered: Oct 16, 2002
Posts: 160
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you equate "being strong" with being skinny and without muscle.
you are in thailand for a month and dont go in the water once.
your forearms are bigger than your calves (possibly quads)
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roseraie
Aug 14, 2003, 10:29 AM
Post #92 of 303
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Registered: Jan 22, 2003
Posts: 439
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When bored during lecture, you amuse yourself by practicing your one-handed clove hitch with your sweatshirt strings and a novelty biner.
You doodle route names, instead of guys' names, in your notebook margins.
Every visor and hat you own has chalk thumb prints on the bill.
You dreamed about slab last night...
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allan_thomson
Aug 14, 2003, 6:13 PM
Post #93 of 303
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Registered: Jul 12, 2003
Posts: 596
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You look out for any potential routes where ever you go.
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tradmanclimbs
Aug 15, 2003, 1:22 AM
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Registered: Apr 24, 2003
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You might be a real climber if you know that bouldering is somthing you do arround the campsite after climbing all day 8)
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sharpender
Aug 15, 2003, 7:52 AM
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Registered: Apr 15, 2003
Posts: 663
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If you laugh when the whole theatre audience gasps in fear/awe of the cliff edge danger faced by the "climbers" on the screen, ala Cliffhanger.
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geezergecko
Aug 17, 2003, 1:00 AM
Post #96 of 303
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Registered: Mar 26, 2002
Posts: 729
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...you decorate your Christmas tree with bootied gear.
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rjtrials
Aug 17, 2003, 2:14 AM
Post #97 of 303
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Registered: Sep 7, 2002
Posts: 342
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-your forearms and biceps are bigger around than your girlfriends neck.
-you actually have used super glue on your fingertips to climb longer
-your so psyched the night before a climbing trip that you spend hours bouldering on the staircase with your partner
-you pick things up with you middle nuckles because your tips are totally shot
RJ
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pinkamy
Aug 17, 2003, 2:38 AM
Post #98 of 303
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Registered: Jun 10, 2003
Posts: 78
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You've figured out more than one way to get up to your church balcony without using the stairs. :)
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majoringinclimbing
Aug 17, 2003, 5:23 AM
Post #99 of 303
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Registered: Apr 28, 2003
Posts: 169
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People say you need a girlfriend and you say, "what for I have climbing!"
No matter where you are you can come of with a bouldering problem in under 30 seconds...and you won't stop til you send it!!
You can afford a $150 pair of shoes that are 2 sizes to small but you cannot afford your next meal!
You no longer see building but just buildering problems!!
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turockgirl
Aug 19, 2003, 2:56 PM
Post #100 of 303
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Registered: Jul 26, 2003
Posts: 190
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The guy at the auto parts store and an old friend in line bust out laughing when you tell them the touch-up paint is not for your car...but to mark your biners.
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keinangst
Aug 19, 2003, 3:17 PM
Post #101 of 303
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Registered: Apr 1, 2003
Posts: 1408
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(all true)
You try to tell family members what you want for Xmas from gearexpress.com--confused, they just send you a check and tell you to order it yourself.
You post-crag trip to a restaurant or shopping mall results in odd stares and questions about your chalk and tape-encrusted hands.
"Mountaineering: Freedom of the Hills" permanently sits on your toilet tank to ensure regular reading.
You have ever "rescued" a vacuum cleaner or toolbox from certain doom by escaping the belay and "going for help" :wink:
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unabonger
Aug 19, 2003, 9:56 PM
Post #102 of 303
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Registered: Aug 8, 2003
Posts: 2689
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...You steal other guys girlfriends because they give better belays than your own.
...You like the way chalk dust makes your hair have more body
...You don't think "immigrant of hispanic heritage" when someone uses the term "beaner"
...You can't afford a truck inspection sticker but you have 6 state park season pass stickers
...sticky rubber doesn't refer to a used jimmy hat
The disgusting, statue violating, rascist, vain, adulterous UnaBonger
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bertman
Aug 20, 2003, 3:21 AM
Post #103 of 303
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Registered: Jul 17, 2003
Posts: 184
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When your copy of Mountaineering: Freedom of the Hills has been no farther than 1 mile from you at all times
When your copy of Mountaineering: Freedom of the Hills has been to every place you have been since you bought it
When your copy of Mountaineering: Freedom of the Hills has been professionally re-binded 3 times after falling completely apart each time, and it needs to be fixed again
When you can recite entire sections of Mountaineering: Freedom of the Hills
When every tree in your yard has been ascended, named, and rated
When you owe $800 for last hockey season's ice time fees, yet when you earn money you spend it on the climbing wall in your backyard
When you free-climb some recently discovered cliffs in a local park because climbing is not allowed (its easier to escape when you dont have ropes, etc)
When your mom begins to wonder why her house's white walls have become increasingly more polka-dotted with black marks
When everyone at the local hardware/REI/sandblasting place knows you by name due to your frequency of visits for climbing wall supplies, or, in Newman Outfitter's case, to pretend to by testing harnesses so you can climb their indoor wall.
When the last time you asked a girl on a date, you asked her to the local climbing gym.
When any song you listen to, be it rock/rap/country/classical suddenly begins to remind you of mountains
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canadian_usc
Aug 20, 2003, 7:23 AM
Post #104 of 303
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Registered: Jun 27, 2003
Posts: 53
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........when someone talks about rapping you don't think of a genre of music.
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turockgirl
Aug 20, 2003, 2:24 PM
Post #105 of 303
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Registered: Jul 26, 2003
Posts: 190
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You have friends...and lots of them...and they aren't necessarily people.
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cyclops
Aug 21, 2003, 6:25 PM
Post #106 of 303
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Registered: Jul 22, 2003
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you and your fiancee have plans to get married on july 22 and climb El Cap on aug 13 and when people ask you when the big day is you both respond aug 13.
you dream about climbing and wake with chalk on your hands.
you carry micro nuts in your pocket to practice placing them everywhere.
you ever been fired from a job for buildering your office walls.
you lose friends because of your friends (works both ways)
you have pictures of climbing gear on your wall instead of women.
you carry climbing pictures in your wallet.
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desertclimber
Aug 27, 2003, 6:40 AM
Post #107 of 303
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Registered: Jul 26, 2003
Posts: 61
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...guys are shopping for nail polish to mark gear... (Hey, don't laugh, I use "Jazzy Pink" and "Midnight Blue" Chelly brand, no #72 and #56!!!)
...gals are unusually interested in hardware...
...your kitchen cabinets have climbing holds for knobs!
:)
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cliffmonkey2003
Sep 3, 2003, 9:40 PM
Post #108 of 303
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Registered: Jan 29, 2003
Posts: 191
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Your choice of campus depended on whether or not the buildings had fieldstone. (And they do 8)
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griffix
Dec 1, 2003, 4:49 AM
Post #110 of 303
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Registered: Oct 25, 2003
Posts: 61
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You log on to climbing sites instead of doing your homework.
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dabhaid
Dec 1, 2003, 10:58 PM
Post #111 of 303
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Registered: Nov 24, 2003
Posts: 324
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...you've traversed every room in your house using just the skirting-board and windowsills...
...the word anchor conjures up neither an image of a ship, nor sailors' tattoo
...catch yourself checking your belt twice, just to be sure
...climb stairs at least two at a time, and on your toes
...have a favourite t-shirt that reads "I busted a nut in my girlfriends rack!"
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sekcot
Dec 1, 2003, 11:11 PM
Post #112 of 303
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Registered: Dec 1, 2003
Posts: 63
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you can't see your floor because your clothes from your closet (new climbing room) are now there
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climb_plastic
Dec 1, 2003, 11:22 PM
Post #113 of 303
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Registered: Sep 24, 2003
Posts: 706
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You have shoe and chalk marks on your walls.
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hiker-climber
Deleted
Dec 1, 2003, 11:44 PM
Post #114 of 303
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-You ramble on about climbing ratings in Math Class so much that you find yourself in the "Geious" program
-You slide the inner circles of CDs and DVDs over your fingers at night to get used to crack climbing.
