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sub-zero
Dec 6, 2006, 10:48 PM
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What are the do's and don't do's? I have some friends who are interested and some who are not. Some of them want to try the sport but won't unless some other girl who will but you can't even pry her from the ground? Thanks, Later
-Shane
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trangtu
Dec 7, 2006, 6:26 AM
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Shane,
My .02--
-set up TRs on fun single-pitch climbs
-let the reluctant ones come and watch initially, if they're willing but not yet ready to try the climbing
-lots of encouragement and positive reinforcement
-when one of the girls does tie in for a first climb, let her weight the rope from a few feet off the ground, practice sitting in lowering position, etc.
-everybody's different, but find the right balance between encouraging someone to step a bit outside their comfort zone and allowing them to feel safe and supported
-initially, maybe tie in for the climber so she doesn't feel overwhelmed by new info (learning the knot, climbing movement, staying on route, lowering, etc..)..or else teach the tie-in knot in advance and let her practice before going to the crag
-absolutely no negativity or put-downs
Good luck!
Trang
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uasunflower
Dec 7, 2006, 2:50 PM
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drag them by the hair to the wall, then punch face-first into the wall, and for the last, give some penalty slack while lowering 
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sub-zero
Dec 7, 2006, 6:25 PM
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Thanks. Those are some great points. It's even harder because the winter is here. But we all might take a road trip during Christmas break and do some gym climbing or something. How long have you known about climbing Trangtu? Maybe that will tell me how long it took for you to attempt the sport and how long I could be waiting for. lol Have a great one, later
-Shane
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lena_chita
Moderator
Dec 7, 2006, 7:19 PM
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Climbing truly isn't for everyone. We love it so much, sometimes we forget that the MAJORITY of people aren't like us and there are people who not only wouldn't like it, but would HATE it.
I have tried to get a lot of my girl friends to try climbing b/c I thought it would be fun to have my friends like the same activity that I like. Only 3 women (out of a pool of 30 or so that I tried to "sell" rock-climbing to, in the early days when i thought that nobody could possibly NOT like it if they tried it esp. my friends) ever came with me to the gym to try it.
Out of those 3, only one came back for more on her own accord, and then tried to get her husband to try it, too. 2 years later, she is still climbing-- when she isn't getting injured. But it never seems to have become quite the same passion for her as it is for me. She likes it, and it is "good exercise" and "nice family activity". Neither her husband, nor her kids are all that excited about climbing, actually, though they aren't strongly averse to it either.
The second woman politely "liked it", and climbed well enough the one time she came along, but always had excuses when the chance of going again came up, so after a couple tries I left her in peace.
And the third girl was the most surprizing. She was the most enthuziastic about going with me. And then she had a panic attack 6 feet off the ground. And I mean REAL panic attack. She lost it completely. Needless to say, she hasn't been back.
I don't bother to actively get any of my friends into it anymore.
Some excuses that I've heard repeatedly and specifically from women: "I'm afraid of heights" and " I have no arm stregth whatsoever, are you kidding?" And the last one: "Oh, I couldn't... it makes your hands all rough and callused, doesn't it?"
LOL, if any of the guys are afraid of heights or worried about insufficient muscle strength or callused hands, they don't voice those concerns out loud, at least not to me. The guys usually say :"Boy, I'd love to, it sounds fun, but I'm so busy right now, KWIM? Maybe some other time? Just let me know, O>K.?"
My giess is that those female friends of yours have similar concerns, but since you are a guy, they don't go into details.
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sub-zero
Dec 9, 2006, 10:58 PM
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Because I'm a guy? lol Is that a sexest comment? Just joking. Yeah I've experienced that too but my theory also includes the awesome options for climbing because there are so many different types of climbing and there are a lot of games. But you're right some people will never try it. lol Thanks. How long have you been climbing and what got you into it? (Lena-Chita) or whoever? Later
-Shane
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lena_chita
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Dec 11, 2006, 5:31 PM
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I've been climbing seriously for 2.5 years. Tried it for the first time 9 years ago. A friend (guy) was a climber, His girlfriend was just starting to try it out. They were good friends of mine and I think were trying to draw me out b/c I was very depressed after losing a baby pretty far along into pregnancy.
The guy mentioned the climbing to my husband and me (He did not go into reasons why, just said: Hey, we are going, want to come along?). I loved the idea and immediately said yes. My husband was the more reluctant one, actually- he wasn't opposed to climbing, but didn't like the idea of getting up early ,driving somewhere, etc.
