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petsfed
Feb 13, 2009, 2:02 AM
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I wondered, while belaying my girlfriend on the southwest dihedral on the Whale's Tail in Eldo, what other people's experiences with climbing while dating.
So, without further ado, what are your best, and worst, experiences blending your romantic life with your climbing life?
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doons
Feb 13, 2009, 2:31 AM
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maybe you should leave rockclimbing.com and go ask this at Yahoo! personals instead.
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colatownkid
Feb 13, 2009, 2:54 AM
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petsfed wrote: I wondered, while belaying my girlfriend on the southwest dihedral on the Whale's Tail in Eldo, what other people's experiences with climbing while dating. So, without further ado, what are your best, and worst, experiences blending your romantic life with your climbing life?
i'm going to marry her. i consider this to be incredibly awesome.
my only complaint is that it really highlights any time we have bad days as climbing partners. on the plus side, i almost always have a partner. it's also done great things for the relationship, what with her constantly saving my life.
overall, i'd say it's been a positive experience.
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Myxomatosis
Feb 13, 2009, 3:00 AM
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Hahaha.. well my now xgf told me that she liked me at belay station on the 2nd pitch with her current bf on the deck below us....
Turns out they had broken up a few days before but at the time I had no idea...... I just concentrated on the climbing.. what else was I meant to do 
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nkane
Feb 13, 2009, 3:09 AM
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For comparison, it's somewhat easier on a relationship than mountain biking on a tandem.
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curt
Feb 13, 2009, 4:59 AM
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petsfed wrote: I wondered, while belaying my girlfriend on the southwest dihedral on the Whale's Tail in Eldo, what other people's experiences with climbing while dating. So, without further ado, what are your best, and worst, experiences blending your romantic life with your climbing life?
Well, here's a fitting comment from my old boss and climbing partner:
Steve Wunsch wrote: There are all kind of values to be gotten out of climbing. Sometimes you can take a girlfriend up a climb and get laid for it.
Curt
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angry
Feb 13, 2009, 5:47 AM
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petsfed wrote: I wondered, while belaying my girlfriend on the southwest dihedral on the Whale's Tail in Eldo, what other people's experiences with climbing while dating. So, without further ado, what are your best, and worst, experiences blending your romantic life with your climbing life?
Currently I'm dating a girl who climbs and I'm very happy about it.
Hands down, the absolute worst person I've ever dated, one of the worst I've ever met, was also a climber.
As much as it is climbing, it isn't about climbing.
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i_h8_choss
Feb 13, 2009, 6:03 AM
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petsfed wrote: I wondered, while belaying my girlfriend on the southwest dihedral on the Whale's Tail in Eldo, what other people's experiences with climbing while dating. So, without further ado, what are your best, and worst, experiences blending your romantic life with your climbing life?
the climber i used to date had a nice truck, liked to travel and take time off work, she also had a very clean and organized rack and she carried one of those organic full pads. nice girl but had to dump her. then i married a non rock-climber, whom ill probably teach how to belay this summer. ahhhh...the sweet side of rc.com.
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Craggmire
Feb 13, 2009, 6:32 AM
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I taught my ex-girlfriend to climb and now we always run into each other at the gym...It's really awkward. And everytime i see here there i want to tackle her and take back one of my prized Petzel biners thats on her chalk bag. I mean they're only ten bucks but come on! its a Spirit!
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swoopee
Feb 13, 2009, 8:10 AM
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i_h8_choss wrote: petsfed wrote: I wondered, while belaying my girlfriend on the southwest dihedral on the Whale's Tail in Eldo, what other people's experiences with climbing while dating. So, without further ado, what are your best, and worst, experiences blending your romantic life with your climbing life? the climber i used to date had a nice truck, liked to travel and take time off work, she also had a very clean and organized rack and she carried one of those organic full pads. nice girl but had to dump her. then i married a non rock-climber, whom ill probably teach how to belay this summer. ahhhh...the sweet side of rc.com.
Okey, clean is good but how did she organize her rack???
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moditup
Feb 13, 2009, 8:33 AM
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swoopee wrote: i_h8_choss wrote: petsfed wrote: I wondered, while belaying my girlfriend on the southwest dihedral on the Whale's Tail in Eldo, what other people's experiences with climbing while dating. So, without further ado, what are your best, and worst, experiences blending your romantic life with your climbing life? the climber i used to date had a nice truck, liked to travel and take time off work, she also had a very clean and organized rack and she carried one of those organic full pads. nice girl but had to dump her. then i married a non rock-climber, whom ill probably teach how to belay this summer. ahhhh...the sweet side of rc.com. Okey, clean is good but how did she organize her rack???
left one left, right one right.
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camhead
Feb 13, 2009, 1:14 PM
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angry wrote: petsfed wrote: I wondered, while belaying my girlfriend on the southwest dihedral on the Whale's Tail in Eldo, what other people's experiences with climbing while dating. So, without further ado, what are your best, and worst, experiences blending your romantic life with your climbing life? Currently I'm dating a girl who climbs and I'm very happy about it. Hands down, the absolute worst person I've ever dated, one of the worst I've ever met, was also a climber. As much as it is climbing, it isn't about climbing.
I dated a girl for a couple years who climbed, but with much different objectives than me. We did ALL the date climbs. Nutcracker, Bastile Crack, North Chimney of Castleton, everything. I would lead all pitches. It got old. When we started dating, she was just breaking into .11 sport, but had serious lead head issues and actually regressed quite a bit during the time we were together. By the end of the whole thing, we spent two weeks in Mexico and barely even climbed with each other, ad it was awesome. But, for the most part, I fit EVERYTHING I wanted to climb around her, and it sucked. I shot up nearly a number grade after we splitzed.