-teachers lock the fourth floor windows when you arrive in class (even on the hottest days) after your...incident... :roll:
-You have tested the wires on your computer for use as super-thin dynamic rope (This explains why you dont respond to my posts and for the padded white "wallpaper" in your room)
-your steam radiator no longer works after being used as an anchor for "that repel" :roll:
-you have actually replied to my post YOUTH JOBS & ROCK BARNS
-There is a man out there waiting to ask you about the death of Billy, "Last reported on your property in a harness sliding down a rope in
your tree!" :twisted:
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mrme
Dec 1, 2003, 11:53 PM
Post #115 of 303
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Registered: Oct 5, 2003
Posts: 449
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friend "hey what did you do this weekend"
respond "oh i did ecstasy"
friend "did you have fun"
respond "a blast it was a buetifull day i tell you"
friend "yea i hope it is that buetifull out next weekend because i am doing ecstasy then"
third party overhering finally ask"you mean the drug?"
respond while laughing "no a climb"
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iltripp
Dec 2, 2003, 1:09 AM
Post #116 of 303
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Registered: Oct 6, 2003
Posts: 1607
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When you get a cut on your hand, and you're first thought is to grab some chalk to stop the bleeding... Or, if you have ever used chalk to stop bleeding.
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fireyxplosion
Dec 2, 2003, 1:27 AM
Post #117 of 303
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Registered: Aug 23, 2002
Posts: 31
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hhahahah
u guys pretty much covered all the climber jokes i know.
i jut knew i was climber when i started payin my daily gym fee with a 5, six 1 s, three quarters, two dimes and a nickle.
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fireyxplosion
Dec 2, 2003, 1:39 AM
Post #118 of 303
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Registered: Aug 23, 2002
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hhahahah
u guys pretty much covered all the climber jokes i know.
i jut knew i was climber when i started payin my daily gym fee with a 5, six 1 s, three quarters, two dimes and a nickle.
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oklimber
Dec 2, 2003, 2:20 AM
Post #119 of 303
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Registered: Nov 28, 2003
Posts: 35
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you don't eat lunch at school because you want to save the money to go climb at the gym
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mattdog
Dec 2, 2003, 4:23 AM
Post #120 of 303
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Registered: Oct 1, 2003
Posts: 1523
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You know your girlfriend/wife is a climber if:
Police give you long stares due to all the bruises she accumulated on your last trip to the crags. (Actually happened!)
You start an argument with her and leave her hanging on top-rope until the argument finishes because you don't want her less than 50 feet from you in her current state.
You've been giving permission to purchase a new rope so long as it matches her new climbing tops.
You post pics of your significant other to smooth over searching through RC.com's pictures of female climbers for "inspiration." 8)
Your favorite sexual positions are the ones with her back to you so that you can check out her slammin back muscles! :twisted:
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calamity_chk
Dec 2, 2003, 5:06 AM
Post #121 of 303
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Registered: Apr 23, 2002
Posts: 7994
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yay, my favorite thread.
- you want gear and climbing trips instead of make-up sex.
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swollenmember
Dec 2, 2003, 5:20 AM
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Registered: Oct 19, 2003
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You read this post till 11 pm on a monday when you should be writing your term paper due at 7am on tuesday.
You feel safe when you hear the term bomber
You dont know why people talk about cars and dyno in the same conversation
A jug-fest has nothing to do with a Hugh hefner party
You doodle pics of quickdraws
You can think of this crap. :wink:
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thebluemongoose
Dec 2, 2003, 6:27 PM
Post #123 of 303
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Registered: Nov 29, 2003
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You lie in bed going over boulder problems instead of sleeping.
You yell "TAKE!!" when your arms get tired from typing.
You are thrown going away parties every friday at work from your boss, for fear of you may not return from the weekends climb.
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taualum23
Dec 2, 2003, 6:40 PM
Post #124 of 303
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Registered: Dec 13, 2002
Posts: 2370
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I moved a co-workers desk the other day, but before I did, I looked at my belt. Realized how silly this was, then found myself reaching around for my chalbag. Must have looked odd in suit. So be it.
Great thread!
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capn_morgan
Dec 2, 2003, 7:32 PM
Post #125 of 303
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Registered: Oct 7, 2003
Posts: 565
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...if you know that money can buy friends.
...if when someone mentions "aliens" you dont think of space ships or the movies.
...if you bought an alarm clock to keep in your glove box so you dont oversleep on the weekends.
...if noone is surprised that you went climbing over thanksgiving instead of spending it with your family...who were 300 miles closer.
...if you average 2000 miles a month on your car....and you have a 10 mile commute.
...if you think nothing of driveing 400 miles each way on the off chance there will be enough ice to climb...think 2 day weekend.
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jpearl
Dec 2, 2003, 8:10 PM
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Ha Ha...Great Thread!
Here's a few more:
- you grab every doornob, draw handle, and subway rail with a nice two-finger pinch.
- you show up to work the next day with chalk-encrusted fingernails (and yes, you did take a shower).
- people compliment you not on your abs or biceps, but on your forearms.
- your "slippers" are not fuzzy and shaped like bunnies!
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g.g.32-82
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Dec 5, 2003, 3:57 AM
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-you catch yourself trying to double back your belt in the morning(done it)
-stare at your hands and admire all the new callous tissue.
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harrisha
Dec 5, 2003, 5:25 AM
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you read this whole post
the only two stores you need in life are REI and your local grocer and only because you can't afford the food at REI because you spent the majority of your money on more gear.
you thank about the amount of money in your bank account not in terms of dollars and cents but rather how much gear you can buy.
you get bored in physics and bolder the acid proof tables. the way the table are set up you can crimp the overhanging lip and use the drawer pulls as foot holds then go to the next table four feet away by jaming your foot b/t the draw and and cabinet side the thing sits on and then trying to pull a dyno to the the next lip crimp.
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lemmon_squeezer
Dec 5, 2003, 8:11 AM
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...when you look at universities not by the quality of their programs but by the proximity to good climbing
Best thread yet!!
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dc
Dec 5, 2003, 2:40 PM
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In reply to: if .... you read this whole thread to this point. if .... rc.com is your homepage. (Well, it did say might be).
yeah.. both are true for me.. yes even the first one.. (all 9 pages) :oops:
all the good replies have been taken by now.. and as everyone has said this is a damn awesome thread!
In reply to: You know what JT means. And you live on the East Coast.
also:
if/when you check out a girl you first look at her forearms :wink:
and:
every building has a route
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boulderqt
Dec 5, 2003, 4:08 PM
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If you read every single post on all nine pages.
If you climb more days then you work.
You work at a summer camp where you don't get off till 9:30, 10 at night but you still go climbing even though it is pitch black! ( i did this all last summer)
"You log on to climbing sites instead of doing your homework."so true
"Not only is your Nalgene scratched and covered in climbing stickers, but the stickers are so sun-bleached that you can't tell what they say" ( i dropped mine off a cliff)
If you drive 2.5 hours to go climbing even though the rocks have snow on them and it's below freezing
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malabarista
Dec 5, 2003, 4:27 PM
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You might be a climber if when you get ready to make an important point during a presentation at work, you instinctively reach for your (absent) chalk bag.
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iclimbtoo
Dec 5, 2003, 4:31 PM
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...your girlfriend tells you your hands are dry and it makes you smile.
...she tries to tell you to put some lotion on them and you give her a look probably similar to if a person from the stone age were to see a car.
...you don't mind sticking your nutz into random and unfamiliar cracks.
...when your Ethics professor asks for someone in class to name off a list of heros they have, and after saying, "Anatoli Boukreev, Reinhold Messner, Alex Lowe, Steph Davis, Lynn Hill, Peter Croft, Irvine and Mallory, etc." the entire class just stares at you in completely uncomfortable silence not having a clue what or who you're reffering to. (yep...that would have been yesterday... :lol: )
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gregtrammell
Dec 5, 2003, 4:33 PM
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You might be a climber if......
