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spydermonkey
Sep 6, 2002, 6:51 PM
Post #26 of 68
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Registered: Jul 21, 2002
Posts: 1151
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"Is that a real gun???" (Famous saying from someone who is stoned)
I heard it on the TV show COPS once. Idiot!
spyder
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wildtrail
Sep 6, 2002, 7:16 PM
Post #27 of 68
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"Well, if I have to come with you, you could at least let me finish smoking this."
"I call shotgun!"
"Can I drive?"
"Wow! That's a big stick. Should I assume the position?"
As the officer is giving you your body cavity search, turn around and run you fingers through his hair and say, "My place or yours?"
During the body cavity search say, "Don't you think we should be introduced first?"
Okay, that's enough to that. I'm starting to gross myself out!
"My we seem cranky today. Have we not gotten our fill of coffee and doughnuts, pig?"
"Su-su-su-suuuuueeeeyy!"
Steve
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noosphere
Sep 6, 2002, 7:32 PM
Post #28 of 68
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Registered: Aug 7, 2002
Posts: 329
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"Climbinganne did it."
"You're some ugly ass strippers"
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pushfurther
Sep 6, 2002, 7:36 PM
Post #29 of 68
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Registered: Oct 17, 2001
Posts: 2112
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wildtrail..
during the body cavity search you should say, "the least you could do is kiss me on the neck when you do that.."
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hangerlessbolt
Sep 6, 2002, 7:44 PM
Post #30 of 68
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Registered: Dec 2, 2001
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Yikes...that gives a "hole" new meaning to "Pushfurther"...
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wildtrail
Sep 6, 2002, 7:46 PM
Post #31 of 68
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!!!!!
He got ya push!
Hey push, yeah. That's a good idea. "Perhaps you could caress me a little more. I need romance, not just lust!"
Noosphere,
Love it "You sure are some ugly ass strippers!"
Steve
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noosphere
Sep 6, 2002, 7:49 PM
Post #32 of 68
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Registered: Aug 7, 2002
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HeHe
"I thought police were supposed to be in shape?"
"I don't think this is fair, my gun here is way bigger then yours!"
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noosphere
Sep 6, 2002, 7:51 PM
Post #33 of 68
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Free Mummia Abu Jamal!
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hangerlessbolt
Sep 6, 2002, 7:55 PM
Post #34 of 68
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Registered: Dec 2, 2001
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"You wanna f*** with me? Okay. You wanna play rough? Okay. Say hello to my lil' friend!!"
(Followed by heavy machine-gun fire)
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calamity_chk
Sep 6, 2002, 7:59 PM
Post #35 of 68
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Registered: Apr 23, 2002
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lol .. haha .. push, hahah .. perhaps you could "instruct" him on how like your cavity to be searched .. "a little to the left, more up the center, a little more ... ahhh, that's it, there ya go .."
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hangerlessbolt
Sep 6, 2002, 8:02 PM
Post #36 of 68
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Yes, communication between partners is vital to an enjoyable experience.
LMAO!!
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hangerlessbolt
Sep 6, 2002, 8:04 PM
Post #37 of 68
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"If my answers frighten you, then you should cease asking scary questions.
-Pulp Fiction
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wildtrail
Sep 6, 2002, 8:07 PM
Post #38 of 68
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Posts: 11063
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"Hey fat boy! You just finish a pie eatin' contest?"
"There are three sizes of people on this planet. Small, Medium, and Have A Freakin' Salad For Christ's Sake! You aren't the first two."
Grabbing your baggy of cocaine and throwing it out the window or down the toilet say, "Come on boy! Come on! Go get it! Go get it! That's a good boy!"
As you call out to your wife in between lines while the cops stand at the front door:
"Honey?"
"Yes, dear?"
"What's for dinner?"
"Pork!"
"Don't your assholes know how to knock?"
Steve
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wildtrail
Sep 6, 2002, 8:13 PM
Post #39 of 68
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"Were you born in a friggin' barn? Shut the door dammit!"
"Honey. Get the camera. I want my beating on tape."
"Good. You're out of your cars. This means I can run and get away you lazy ass!"
"If you don't put that gun down, I'm gonna shoot this dog!"
"Guys! Take it easy. I only shot my wife. You're married men, you should understand!"
"So she's only 16. I paid her good money to be in this video!"
