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wa_hoo
Dec 13, 2004, 2:34 AM
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Most days I feel strong and confident when I gym climb. I apply the Rock Warrior approach to grow and learn for me which works great most of the time. I'm a bit older than most women climbers and have had a kid and lost a bunch of weight over the past couple years (which is all good, but there are some stubborn small tires left in the middle). I have to say I look good for my age and feel good about my strength.
So, some days I have a hard time feeling confident and I'm wondering what some of the rest of you do to get your head back in the right place.
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ratherbe
Dec 13, 2004, 2:54 AM
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This may sound terrible, but I get a lot of confidence from climbing with friends who are newer or not as strong as me. I think it's self centered of me to gain confidence from seeing someone else's weakness, but some of the confidence gained is from sharing my knowledge and love of the sport and helping someone get better.
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rosemom3
Dec 14, 2004, 6:40 AM
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Wa Hoo -
I try and remeber that climbing is about me, what my body can do and the rock. I try to avoid competing or comparing myself to others or I end up feeling bad. I love climbing and its about that and me pushing myself. The more I climb the better I feel and the stronger my head is. On lead which I am really working on - I try different things - like not to feel my emotions but remain calm then think about what I am doing and let my instincts kick in totally. It helps - I also let myself back off of stuff that freaks me out. I like to lead stuff that I have already top-roped. That is of course not the red-point macho way to do it but I have three kids and a fall takes me a long time to recover from if its bad. Yesturday I made some fingery ratchet moves at IC on Broken Tooth Wall that I couldn't do last spring - I was on top-rope but it was so cool just to see the little progress. Finger Cracks and Off-width are what I am working on what about you?
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granite_grrl
Dec 14, 2004, 12:30 PM
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In reply to: but some of the confidence gained is from sharing my knowledge and love of the sport and helping someone get better.
I was thinking about this when climbing witha new guy at the gym. It was only his second time ever in a gym (had taken up climbing last spring, was climbing outdoors till now), and it was awesome climbing with him and showing him little ways to be more effcient when climbing stuff he's not used to.
Sometimes it can drag a little too, sometimes I would like someone who climbs better than me to partner up with and be shown some new tricks.
Usually if I'm not feeling confident I wander away from the pack and strech out and calm my mind. I usually run a few laps on some bouldering problems after to get back in tune with my body. Or if I'm still not feeling good then I'll switch it up and set problems/routes or just do muscle training stuff (hang board, cruches, pushups, dips, etc. all that stuff we should do more of but we don't).
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cantbuymefriends
Dec 14, 2004, 2:50 PM
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In reply to: This may sound terrible, but I get a lot of confidence from climbing with friends who are newer or not as strong as me. I think it's self centered of me to gain confidence from seeing someone else's weakness, but some of the confidence gained is from sharing my knowledge and love of the sport and helping someone get better.
I often climb with friends who are newer, but they often turn out to be stronger and better than me anyway. Oh, well...
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kimmyt
Dec 14, 2004, 3:10 PM
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In reply to: In reply to: This may sound terrible, but I get a lot of confidence from climbing with friends who are newer or not as strong as me. I think it's self centered of me to gain confidence from seeing someone else's weakness, but some of the confidence gained is from sharing my knowledge and love of the sport and helping someone get better. I often climb with friends who are newer, but they often turn out to be stronger and better than me anyway. Oh, well...
Werd.
*sigh* I've been having problems lately, getting myself to the gym. It's winter here (or as good as...) and I just feel myself slipping into a winter stupor. I need to make myself go to the gym and motivate myself to get stronger. I have goals for next season, and I want to not flail like a newb after the off season. I think my problem is that the weather is depressing me. It's not ski season and it's not climbing season. That means I don't have anything to do but go to the gym (which I can't seem to do....) or sit around and mope.
My problem at the gym is that I go and boulder for a very short time, become frustrated with myself, and leave. I don't talk to anyone there (I don't see the point in being social when I'm essentially working out) but at the same time I feel that I would benefit from having a group of people around to support me when I'm having difficulties with a problem. I think my big problem is that I feel self-conscious at the gym, because I struggle on V0 problems when other people are struggling on much harder ones. I know many people say that you shouldn't care what others think, and I feel this way as well, but it's hard to tell yourself not to be self-conscious. Sometimes it's just a part of your psyche (or whatever).
K.
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wa_hoo
Dec 15, 2004, 3:02 AM
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Rosemom3-
It's nice to hear I'm not the only one with kids who tones down the risks but still feels like their gaining from the experience. I usually top-rope before I lead too and find it very helpful.
Good advice to keep the focus on my own growth and improvement - especially when I get in a bad mental place.