... you practice your crimp hold on the lip of the sunroof in your car (or on the steering wheel at red lights).
... you keep a countdown timer til it's time to leave for the next climbing trip.
and yes i did read all nine pages (while working), just to make sure mine were original.
great post, i've done many of these things.
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nagatana
Dec 6, 2003, 12:47 AM
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..your fingertips hurt while replying to this thread.*
*just slightly, of course!
..in acting class, when the teacher leaves the theatre early, you and another climber find an alternate way onto the catwalks. And when a girl tries to get up, you automaticaly put your hands up to spot her while everyone just stares. And while the the other guys are checking her out while she's struggling, you're looking at how her hands and feet are doing to see if she's gonna fall.
And you find that girl 100x more attractive 'cause she just climbed something. :D
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canrocker
Dec 6, 2003, 1:06 AM
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... if you roll out of bed, head to the bathroom, look in the mirror, and are not at all surprised to see the reddish imprint of a carabiner across your face (this has happened to me- several times!) :?
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cjstudent
Dec 6, 2003, 11:30 AM
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You are up 5:00 this morning because you woke up, remembered you would be climbing in a few hours and couldn't go back to sleep so you get on rc.com and read through 9 pages about being a real climber until your lazy climbing partner gets up and calls you. U do this while its 30 deg outside, and snowing...and yet you are still going climbing...yea!
or...if you log more hours on rc.com than you do in your college classes.
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alan_ellis
Dec 6, 2003, 2:58 PM
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.....you have no idea who the cast of "Friends" are.
.....you would rather sleep in your 4WD Toyota than in your bed.
.....all your meals at home are planned around 2 cups of boiling water.
.....you buy a scale to weigh gear instead of you.
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superfox
Dec 6, 2003, 4:50 PM
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. . .you watch a TV show/music video you hate because you see a nice line going up the rocks in the background.
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ksudyno
Dec 6, 2003, 5:52 PM
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When you have 2 magazines in the mail, one is a playboy and the other is the new winter mgear catalog and you check out the mgear catalog first.
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phyre
Dec 6, 2003, 5:53 PM
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...When bored in class you draw detailed pictures of climbing routes from memory.
...You can't do internet research for a paper because you have RC.com set as your homepage and you have to read 10 pages of posts first.
Great thread!!!!!
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jebel_andi
Dec 6, 2003, 6:47 PM
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..... you annoy your friends by pointing out technical inaccuracies in movies like "vertical limit" and "cliff hanger"
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ksudyno
Dec 6, 2003, 6:54 PM
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You might be a climber if..
When you play climbing videos as background noise when you read climbing magazines.
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shutupandclimb
Dec 6, 2003, 7:40 PM
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... you throw your water bottle off cliffs and don't worry about it breaking
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c_kryll
Dec 6, 2003, 9:14 PM
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Your working part-time building houses to help fund your next climbing trip when your boss approaches you and asks if it's true your a climber. After replying yes, he tells you to go up on the 3rd story roof and finish it because none of his other workers will in this weather. (cold and snowing)
Chris
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rendog
Dec 6, 2003, 10:21 PM
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In reply to: You might be an ice climber if.... sitting on a tropical beach with your toes in the sand sounds boring. you use your ice axes to remove ice dams on your roof. there are only two seasons in your world. Ice climbing and Ice climbings coming! you think "DAMN THIS HEAT AND GREEN STUFF TO HELL!!" your air conditioner is a cooling unit for a walk in freezer from Cub. you've got the dream of buying that little hobbie farm not to raise chickens, pigs and grow your own veggies but so you can run a garden hose up that silo in the winter and have your own ice climbing palace in the winter. you take you crampons when you go ice fishing. you over hear your coworkers talking about how they cant wait for the snow to melt and you think "idiots" you say you broke one of your picks and you don't own a guitar. your ice boots are the most expensive piece of clothing. you can walk around in a t-shirt when it's forty degrees. you are a guy wearing bright yellow boots and no one walking by would call you a sissy. and the number one reason you might be an ice climber.... you live in Minnesota and go to Canada for vacation. IN THE WINTER!
lmmfao you pretty much nailed it man.
You forgot one though.....
you only rock climb to stay in shape in the off season for ice climbing.
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crimpman
Dec 6, 2003, 10:52 PM
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You sleep on your crashpad on the floor instead of on your big bed.
Nobody at school asks you what you're going to do over the weekend because they already know... You're going climbing!
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robmcc
Dec 6, 2003, 11:04 PM
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...you're sitting here desperately hoping one you'll get to drive all night to climb in sub 20 degree temps all day tomorrow, then drive all night to get home in time for work.
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climbingspaz
Dec 6, 2003, 11:43 PM
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-- you've been given the option of the significant other or the climbing weekend, and chosen climbing.
-- you look forward to spending time in the cold, rain, or hail for a day of climbing.
-- you've eaten only peanut butter sandwiches for periods of 4 days or longer.
-- protein bars are one of your favorite foods.
-- there isn't anything that can't be fixed by chalk or a biner.
-- you use your shower to air out your tent.
-- the gear in your truck is worth more than the truck itself. by a long shot.
-- bandannas, knit caps, and sleeveless tshirts are 3 of your favorite "fashion" items.
-- you get prana confused with prada. often.
-- you've spent time in a bar in a harness on a non-S+M night.
-- red rocks doesn't mean music (at least primarily) to you
great thread.
CF
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hiker-climber
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Dec 6, 2003, 11:57 PM
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In reply to: ...When bored in class you draw detailed pictures of climbing routes from memory.
yup. I drafted a problem on a V2 at the Gym while "paying attention" in Algebra. Hey, so what if I can only do a V2! I wish I was 5'2"!! :D
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girlclimb
Dec 7, 2003, 2:35 AM
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... if when other's borrow your zoology notes they think they mistaked them for a rock climbing comic strip.
.... if your dorm room wall is covered with pictures of rock climbers and cliffs
...if you've tried to climb more then half the buildings on campus
... if you have made a climbing route in the hallway of your dorm
... if your back round is different cliffs so you can day dream about climbing it instead of doing your homework
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rockclimbr
Dec 7, 2003, 5:12 AM
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girlclimb
about the backrounds being different cliffs...guilty, to the extreem...one day, i might be the climber in those pics..one can only dream :lol:
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kingman
Dec 7, 2003, 5:56 AM
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In reply to: You drop something at work and yell... Rock
Better yet; you drop somthing at work and you and your coworker yell rock... Been there done that, it was a funny day.
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kingman
Dec 7, 2003, 6:00 AM
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In reply to: You have thought to inquire as to whether or not REI has a wedding registry.
once again. Been there done that, didn't know they had one though. Wedding still a couple months off...
Or: you try to figure how you can have the wedding at the top of the local crag.
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zachallen
Dec 14, 2003, 12:57 AM
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You describe your dog's head as sloped and open-handed.
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dabhaid
Dec 14, 2003, 2:39 AM
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"flag" doesn't make you think of the stars and stripes (or tricolour or whatever)
you think this thread is the greatest thing on the net - cheers guys and gals, you're all legends!
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ninjaslut
Dec 14, 2003, 2:50 AM
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....you're still adding lines to this freaking ancient thread!
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diodesanddihedrals
Dec 14, 2003, 3:32 AM
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...you spend your not-climbing time reading threads like this
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dietzpa
Dec 14, 2003, 4:22 AM
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You have two culumative exams tomorrow after 4 semesters of ball busting work and everytime you try and fall alseep you're fingers hurt just by thinking about the bouldering problem you couldnt solve 4 days ago...goodbye GPA
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realization
Dec 14, 2003, 7:15 AM
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*You have to explain who the companies are of the t-shirts you wear to school everyday to your schoolmates.
*you have posters of Chris Sharma doing "the never ending story" in your room
*You have photo albums of your last climbing trip, but not your last family get-together or your girl-friend.