We both enjoyed climbing well enough to go back every time we were invited to come along, which was several times over a course of one summer. But the focus definitely wasn't on climbing at that point in our life. And it seemed that I was a bit more excited about climbing than my husband was at that time. It felt sometimes that he was only going for my sake, and that did put a damper on the whole thing a bit...
Then we moved away b/c of our jobs, had kids, and climbing seemed like part of long-forgotten care-free graduate school years. We never even talked about it, it was all in the past. Until my husband stumbled, for reasons still unclear to me, on a Russian rock-climbing website. One thing after another, some people on that Website were talking about a climbing trip to Utah in a years' time, and DH thought it would be fun. He mentioned it to me, and I said: Sure, but we don't really know how to climb, do we? those people sound serious... And what do we do about the kids, anyway? (my younger daughter was 1 yo at the time)
The truth is though, that I was so excited about it, that I didn't really think about how it would work out. I just couldn't believe that my husband really really wanted to do this, and I was afraid that it was all a dream and he would change his mind soon, LOL. We went out and bought harnesses and shoes without ever setting foot in the gym or even really knowing how to belay-- unless you count a bit of instruction that we had 9 years ago... (LOL, in the back of my mind, I was thinking that if we buy gear right away, my husband would be less likely to change his mind-- no danger of that, but I wasn't sure at the time)Then we took belay class and started climbing once a week at the gym. That trip that started it all never happened. But once a wqeek led to 2x a week, then 3x a week, then outside, then trips, and life hasn't been the same since then...
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sub-zero
Dec 11, 2006, 8:13 PM
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That's awesome. I miss climbing and I can't wait to get back into it. Reading your post leads me to another question. How do parents specifically mothers feel about their children starting to climb and especially at such a young age? Thanks, later
-Shane
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madgey28
Dec 11, 2006, 10:01 PM
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Registered: Jun 15, 2005
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Another comment I would add to this is that in general (and remember this is a VAST generalization, will not hold true in every case) that many women react differently to criticism than men do. If you watch college athletics at all, you will see this as well...Coaches will scream and yell at a guy and have it motivate them. From every sports team I have been on, that will NOT work with females.
In my personal experience, my closest guy climbing friends (even my male roommate) would yell at me when I wanted to give up at the crux of a climb. Their yelling did nothing but make me want to stop even sooner. When someone would yell something positive or encouraging to me (instead of the negative yelling), I was much more likely to try one or two more times to finish the move...
Just food for thought...
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teh_chariot
Dec 11, 2006, 10:09 PM
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Registered: Nov 27, 2006
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"Yeah look at me IM ripped. IM shane." Hers the do's chicks...heres the don'tz dudes. Obviously you are insecure about asking a girl to climbing with you. I just pick em up and make em go. Of course you get bitched at when you make em climb somthing. They get up on the rock and flip out. Ive even seen a girl pee her pants. In the end they are down with you. But, on the other hand Ive climbed with girls who are way better than I. So, i dont know what your problem is....looks to me like you are trying to get a g/f ./ climbing partner and dont want to screw up. Dood bake the chick a cake...if thats what you want....cuz I havent seen too many bad things happen out of that i.e Tommy Caldwell and Beth Rodden. I mean have you ever seen how she bitches at him the whole way up the route. I think If I were you i would either A) just climb, or B) quit taking pictures of myself and trying to pull a chick online. Really man, this is lame..........
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twaikker
Dec 11, 2006, 10:21 PM
Post #11 of 11
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Registered: Mar 1, 2005
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well shane here are a couple do's and do nots....
do....umm in your case your screwed, chicks dont want to climb with a gay dude, they only want them around for shopping. so stop trying to get a g/f through the climbing scene thats just hurt
now for some donts...
dont beg chicks to climb with you, makes you look desperate...which you are or you wouldnt be some shirtless pail ass little bitch trying to hook up with chicks on rc.com
you say some girls are interested and some arnt...that should be a clue right there big stud, they might be into climbing but they sure as hell aint into your faggitty ass.
so heres what you do...
1st: put a shirt on, you look sorry
2nd: dont climb to pull bitches, dont pull bitches to climb, climb for yourself and the dumb sluts will always be there
3rd: dont try and pick up chicks online, that is like chipping holds, its ugly and people do it
4th: stop being gay
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