Thanks
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wa_hoo
Dec 15, 2004, 3:15 AM
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My problem at the gym is that I go and boulder for a very short time, become frustrated with myself, and leave. I don't talk to anyone there (I don't see the point in being social when I'm essentially working out) but at the same time I feel that I would benefit from having a group of people around to support me when I'm having difficulties with a problem. I think my big problem is that I feel self-conscious at the gym, because I struggle on V0 problems when other people are struggling on much harder ones. I know many people say that you shouldn't care what others think, and I feel this way as well, but it's hard to tell yourself not to be self-conscious. Sometimes it's just a part of your psyche (or whatever).
I hope the quote above works - I've never done it ...
Anyway - Since I began at struggling with V0's too let me offer this. It helps me to not look around when I'm there and just focus on what I'm doing. I don't really want to know who's watching. If they're nice, they'll chat a little politely, otherwise they stay away.
Also - the good part about being new is you have lots of ground to gain and I think the early ground gains come faster. I would suggest picking 3 or 4 fun problems at your gym and work on them each time. I find that if I do the same seemingly impossible move for a few days, but attempt it, one day soon I can do it!! Really! It comes faster than you'd think.
I think of it as slowly building each of the muscles and moves I'll need to be really good. This week it's this move, next week another move.
Good luck, just think how strong you're getting and how much younger you'll keep feeling! That helps me too!
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sapphire
Dec 15, 2004, 3:40 AM
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If I'm having a rough day or I've been struggling and flailing, I'll take it easy and do some nice, easy climbs just to remember how it feels to climb. Plus, it's a little ego boost to make it to the top, even if it's a few grades lower than I usually climb. Some days, it's just nice to finish something. After a few easy climbs, I've usually let go of some of the frustration that's built up and will either try again on the harder ones or realise i'm having an off day and take it easy the rest of the day.
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sapphire
Dec 15, 2004, 5:46 AM
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In reply to: My problem at the gym is that I go and boulder for a very short time, become frustrated with myself, and leave. I don't talk to anyone there (I don't see the point in being social when I'm essentially working out) but at the same time I feel that I would benefit from having a group of people around to support me when I'm having difficulties with a problem. I think my big problem is that I feel self-conscious at the gym, because I struggle on V0 problems when other people are struggling on much harder ones. I know many people say that you shouldn't care what others think, and I feel this way as well, but it's hard to tell yourself not to be self-conscious. Sometimes it's just a part of your psyche (or whatever). K.
Keep working those V0's! Pretty soon you'll get them! I started out bouldering 'cuz I had broken up with my climbing partner and wasn't up to meeting others to climb with. so i'd go and struggle on the V0's and also feel dumb and self-conscious. but I found a couple routes that intrigued me and looked doable so i worked those. There was one route in the big bouldering cave on which I spent 7 months working out, and they took it down before I ever finished it! It had about 10-12 moves to it. So of course by progressing, on average, about 1 move every 3 weeks (yeah, i know...a snail's pace), I eventually got the beginning part wired and flowing so smoothly. eventually, (probably 4-5 months into it) other climbers would come by and complete the climb, but by using some of the beta that I had spent months figuring out! wasn't that an ego-boost! i was pretty much a fixture in front of that cave, and the boulderers that saw me there regularly would know the problem i was working and would give encouragment and support. Over time, I grew stronger, gained better technique, and surprisingly, one day I realised I wasn't flailing on all the V0's anymore. There would even be newer climbers who would come and flail and even ask me for advice (as if I knew what i was doing!?!).
Soon after they took down my problem (sob!) I met a girl who told me that she'd see me sitting there in front of the cave staring at my problem and how cool she thought i was to be meditating there like that, when in reality i was really just tired, frustrated and wondering how the hell to do the next move! It really surprised me to hear that I appeared cool to somebody else. especially when i was flailing on a project i'd been working on for 7 months. of course, she didn't know i'd been working on it for 7 months...
anyhow, the points of my long-winded story...
1. Find a route/s that intrigue you and that looks fun to you. don't worry about the grade. play around on some v1's and v2's if you like. even if it's just one part of the problem that you can do or you have to skip the beginning moves. just find something that challenges you and is something that you want to climb. you'll hopefully focus more on how to work the moves and less on being self-conscious. Don't worry if it takes forever to get a move. Each time you hang on that hold, you build a little bit of strength. Each time you try a different approach to get that next hold, you work a little more technique.
2. Sometimes people's impression of you is different than your own impression of yourself. I've realised that there are people out there who would like to play on the boulders but are too self-conscious and too scared themselves to try it out. They tend to think that the people playing on the boulders are cool. Even if you are struggling on the V0's you are AWESOME for having the guts to be out there and doing it!
3. Most people start out struggling on V0's. Most people were horribly self-conscious at the time too. Nobody's going to make fun of you for it. And unless they are standing right there next to you, most people won't even know what the grade of the route is that you are on.