*This year's Christmas list is entirely comprised of new climbing gear
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thomascrown
Dec 14, 2003, 7:33 AM
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your christmas presents all go from having "for ages 6 and up" to orange and while tags that say "climbing is inherently a dangerous sport..."
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snars
Dec 16, 2003, 3:22 PM
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In reply to: You just might be a climber if....... you use old climbing rope and a vw buss for logging :roll: you sleep in the buss more nights than in the house 8)
Rofl, I have once used climbing gear to try and pull my VW bus out of the mud. Took a lot of time that could have been spent climbing/drinking/relaxing..and it didn't work anyway, so I bought a mean-ass syncro (= 4x4) VW bus to avoid getting stuck. Ever 8)
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jacob
Dec 17, 2003, 1:34 AM
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Your idea of camping is sleeping on your crashpad in the back of your Honda Oddessy after a good boulder session.
You live in Texas and talk about how many "Biners" you have and people think your a racist.
Your house has white chalk marks on the outside where your friends have identified builder problems.
Your neighbors question your motives for your new landscaping project when you cut down all your flowers and bushes to surround your house with pea gravel to dampen landings.
Your gym sees your car pull up and they lock the doors.
Youv'e served after school detention for climbing up building "A".
You intentionally throw your frisbee on top of tall structures.
Instead of doing your science lab, you try to send your latest "problem" under the lab tables.
You read 11 friggin pages on how to know if your a rock climber when your semester finals are tommorow.
Your sixteen and you have NO idea how to find your way through Austin Texas, but you know exactly how to get to Reimers, Mckiney, Arg, Greenbelt, Bull creek, E-rock, and your nearest R.E.I.
Your (non-climbing) girlfriend won't hold hands with you because you cut off her circulation.
You calmly remind yourself to be tolerant of outsiders when they ask you how you "got the rope up there."
People think your a druggie cuz you have white powder all over your clothes.
Your church pastor yells at you to get off the church roof.
Awesome thread.
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chosschick
Dec 29, 2003, 6:21 AM
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you reach for your chalk when your skiing a steep line
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hoofers_andy
Dec 29, 2003, 8:48 AM
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...when you're too drunk to make it up to your loft you just pass out on the crashpad under your dorm room bouldering wall. (not that i have dont that or anything (my RA frequents this site...))
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mreardon
Dec 29, 2003, 9:40 PM
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True Stories (to show how sad my life really is):
You're making a climbing video in Joshua Tree and stop filming two naked women to check out the moves on a boulder problem.
You arrive at Stoney Point for a crank session, head to the North side away from the locals for some private time, and get pissed because Playboy is doing a shoot of the Swedish Bikini Team on your problems.
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airscape
Dec 30, 2003, 9:21 PM
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...when petzl isn't something you eat with beer.
...when you start calling your gear "MY PRECIOUS" and you would live on raw fish in a cave as long as no one took it from us! don't we my precious?
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the_pirate
Dec 30, 2003, 9:41 PM
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.... if you've ever spooned with another man in a non-sexual manner...
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scottcody
Dec 30, 2003, 9:54 PM
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.... you piss an entire day of work away while reading a 12 page thread on "you might be a climber if"
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juanjo
Dec 30, 2003, 11:13 PM
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Quitting my job just because I have the mountain at my window :D
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climbersoze
Dec 31, 2003, 9:19 PM
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In reply to: You have ACTUALLY inquired if REI has a wedding registry (They Do!) Alon :)
Guilty!!!! Of course the wedding didnt go through... so no gifts for me :cry:
(So I got a job at REI anyway to beef up my rack using pro-deals and emp. discounts :) )
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climbersoze
Dec 31, 2003, 9:24 PM
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... You recognize Jon Krakauer and Conrad Anker by only getting a quick glance of the bottom half of their faces underneath down parkas and behind glacier glasses as you are flipping through the channels - resulting in a two hour stint of gawking at PBS at 1 AM.... I did it last night :roll:
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greyicewater
Jan 2, 2004, 11:04 PM
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all i know is that i'm trying to find a job around climbing...
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frankyb
Jan 3, 2004, 2:15 AM
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if you broke the door frame on your boss' office door doing pull-ups with other people on a really slow day at the office.....
now I got to go fix it tomorrow.. that is the lowest I got... so far
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freakystyley
Jan 3, 2004, 2:19 AM
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your wife asks you for a quickie - and she means the 5.9 on the way out to the car
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g-funk
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Jan 3, 2004, 2:45 AM
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This is the greatest thread ever. The only one that I have to add is:
. . .if you've named your dogs (or other pets) after routes (Kryptonite and Free Rider)
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hosh
Jan 5, 2004, 1:47 AM
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...your knuckles are always bloody but you've never been in a fist fight.
...you wear smaller shoes than your little sister (And like it)
...you've considered a job as a window washer on a sky-scraper just so you can get paid to "practice"
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reddaisies
Jan 5, 2004, 4:04 AM
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..... you get voice messages from non-climbing friends saying "...you're probably not picking up your phone because you're busy climbing..." ... and you really are
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allilovesrocks
Jan 5, 2004, 4:53 AM
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if your shirts all have holes i the mid drift area from belaying
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cadaverchris
Jan 5, 2004, 5:23 AM
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you forget you have your pants cuffed-up (rolled up to see your toes) from climbing.
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timmah
Jan 5, 2004, 7:10 AM
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...you pass out after a conference dinner and wake up on top of the wardrobe back in your room.
...you've been deathly sick for a fortnight but still find chalk splotches in random places on almost everything you own.
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sportyclimber
Sep 24, 2005, 5:06 AM
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You figured out a way to get onto the overhanging roof of your school with a spotter instead of a latter to get a frisbee. Then, you start purposely throwing the frisbee on it every day.
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superbum
Sep 24, 2005, 6:14 AM
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you can sand your deck
with your fingertips :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P
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konamtbiker
Sep 24, 2005, 6:44 AM
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You see a naked woman standing in front of El Capa and say thats gonna be a new problem
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slablizard
Sep 24, 2005, 8:29 AM
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Airscape
I couldn't fix your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
:lol: :lol: :lol:
.when petzl isn't something you eat with beer.
...when you start calling your gear "MY PRECIOUS" and you would live on raw fish in a cave as long as no one took it from us! don't we my precious?
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jinx
Sep 24, 2005, 2:49 PM
Post #187 of 303
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In reply to: You drop something at work and yell... Rock |
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jinx
Sep 24, 2005, 2:49 PM
Post #188 of 303
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In reply to: You drop something at work and yell... Rock |
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realdeal39
Sep 24, 2005, 4:20 PM
Post #189 of 303
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You break up with your fiance and decide not to attend college in Hawaii so you can work in Yosemite for the summer...I actually did this.
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the_soph
Sep 24, 2005, 4:31 PM
Post #190 of 303
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you boulder your spiral staircase every night before bed
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hibby11
Sep 24, 2005, 6:47 PM
Post #191 of 303
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Slablizard........ that signature is ridiculous
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shire
Sep 25, 2005, 2:03 AM
Post #192 of 303
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you open doors with one finger, crimp on the pencil holder portion of ur school desk, close your eyes and run over the moves of ur newest project during prayer in church, your password is Sharma something, don't go and watch a movie with a hot girl cause u wanna go home and watch Rampage (me just 5 minuts ago, no joke)
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csgambill
Sep 25, 2005, 2:19 AM
Post #193 of 303
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In reply to: In reply to: You wear your harness to work and and yell TAKE when you get to the top of the elevator shaft. Wow, I don't think you'd be called a climber. I'm pretty sure you'd be called 'Special'.
I work in the Sears Tower, they'd probably arrest me for that. I really don't want to spend my life in G'itmo.
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samxbam8
Sep 25, 2005, 2:53 AM
Post #194 of 303
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-if you boulder the picnic tables at soccer on water breaks
-you drag your soccer friends to the wall even though u know they dont like it.