"Hey! Pass that over here!"
"Hi guys. Take your shoes off and relax. I'll have this stuff cut up in a minute."
Steve
[ This Message was edited by: wildtrail on 2002-09-06 14:44 ]
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toobigtoclimb
Sep 6, 2002, 10:26 PM
Post #40 of 68
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Registered: Dec 14, 2001
Posts: 426
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"Cut! Cut! Cut!!!!...O.K. guys...one more time...with feeling...and remember your motivation....you ARE the law...go out and try again....O.K....quiet on the set.....speed....lights.....ACTION!"
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calamity_chk
Sep 6, 2002, 10:28 PM
Post #41 of 68
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Registered: Apr 23, 2002
Posts: 7994
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.. still laughing ..
"Honey. Get the camera. I want my beating on tape."
"Good. You're out of your cars. This means I can run and get away you lazy ass!"
"Hi guys. Take your shoes off and relax. I'll have this stuff cut up in a minute."
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pushfurther
Sep 6, 2002, 10:58 PM
Post #42 of 68
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Registered: Oct 17, 2001
Posts: 2112
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would you mind holding off this vein?
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wildtrail
Sep 6, 2002, 11:45 PM
Post #43 of 68
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Dammit push!
I was just going to do that one.
"Hey guys. Which do you recommend? The the bong or the pipe?"
"Time out! Do over! My gun wasn't loaded!"
"No, no, no! I didn't rape anybody. I just ate them. Jeez, you guys are sick!"
"Baby? What *buuurrpp* baby?"
"Hey! Wipe your damn feet!"
"So you finally figured it out. Good for you!"
"See guys. I told you cops weren't stupid. They found half of the stuff!"
"If I were to, say, drop this 1,000 dollars would you, say, go away?"
"How about you turn around and leave and I won't tell your boss you smoke this stuff with me on weekends." (I know lots of cops that smoke *hint, hint*)
"Ooooo goody! Now I can be violated!"
"Well, isn't that a cute uniform." (said with a lisp)
"You do know a man in uniform turns me on don't you?"
"Can we play 'Cops & Robbers'?"
"Can we play 'Bad Cop, Good Cop'?"
"Can we play 'Bad Cop, Naughty Cop'?"
"Ooooo baby, frisk me!"
"Hey! I didn't kill anyone, dammit! I gave that jerk six warning shots to the head! He had it comin'!"
Steve
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bumblesbounce
Sep 7, 2002, 12:19 AM
Post #44 of 68
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Registered: Dec 1, 2001
Posts: 472
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Um, what did I do wrong? Don't you want the house next door? (As you point to the woods)
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beyond_gravity
Sep 7, 2002, 12:21 AM
Post #45 of 68
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Registered: Jan 2, 2002
Posts: 5078
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Turn down the music? It's only 1:30am (blast F*ck the police)
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jono13
Sep 7, 2002, 2:51 AM
Post #46 of 68
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Registered: Apr 10, 2001
Posts: 3286
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Ociffer! i swear to drunk im not god! i didnt hit car driving my anyone!
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climbingpride
Sep 7, 2002, 4:26 AM
Post #47 of 68
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Registered: Oct 6, 2001
Posts: 571
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Officer: *door knocked down* This is the INS!! We're here to arrest you because you...
1. hunt baby seals,
2. scubadive in sewage treatment ponds
3. are a drain on the economy
4. urinate Mulder and Scully's in the snow
5. are an illegal alien.
Spyder & Pride: No!... Justsendingits is the guy you want, he is in number 29 not 26.
Pride / Spyder
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justsendingits
Sep 7, 2002, 6:20 AM
Post #48 of 68
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Registered: Dec 29, 2001
Posts: 1070
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Pride-- I have a licences for #1,#2
Ok,so #3,#4 are true!
#5 My offset aliens are only illeagel when I climb at Hueco in the night!!
And I am not at #29,I am at #666
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jeepmonkey
Sep 7, 2002, 7:42 AM
Post #49 of 68
(1672 views)
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Registered: Dec 19, 2001
Posts: 386
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"Stay back, I have a gun."
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climbingpride
Sep 8, 2002, 1:05 AM
Post #50 of 68
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Registered: Oct 6, 2001
Posts: 571
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LOL
Great stuff!
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