4. Keep at it! It may take time (like 7 months!), but eventually you'll get it!!!
anyhow, sorry to get off-topic from the original post, and I think i've gone a bit off from kimmy's post, but reading kimmy's post reminded me about when i first started bouldering. and I wanted to send some support and encouragment. 8^)
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climbsomething
Dec 15, 2004, 6:47 AM
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Aw. Poor kimmy! But you're a j_ung dancer- nobody at your gym can take that away! :)
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acacongua
Dec 15, 2004, 3:54 PM
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In reply to: This may sound terrible, but I get a lot of confidence from climbing with friends who are newer or not as strong as me. I think it's self centered of me to gain confidence from seeing someone else's weakness, but some of the confidence gained is from sharing my knowledge and love of the sport and helping someone get better.
It's not selfish at all. When you're the "alpha climber" of the group, you feel you have more responsibility to teach/help the other climbers. I do the same, although I love climbing with stronger people. It helps me learn!
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climbhigh2005
Dec 17, 2004, 3:50 AM
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In reply to: In reply to: This may sound terrible, but I get a lot of confidence from climbing with friends who are newer or not as strong as me. I think it's self centered of me to gain confidence from seeing someone else's weakness, but some of the confidence gained is from sharing my knowledge and love of the sport and helping someone get better. I often climb with friends who are newer, but they often turn out to be stronger and better than me anyway. Oh, well...
LOL I agree... I love climbing with people that arent as strong.. it boost my self confidence... however when I take new guys, they normally climb harder than me... kills me!
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granite_grrl
Dec 17, 2004, 2:34 PM
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In reply to: In reply to: In reply to: This may sound terrible, but I get a lot of confidence from climbing with friends who are newer or not as strong as me. I think it's self centered of me to gain confidence from seeing someone else's weakness, but some of the confidence gained is from sharing my knowledge and love of the sport and helping someone get better. I often climb with friends who are newer, but they often turn out to be stronger and better than me anyway. Oh, well... LOL I agree... I love climbing with people that arent as strong.. it boost my self confidence... however when I take new guys, they normally climb harder than me... kills me!
I have a friend I climb with who hasn't been able to get out very much in the past year, we go to the gym and he whoops my ass on the bouldering problems. I usually have to stick him on a route or two (I usally do a little better with routes than he does) to make me feel a little better :wink:
While it's good to work on your weaknesses, sometimes its nice to exploit your strengths!
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jdouble
Dec 17, 2004, 2:51 PM
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.02 more cents......
Your feeling of not being satisfied with your current level will never end. There will always be somebody better, you will always have bad days.
Realize this, mentally get yourself over it, and climb on!
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rosemom3
Dec 19, 2004, 5:11 AM
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In reply to: In reply to: I think my big problem is that I feel self-conscious at the gym, because I struggle on V0 problems when other people are struggling on much harder ones. I know many people say that you shouldn't care what others think, and I feel this way as well, but it's hard to tell yourself not to be self-conscious. Sometimes it's just a part of your psyche (or whatever). K. Keep working those V0's! Pretty soon you'll get them! I started out bouldering 'cuz I had broken up with my climbing partner and wasn't up to meeting others to climb with. so i'd go and struggle on the V0's and also feel dumb and self-conscious. ... Over time, I grew stronger, gained better technique, and surprisingly, one day I realised I wasn't flailing on all the V0's anymore. 8^)
This really meant a lot to me. "The cave" at our local gym is dominated by teenage boys who seem to hold onto nothing - its a 45% overhang. I usually don't even go in there but I know if I ever want to climb any overhangs at Rifle I will have to master some of those moves. They are supportive when I try, but its really frustrating and overwhelming. The idea that I can take seven months to get something suddenly made it much more approachable. So I have my eye out for an emptier cave when I can just go in and mess around without expecting so much of myself and without an audience. Thanks for sharing!
Here's to skidding into old age coffee cup in one hand and a roll of tape in the other- complete with skid marks on my bottom and hands scarred from crack climbing.
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paige
Dec 21, 2004, 1:07 AM
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[quote="kimmyt"][quote="cantbuymefriends"]In reply to: I think my problem is that the weather is depressing me. It's not ski season and it's not climbing season. That means I don't have anything to do but go to the gym K.
I know :( I just want to be able to do something outside, but it is suposed to snow tonight!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! very excited!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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charley
Dec 25, 2004, 10:19 PM
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For all of you that think you climb poorly, I have a friend who is a mathimatician and he says," Ya know that almost half the time you climb at less than your average." :lol:
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wa_hoo
Dec 27, 2004, 2:54 AM
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I just read something in another forum that made me realize how critical we are of ourselves. I think men are competitive and that in the moment they are very hard on themselves. But it seems they let it go easier than we do.
I'm going to try just having fun and not judging myself so much. Remember why I climb (because I love how I feel when it flows, how I feel strong, I like how I can move my body, etc), enjoy routes regardless of rating, and just have fun.
Of course it's easy to say, but come on, wouldn't it feel better too?! I bet we'd be climbing better if we put all our energy into enjoying the climb and focusing on what we're doing and not all the mental stuff.
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