-You have tried climbing the cafeteria wall.
-Got in trouble for climbing the outside of the circle tube at recess, so came back at night to do it when there were no teachers.
-Set up a toprope in your room at 1 oclock in the morning
-Climb the fireplace at home
-Daisy chain the strings on your soccer shorts
-Tought your friends how to daisy chain their soccer shorts
-Tie yourself to the ceiling of the basement and hang their for hours
-Watch the 10 second rock climbing scene for EVEREST over and over again
-Use 4 old ropes to make a toprope in your backyard using a toy belt as a harness and having your brother hold the rope with his bare hands.
- You practice belaying in english
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lofstromc
Sep 25, 2005, 3:37 AM
Post #195 of 303
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Your nuts are different sizes, and you don't mind!
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lofstromc
Sep 25, 2005, 3:42 AM
Post #196 of 303
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You who Frank Endo is and your not a gymnast.
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lofstromc
Sep 25, 2005, 3:50 AM
Post #197 of 303
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You've already come up with names for those routes you will establish some day.
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crazyakclimber
Sep 25, 2005, 4:17 AM
Post #198 of 303
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.....If you have a name for each of your cams and talk to them while you climb.
.....If your carry on bag weighs more than 80 pounds.
......If you look @ a pile of rocks or dirt and imagine it to be a big mountain and then route find. :lol:
......If you sleep in a sleeping bag for more than three months out of the year and like it. :P
......If basically you involve climbing somehow in every aspect of life. :roll:
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oldrnotboldr
Sep 27, 2005, 3:11 PM
Post #199 of 303
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a climber family when everyone sits around the campfire comparing the bruises and scrapes from the day's climbing outing.
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outsideguyzak
Sep 27, 2005, 3:24 PM
Post #200 of 303
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I. If you climb anything and everything. From door frames, to sculptures, to buildings in your university(got in trouble by two old professors), to brick smoke stacks(almost got arrested for this one), to stone penacostal churches(almost got arrested for that one too!) to trees and much much much much more!! If it looks remotely climbable or even if it doesn't i'll try!!!
II. If adding to your rack is more important than your car payment.
III. If you skip class/work to climb and don't care.
IV. If your life goals are to become a homeless climbing bum!!!!!!
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artsylady567
Sep 28, 2005, 2:30 PM
Post #201 of 303
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if you are short and u can't reach the high shelves of your cabinets just pull a few face moves. screw the step stool.
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angry
Sep 28, 2005, 2:37 PM
Post #202 of 303
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you climb
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lofstromc
Oct 15, 2005, 3:09 AM
Post #203 of 303
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Finger-jamming and fist-jamming are painful to you and no one else
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superbum
Oct 28, 2005, 6:04 AM
Post #204 of 303
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if you just moved to Bishop, CA and took a minimum wage job and are now renting a small house that's almost exactly halfway between the buttermilks and the volcanic tablelands.
if you have enuf climbing mags to kill a german shepard if they were to be dropped on its spine from a considerable height.
if you enjoy drinking beer, but always say that you are gonna cut back because it is giving you a fat gut.
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henso12
Oct 28, 2005, 1:43 PM
Post #205 of 303
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In reply to: You break up with your fiance and decide not to attend college in Hawaii so you can work in Yosemite for the summer...I actually did this.
Butters your the man!!!!
Oh yeah you need to bring it down to Bama and visit me at HP40 you won't be disappointed
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ok_climber123
Feb 12, 2006, 5:58 AM
Post #206 of 303
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if you hang from the rafters of your garage/house/barn for hours in your harness just for fun.....
if your keyboard has chalk all over it...
if all the light switches in your house look like theve been finger printed...
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goob3r
Feb 12, 2006, 6:57 AM
Post #207 of 303
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you know what a slackline is..
you have light blue or white boogers..
a campus has nothing to do with academics..
you "belay" every day but haven't "been laid" in months..
you've acquired a taste for cliff bars and red bull..
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goob3r
Feb 12, 2006, 7:16 AM
Post #208 of 303
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the best use of google earth you can think of is for scouring your local hills for new bouldering and slacklining spots...
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porcelainsunset
Feb 12, 2006, 8:42 AM
Post #209 of 303
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... if you ever built a home bouldering wall even though you only live half an hour away from a world class climbing area, so you could climb three times a day rather than three times a week.
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bester
Feb 12, 2006, 5:27 PM
Post #210 of 303
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In reply to: .....If you have a name for each of your cams and talk to them while you climb.
you know you are in trouble when they talk back.
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puppypusher
Feb 12, 2006, 9:14 PM
Post #211 of 303
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-you use your portaledge stove...in your kitchen...and eat camp food
-your cabinets are filled with clif bars, bottled water, and "Backpackers Pantry" food
-you pack a haulbag for your sons/daughters first day at school
-youve moved your bed out bc it took up too much space and moved in your crashpad
-you bring your climbing shoes to work...just in case
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mikej
Feb 13, 2006, 5:57 PM
Post #212 of 303
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all true...
You DID register at Rei for your wedding.
you changed your credit card to rei to get more gear
your sick and tired of people trying to out grip you when you shake hands...ho hum...
you talk like you expect everyone to know what you mean when you mention the 5 or v scale.
you're more proud of your wife for being able to campus than for her graduating college.
you realize you have cuts on your arms and legs only after the adrenaline wears off.
did the ramen and frozen pizza diet for years just to afford trips to the local climbing gym and gear for weekend trips.
Gaston isn't just your annoying french neighbor.
You've been defeated when trying to convince wife to name children climbing terms.
You've lost enough sets of nail clippers to supply India.
You frequent the local crag enough that the dusted and cut hands are no mystery to your waitress.
You've considered exchanging the door handles on your beater for climbing holds.
You almost cried when you found out there wont be a PBB this year
read all 14 pages and enjoyed every minute of it, wish i could say the same about my job.
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epoch
Moderator
Feb 13, 2006, 10:43 PM
Post #213 of 303
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Your dumb ass isn't posting a message here, but rather is really out tearing it up at your local gym
fuck!!!!
I mean crag.
(If you really have to ask this question, then you definately are not.)
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nola_angie
Feb 14, 2006, 12:40 AM
Post #214 of 303
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In reply to: ...you've considered a job as a window washer on a sky-scraper just so you can get paid to "practice"
-when your sick boyfriend looks at you and your second* (first is, of course, hoping he's okay) thought is "Shit, now I gotta find someone else for belay!"
-you dream in 5.10b's
-you climb the walls at work until your boss gets sick of you and sends you home (so you can go climb!!! Hey, at least she didn't fire me!)
-your car has a 2 ft. sticker of the Mammut logo on the HOOD (hey man, you can always find it in the parking lot)
-you don't day dream of beaches and long walks, you day-dream of cliff faces and multi-pitches
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indebt
Feb 14, 2006, 1:01 AM
Post #215 of 303
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spread your legs and trust the rubber is mentioned more often at the cliff than in the bedroom
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porcelainsunset
Feb 14, 2006, 7:01 AM
Post #216 of 303
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...you associate bongs with crack, not weed.
...you know that well wasted time on this site dosent make you a climber. (I still spend about 10 hours a week here.)
...you know that REI is not a good climbing store, even though your girlfriend works there.
...your girlfriend is more interested in your rack than you are in her bust size.
...your pissed that Ice Climbing and Rock climbing are not Olympic sports, but at the same time you are kind of glad that they are not. Even though those god awful anouncers would proably explain to the masses the ever annoying question of "how did you get the rope up there."
...your faviorte boulder problem is the one into your second stroy apartment when you forget your keys, or the one your girlfriend does when she is surprising you.
...a mantle has nothing to do with a fireplace unless you are climbing one.
...you have a strong emotional connection to geological features like the valley, the creek, and the george.
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goob3r
Feb 14, 2006, 7:28 AM
Post #217 of 303
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You've built an unfavorable relationship with the goons at your local climbing gym, because you keep harrassing the course setters about new bouldering problems you came up with at 2am the night before while watching bouldering videos.
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kydd76
Feb 14, 2006, 2:21 PM
Post #218 of 303
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you say that was a fast screw and don't feel guilty about it.
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katalyzt
Feb 14, 2006, 4:46 PM
Post #219 of 303
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When this was your second time reading through all 15 pages just hoping you'de find one you missed.
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jsoper
Feb 14, 2006, 5:07 PM
Post #220 of 303
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you punch holes in the drywall of you apartment with your tools from lack of ice outside.
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lofstromc
Feb 15, 2006, 2:40 AM
Post #221 of 303
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In reply to: When this was your second time reading through all 15 pages just hoping you'de find one you missed.
funny :D
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idahoclimber
Feb 15, 2006, 3:05 AM
Post #222 of 303
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this post is great. all of it is so true!!!!
- when everything you touch is a possible hold. better yet when you throw your weight into it!!!!
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curtis_g
Feb 15, 2006, 3:26 AM
Post #223 of 303
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...you are a 17 year old boy and instead of searching for porn at 1AM, you search for pictures of Gunks classics like the Buddah at 1AM.
except I'm 18 and I'm asleep by 12:30. haha
and
...your pissed that Ice Climbing and Rock climbing are not Olympic sports, but at the same time you are kind of glad that they are not. Even though those god awful anouncers would proably explain to the masses the ever annoying question of "how did you get the rope up there."
thats so true
and
you have to lie to your girlfriend about your soloing habbit instead of your crack habbit
haha, i love that.
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welikoa
Feb 15, 2006, 4:32 AM
Post #224 of 303
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When your climbing so effing hard that you start to puke in the middle of a pitch and dont bat an eye, fall off, or quit. Personal experience. Thats when I felt like a climber haha
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porcelainsunset
Feb 15, 2006, 8:28 AM
Post #225 of 303
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... after hearing the phrase "five ten" you first think of a grade, then a shoe company, and you then need to remind yourself that those numbers together also refers to tell time when you over here the Grocery clerk say that to a little old laddy. Grandma climbs five ten, what???
...you can wear Marmont and not get attacked by that croud of angry animal rights protestors.
...when you here 'C-4' and first you think of a type of cam, then an aid grad, then a type of rubber, and lastly an explosive. Sorry if this one was a little redundant. I think that has already been touched.
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karina
Feb 15, 2006, 6:05 PM
Post #226 of 303
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...you watched king kong climb the empire state building and thought "nice layback on that arrete" and "he really stuck that slopper"
...you no longer have "fat" days, but rather "heavy" days
...are the maid of honour at your sister's wedding and are trying to devise a way to fit in a session before the wedding, since it is being held right by a nice crag
...can only date ppl that climb, are willing to learn, or enjoy reading a book by a crag every vacation or summer weekend
...all you conversations at parties start "do you climb?"
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8flood8
Feb 15, 2006, 6:11 PM
Post #227 of 303
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reach for your chalkbag because your hands are sweating while you type...
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the_climber
Feb 15, 2006, 6:37 PM
Post #228 of 303
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You have had to run away from Campus and Regular Police on a repetative basis with Crampons and Ice axes while climbing trees on University/City property... Don't you love the preseason warm-up for ice.
Also, if you have ever tried to explain to the police that ice axes are NOT weapons and that their gun can be holstered. :shock:
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drewskey
Feb 15, 2006, 7:48 PM
Post #229 of 303
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i always say the ac dials in my car would make good holds. Oh, and Ihave climbed my house.
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epoch
Moderator
Feb 15, 2006, 7:55 PM
Post #230 of 303
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In reply to: You have had to run away from Campus and Regular Police on a repetative basis with Crampons and Ice axes while climbing trees on University/City property... Don't you love the preseason warm-up for ice. Also, if you have ever tried to explain to the police that ice axes are NOT weapons and that their gun can be holstered. :shock:
You laugh.....
.................................You've done similar on a US Military installation... :wink:
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idahoclimber
Feb 15, 2006, 10:41 PM
Post #231 of 303
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you ever feel like a bunch of bohemians? i'm not sayin it's bad. i quite enjoy the life style, but more so the actual act of gropping a hard surface.
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boardline22
Mar 6, 2006, 6:37 PM
Post #232 of 303
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You rip off a sound pad in the band room from trying to mantle it and don't care that you got in trouble, but that you did not finish the problem. You also are upset that you have to pay for it, but that it will cut away from you climbing found
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t.vegas
Deleted
Mar 7, 2006, 5:18 AM
Post #233 of 303
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You refer to the owner of your local climbing shop as your pusher, and when you come in he just says Hi and moves out of your way so you can go behind the counter and drool all over the nice shiny gear.
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goob3r
Mar 7, 2006, 6:09 AM
Post #234 of 303
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When your girlfriend has good reason to be jealous: and you often question your commitment to someone who doesn't know the difference between a cam and a condom... or their similarities :lol:
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nevenneve
Mar 7, 2006, 6:40 AM
Post #235 of 303
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You've ever singly exposed all the layer of skin on your fingertips.
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rhaig
Mar 7, 2006, 4:26 PM
Post #236 of 303
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In reply to: . ...You look at every vertical surface you see as a potential climb. ...You have ever clipped a 3 ounce set of keys to your belt with a 25 kn. carabiner
this is too true....
I just started climbing a couple of months ago and I have a 24KN carabiner on my belt with my keys on them, and I can't walk down the hall at work or go outto the parking garage without looking at cracks and signs and railings as handholds and footholds.
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boardline22
Mar 7, 2006, 10:02 PM
Post #237 of 303
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When you are asked to go on a trip to Europe, you ask if you will be able to climb. You also don't know why people laugh and look at you strangly when you ask these questions.
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boardline22
Mar 8, 2006, 6:16 PM
Post #238 of 303
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you beg for money at lunch then use it to buy a season climbing gym pass
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sustainedclimber
Mar 8, 2006, 8:23 PM
Post #239 of 303
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In reply to: ...using harnesses, and rope with your significant other has nothing to do with BD.
Ok, Ok, I can't help myself. The double meaning is killing me. It really should read,
...using harnesses, and rope with your significant other has nothing to do with BD...but it does have to do with BD.
I of course mean Black Diamond
-Josh
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erin
Mar 8, 2006, 9:03 PM
Post #240 of 303
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In reply to: if you are short and u can't reach the high shelves of your cabinets just pull a few face moves. screw the step stool.
I do this in my closet to reach the top shelf
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boardline22
Apr 10, 2006, 3:13 AM
Post #241 of 303
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You have seriously thought about missing the ACT for a slight possbility to go climbing.
You pick a car/truck because of its use as a climbing mobile
ou spilt up your income in three ways, 2/4 go to an out of state college with climbing nearby, 1/4 goes to your new/first climbing mobile, and the remaining 1/4 goes to climbing gear.
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rhythm164
Apr 10, 2006, 3:46 AM
Post #242 of 303
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--you find yourself unconciously stretching your fingers and wrists at work
--people who overhear your conversations can't understand a word of them
--you shop exclusivly at Salvation Army because you absolutly HAVE to add the new C3's to your rack.
--you bring (at least) your shoes and chalk bag EVERYWHERE
--you can crush walnuts without a nutcracker
--you're on this site more than 3 times a day
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heximp
Apr 10, 2006, 10:30 AM
Post #243 of 303
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-Reading "the bible" has nothing to with religion. (Freedom Of The Hills.)
-You have climbed a building in your high heels because you wanted to know if the pointed toes were good for edging.
-You need to mark the toothbrush you used for cleaning holds so you won't brush your teeth with it later.
-A guy yells out "tits" and it makes you feel more comfortable about fallowing him...
-All the ropes you use for moving; tying your furniture/fridge to the truck "stretch..."
-You use super glue on your fingers on purpose.
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mikej
Apr 10, 2006, 5:23 PM
Post #244 of 303
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In reply to: -You have climbed a building in your high heels because you wanted to know if the pointed toes were good for edging. |
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trebork2
Deleted
Apr 10, 2006, 5:40 PM
Post #245 of 303
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You refer to the body parts of a female when she walks by with "nice oh my god holds, jugs, crimpers" or "did you give her the big bro"
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perci
Apr 11, 2006, 4:35 AM
Post #246 of 303
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...on the way to climb you get in a car accident, deeming your car undrivable, and yet, you can still find a way to go climbing for the rest of the day.
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boulder_fiend
Apr 14, 2006, 10:18 PM
Post #247 of 303
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... you use a chalknag as a purse 8^) (seen it)
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codhands
Apr 14, 2006, 10:24 PM
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You have a queen size portaledge equiped with a down featherbed.
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porcelainsunset
Apr 21, 2006, 5:23 AM
Post #249 of 303
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...kinky ropes has nothing to do with S and M
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thor4life144
Apr 22, 2006, 2:56 AM
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When you think that a green TCU is the PERFECT back scratcher (which it is...)
When you and your climbing buddies have rated (and in come cases taped) routes in and around your school
When you can say you did crack on 4/20 and people actually know what you mean
When you can say you have nuts of steel and mean it
You think that wearing yellow/lime/orange shoes is perfectally normal
You have had a teacher ask you what the powdery white stuff on your face is
Had a teacher FLIP when he saw you giving a bag of clumpy chalk to a fellow climber in school
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heximp
Apr 22, 2006, 6:37 AM
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When you need a flashlight, you grab a headlamp.
You use duct tape for everything, including blisters.
You wake up with an imprint of a wall hammer on your face.
You actually have fallen while you slept. (Portal ledge)
You have seen birds flying at eye level.
You have a deeper understanding of leg room from sleeping in your car.
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porcelainsunset
Apr 25, 2006, 8:05 PM
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In reply to: When you can say you did crack on 4/20 and people actually know what you mean Had a teacher FLIP when he saw you giving a bag of clumpy chalk to a fellow climber in school
:lol: :lol: :lol: Loved both of those
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epoch
Moderator
Apr 25, 2006, 8:33 PM
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In reply to: You wake up with an imprint of a wall hammer on your face. You actually have fallen while you slept. (Portal ledge)
~~Classic~~
:robert:
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jeapord
Apr 25, 2006, 8:36 PM
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all of your sexual comments can be traced back to climbing lingo.
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superbum
Apr 30, 2006, 4:31 PM
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you check out a girl's forearms BEFORE her other, ahem, attributes.
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token_redneck
Apr 30, 2006, 6:26 PM
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~When you see a white powdery substance under a buddies nose and know exactly what he's been doing....
~Campus is a verb
~You get pissed if your hands start feeling smooth
~Your boss asks you to climb two stories up to Hang a Banner because he knows you climb, then you accept a Case of beer as "Hazard" pay.
~You dream of the day you can do a one finger, one arm pull up.
~You feet have a permanent funk to them from your climbing shoes.
The fact you actually read through 17 pages of this thread and still had something to add to the list.
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chalkfree
Apr 30, 2006, 8:27 PM
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If you've ever been under a manmade tower at midnight, thinking about racking up for it.
Extra Credit: If you were with climbing buddies.
Double Points: If you were considering taking up aid climbing to get up the featureless piece of shit after it wouldn't go free.
More Extra Credit: If you lied to your girlfriend when you got home because you knew she wouldn't appreciate nailing up a building or the money you're going to spend on pins.
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cal_gundert05
Apr 30, 2006, 8:59 PM
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...you look at the girl in the climbing poster more than the girl in the swimsuit calendar hanging beside it
(this is 100% true for me)
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t.vegas
Deleted
May 8, 2006, 7:44 AM
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You build a hauling ratchet system out of those key hanger biners and para cord and haul your pack with it just to see if it would work....
(it does)
Youre a house DJ in Vegas and you are spinnin and reading this thread at the same time :lol:
Hope the boss dont catch me lol
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climberbabe79
May 8, 2006, 12:34 PM
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You haven't seen your best mate in a year cos she's been overseas and you blow her off when she gets back cos the time she wants to see you is when you're climbing.
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spceal_ed
May 8, 2006, 3:21 PM
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You have actually had you truck searched by the school SRO after some admin looked in it and saw a bag of chalk. :roll: That was fun :evil:
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machino
May 8, 2006, 3:48 PM
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You might be a climber if you rock climb. Enough already.
noobs
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nightlion
May 8, 2006, 4:37 PM
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In reply to: You might be a climber if you rock climb. Enough already. noobs
So, does that mean that if you ice climb your not a climber? And, what about tree climbing? Would you still be a climber?
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machino
May 8, 2006, 5:00 PM
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Forget it. Indulge in yourselves being climbers (of anything). It sounds great doesnt it.
You might be a noob if you posted with a rediculous "you might be a climber if I talk all day about climbing but dont climb" posts.
Yeah, you.
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hoofers_andy
Jul 25, 2006, 10:56 PM
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you told your friend that you onsighted his mom last night
...and he understood the insult
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brizza
Jul 25, 2006, 11:54 PM
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You get the urge to chalk up when the steering wheel gets a little sweaty.
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heavydude
Jul 26, 2006, 12:20 AM
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When you give clients short appointments if they complain that there is only R & I to read in the waiting room. And then give free extra time to those that compliment you on your choice of magz.
When clients would rather talk about climbing than their medical condition
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krusher4
Jul 26, 2006, 12:53 AM
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You know if your at work late RC.com is actually a pretty fast site as many of the users have gone home/left work to climb.
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johnnybird
Jul 26, 2006, 1:02 AM
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you tried to sit start and boulder a shopping cart.
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tradrenn
Jul 26, 2006, 1:33 AM
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8^)
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sprog
Jul 27, 2006, 5:43 AM
Post #271 of 303
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when you have "tested" all the climbing shoes at the local REI just to climb the pinnacle because it keeps on raining and you
haven't yet gotten gotten desperate enough (or the money) for a gym membership
when you get really ticked off at the REI people for yelling "get down! no climbing above three feet when testing shoes!" just as you reach the crux move
you name your band "Anchors for Rescue" after the chapter in Mountaineering: the freedom of the hills
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ajkclay
Jul 27, 2006, 11:40 PM
Post #272 of 303
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Your friends don't mind you taking your nuts out to play with
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fenix83
Moderator
Jul 28, 2006, 6:57 PM
Post #273 of 303
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In reply to: you told your friend that you onsighted his mom last night ...and he understood the insult
In reply to: the best use of google earth you can think of is for scouring your local hills for new bouldering and slacklining spots...
Brilliant!
-when chalk is one of your basic food groups.
-when being late, and having white powder of you means your SO will be pissed, even though she knows it isn't coke
-when you friends don't mind if you play with their nuts
-when your girlfriend doesn't mind if you oggle/plaay with another girl's rack.
-F
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localshredder
Oct 9, 2006, 5:52 AM
Post #274 of 303
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- you mono your shopping bags on the way out of the grocery store.
- you can pick up a twelve pack with your thumb and pointerfinger
- you yell "I'm all out of friends and my nuts are too small" and nobody laughs
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the_climber
Oct 26, 2006, 7:48 PM
Post #275 of 303
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You have a fight with your S.O. and get told I don't want to see you tomorrow and right away you reach for the phone, call your partner and say..... "Hey, dude! Steller news, I'm free for climbing tomorrow!"
:lol:
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ninja_climber
Oct 26, 2006, 8:15 PM
Post #276 of 303
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In reply to: You have actually had you truck searched by the school SRO after some admin looked in it and saw a bag of chalk. :roll: That was fun :evil:
I had that happen 2 days ago...not pleasant...They brought in a drug puppy...
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thespider
Oct 26, 2006, 8:34 PM
Post #277 of 303
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...You keep a pair of nail clippers on your person at all times.
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anykineclimb
Oct 26, 2006, 8:37 PM
Post #278 of 303
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In reply to: In reply to: You have actually had you truck searched by the school SRO after some admin looked in it and saw a bag of chalk. :roll: That was fun :evil: I had that happen 2 days ago...not pleasant...They brought in a drug puppy...
same reason I didn't take chalk with me to Singapore!
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coolklimber
Oct 26, 2006, 9:03 PM
Post #279 of 303
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In reply to: You log on to climbing sites instead of doing your homework.
Thats what Im doing right now:)
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maxtrax
Oct 26, 2006, 10:06 PM
Post #280 of 303
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you read all 19 pages of this while listening to your "sending music"
grab your girlfriends ass, smirk at her and say "hey nice sloper"
go to whistler for a mountain biking weekend and start bitching about not bringing your climbing gear before you've even gotten to squamish
spend an eveing trying to figure out how to con your friends out of their racks so you have enough gear to go solo aid for the weekend.
all your dishes are dirty but your titanium spork and aluminum bowl are clean/ready for the next trip.
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nutstuffer
Oct 27, 2006, 12:32 AM
Post #281 of 303
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you read guide books while driving
you eat powder milk sandwiches
your fingers remained taped
when you daydream your doing sequences in your head
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col
Oct 27, 2006, 1:05 AM
Post #282 of 303
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In reply to: When you give clients short appointments if they complain that there is only R & I to read in the waiting room. And then give free extra time to those that compliment you on your choice of magz. When clients would rather talk about climbing than their medical condition
Yesterday I was in a waiting room, and there was nothing by 'womens weekly" and "property invester" I was wishing for R&I....
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acherry
Nov 30, 2006, 9:05 PM
Post #283 of 303
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- You won't date men that don't climb.
- You've bouldered at 1am by lantern light in Maine because that's when low tide happened that day.
- You're partner can always manage to hitch a ride off of Cathedral by explaining, "How the rope got up there," or,"How those little metal things work," to the tourists.
- You won a bottle of wine from your boss because he didn't think you could do 10 pull ups on his office door frame.
- Stilleto heels are waaaaaay more comfortable than your climbing shoes
- You've epoxied pebbles to your basement walls just to test out new shoes
- You went to Vegas for a ladies drinking weekend and didn't see your friends the whole time because you ditched them to go to Red Rocks.
- You can vouch for the fact that your gym manager's chimney goes at V1
- You stem your pantry because your too short to reach the camp-food shelf
- Your broken big toes conveniently healed such that they fit your climbing shoes much better (not me... Eric)
- You've gone several weeks showering only under waterfalls.
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metalhead
Nov 30, 2006, 9:47 PM
Post #284 of 303
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....all of your belts are old webbing....
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schveety
Nov 30, 2006, 10:24 PM
Post #285 of 303
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You go to Las Vegas for something other than the booze, gambling, oh yeah and hookers...........
(This post was edited by schveety on Nov 30, 2006, 10:24 PM)
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n57flyguy
Dec 1, 2006, 12:24 AM
Post #286 of 303
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[quote "coolklimber"][quote]You log on to climbing sites instead of doing your homework.[/quote]
Thats what Im doing right now:)[/quote]
I hear ya...
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ltj999
Dec 1, 2006, 1:15 AM
Post #287 of 303
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when you take a break from doing homework you put on your climbing shoes and try to boulder the cracks between the cinderblocks in your dorm room.
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the_peak_bagger
Dec 1, 2006, 9:15 PM
Post #288 of 303
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your 15 and you have to get a second jod to afford the next peace of gear for your rack ;) (thats me )
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camerona91
Dec 1, 2006, 9:56 PM
Post #289 of 303
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You might be an aid-climber if:
Your keychain is a broken copperhead.
You might be a climber if:
75% of the emails in your inbox are from your climbing buddies (and you don't erase them because they might have useful beta).
Your (non-climbing) social life is dependent on bad weather.
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dharmatreez
Dec 2, 2006, 12:32 AM
Post #290 of 303
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...your safe driving skills go out the window with any rock bigger than a fridge along the side of the road (who knows, there could be more)
...you are fine with chalk as a condiment at lunch
...your keychain always contains something old from your rack
...you always are in NEED of gear (whether true or not)
...your hands generally look like you have been bare knuckle brawling at the pub (continuely from March to October)
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dripdry
Dec 5, 2006, 3:21 AM
Post #291 of 303
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... in some of your spare time you (and your climbing partner) change the lyrics of songs (Tom Petty is good for this) so that they have something to do with climbing. May I recommend "Free Falling" ?
... some burly guy in a business meeting tries to crush your hand while shaking it, and you just casually smile as you clamp down.
... you tell work you're doing a marketing event and buy a table at a local climbing competition, not because you're a gear vendor [you're a financial planner], but because you want an excuse to skip work and watch the comp.
... you get "creative" around the holidays in order to give neat gifts while still having enough to buy gear.
... you hang your stocking with a locker, just in case "Santa" finally decides to bring you that portaledge.
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dan2see
Dec 5, 2006, 4:38 AM
Post #292 of 303
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Your wife buys you some 7mm static cord for Xmas, and you sit and play with prusiks all night while she watches TV.
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rhaig
Dec 5, 2006, 3:52 PM
Post #293 of 303
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dripdry wrote: . ... some burly guy in a business meeting tries to crush your hand while shaking it, and you just casually smile as you clamp down.
it's surprising how often I get that one. Not at work, but at Boy Scout events. Bunch of macho dads trying to give crushing handshakes. Firm? good. Crushing? don't know what you're in for.
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curtis_g
Dec 5, 2006, 6:41 PM
Post #294 of 303
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rhaig wrote: dripdry wrote: . ... some burly guy in a business meeting tries to crush your hand while shaking it, and you just casually smile as you clamp down. it's surprising how often I get that one. Not at work, but at Boy Scout events. Bunch of macho dads trying to give crushing handshakes. Firm? good. Crushing? don't know what you're in for.
yup, I've been there plenty of times, haha.
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treddy
Dec 7, 2006, 6:47 PM
Post #295 of 303
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you hang bootie nuts as ornaments from your christmas tree.
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blueeyedclimber
Dec 8, 2006, 12:55 AM
Post #296 of 303
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-you don't need any more trad gear, so you say that you are going to take up aid just to get more gear for Christmas.
-you don't want to visit the in-laws just because they moved to Florida.
-you only see your non-climbing friends during the winter
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humancrashpad
Dec 8, 2006, 1:28 AM
Post #297 of 303
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... you want to post a reply but don't have enough time to come up with a something witty (your friends are in the car honking the horn because they want to leave for the crags).
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travelguy
Dec 8, 2006, 7:03 PM
Post #298 of 303
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When you pick up a heavy object, you extend your opposite arm to counterbalance
When you are in a foreign country and see an attractive female, you say, I think I know you-are you a rock cilmber-and she is! (happened last month in Buenos Aires)
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rc86
Dec 8, 2006, 10:14 PM
Post #299 of 303
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...when all ur "non-climbing" friends look at you like your crazy when you say "i wonder if i can climb up that wall" and then do it
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humancrashpad
Dec 9, 2006, 9:11 PM
Post #301 of 303
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...when you see this thread and can't seem to resist picking through your own personal experiences.
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pgdarmi
Dec 11, 2006, 6:48 PM
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you met your spouse at the crag (yup.) 
you go climbing on your first date. (what else?)
you and your bride manage to get in a couple of pitches before the wedding guests arrive (did that!) 
you honeymoon in Krabi (did that too!) 
you and spouse decide not to have kids because it would make road-tripping inconvenient. 
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erin
Dec 11, 2006, 9:18 PM
Post #303 of 303
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Registered: Jul 27, 2005
Posts: 149
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[quote "ninjaslut"]....you're still adding lines to this freaking ancient thread![/quote]
It's like the Energizer Bunny...it keeps going and going and going....
It's getting funnier every year :)
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