With my now-wife, I am not sure that we have ever had a "date climb." We have very similar objectives, and it is merely going out cragging with our own projects. And it has always been like this. Fuck *date* climbs. Just climbing with your significant other is way better.
That is awl.
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fitzontherocks
Feb 13, 2009, 2:03 PM
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I had to read the OP's original question-- it was about blending climbing and romance and I would have to say it was our 20th wedding anniversary trip to Italy. After much debate, we decided to bring the kids (4, 9 and 13) and we spent a day high above Amalfi at a local crag. While the climbing was overwhelmingly average, the setting and the vibe were the best. Unbelievable scenery, surrounded by fun loving Italian families (from gramma belaying, to 3 year olds roping up), the drunk Irish artist, and the four people I love most in the world. At this point I should say that my wife doesn't climb. So she made new friends, checked out the 16th century towers, and would come to the routes and cheer us on occasionally. One of my daughters climbed with me that day, and I climbed with a Neapolitan I met through rc.com. It was a good day. Romantic, yes, in a certain way. Memorable? Yes. I'll carry that day to my grave.
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granite_grrl
Feb 13, 2009, 2:27 PM
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My husband and I met on a climbing trip.
Best thing is that I have someone around me that's always up to go climbing for the day, ready and excited to get out for the weekend or after work, dispite all the driving we have to do. Also, when it comes to vacation time its always going to be a climbing trip.
Worst thing is that's hard to find other climbing partners that are as serious as we are and want to spend as much time climbing as we do in the area around us. So we're almost always climbing with each other...and everyone loves the tiffs that climbing couples can get into at the crags.
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krusher4
Feb 13, 2009, 2:42 PM
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OW climbing in Vedauwoo not a good date/climbing weekend..unless you like to nurse eachothers wounds.
but you could say...."I've got my "Big Gear" right here.....you wanna hold it?"
(This post was edited by krusher4 on Feb 13, 2009, 2:44 PM)
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petsfed
Feb 13, 2009, 2:45 PM
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granite_grrl wrote: My husband and I met on a climbing trip. Best thing is that I have someone around me that's always up to go climbing for the day, ready and excited to get out for the weekend or after work, dispite all the driving we have to do. Also, when it comes to vacation time its always going to be a climbing trip. Worst thing is that's hard to find other climbing partners that are as serious as we are and want to spend as much time climbing as we do in the area around us. So we're almost always climbing with each other...and everyone loves the tiffs that climbing couples can get into at the crags.
That is the primary concern I've always had about climbing with a girlfriend.
Fortunately, I have tons of other partners for when the weather gets good and I get really motivated. At the moment, I'm just fine with leading all the pitches on a bunch of relatively easy climbs. Most of my other partners don't really like to climb at all on their rest days, much less a bunch of easy routes and I prefer climbing to totally-inactive-rest-days, so this works well for me. Plus, she'll be in France during the primo Wyoming season, so I'll not be climbing with her when I'm in my best shape.
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petsfed
Feb 13, 2009, 2:48 PM
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krusher4 wrote: OW climbing in Vedauwoo not a good date/climbing weekend..unless you like to nurse eachothers wounds. but you could say...."I've got my "Big Gear" right here.....you wanna hold it?"
Ok, so a while back, I dated this girl who claimed that she enjoyed climbing. I was on a big offwidth kick at the time, so if it was fat, I was on that shit (which in retrospect, probably affected my taste in women at the time, but I digress). We'd been seeing each other for a week and half, so I elected to take her out to Lower Slot Right. Not too hard, but no giveaway either. No joke, she started crying before she even left the ground. And this was the third time that week that I'd made her cry. And somehow, I'd already met her folks.
I bailed.
(This post was edited by petsfed on Feb 13, 2009, 2:50 PM)
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fitzontherocks
Feb 13, 2009, 3:08 PM
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I assume you mean on the chick, not the OW.
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Wunderkind
Feb 13, 2009, 3:16 PM
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Best: Alfacar crag near Granada was pretty sweet and about the perfect day (except for a 20 ft lead fall on about the slabbiest route I've ever climbed - the kind of fall where you just smear your face all the way down). BUT, we climbed without any concern for the grades b/c we weren't really sure what our capabilities were and how the grades ran in Spain, so it was just about looking for routes that were interesting. My wife did her first sport lead that day as well, which was great to be there for.
Worst: Gym climbing with her when I'm in a bad mood and falling off easy stuff. This is especially bad if she does yoga for the first two hours and I'm ready to leave before she has started.
(This post was edited by Wunderkind on Feb 13, 2009, 3:17 PM)
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krusher4
Feb 13, 2009, 3:19 PM
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petsfed wrote: krusher4 wrote: OW climbing in Vedauwoo not a good date/climbing weekend..unless you like to nurse eachothers wounds. but you could say...."I've got my "Big Gear" right here.....you wanna hold it?" Ok, so a while back, I dated this girl who claimed that she enjoyed climbing. I was on a big offwidth kick at the time, so if it was fat, I was on that shit (which in retrospect, probably affected my taste in women at the time, but I digress). We'd been seeing each other for a week and half, so I elected to take her out to Lower Slot Right. Not too hard, but no giveaway either. No joke, she started crying before she even left the ground. And this was the third time that week that I'd made her cry. And somehow, I'd already met her folks. I bailed.
Thats a great story! I love how you made her cry 3 times in one week LOL.
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krusher4
Feb 13, 2009, 3:20 PM
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did anyone see the "Clucking" post on mountainproject a few weeks back?
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camhead
Feb 13, 2009, 3:47 PM
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Clucking? Really? Never heard of it.
Hey has anyone heard abut these Chuck Norris Jokes? Or Icanhazmeatbombz?
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Carnage
Feb 13, 2009, 3:47 PM
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i took this girl i was interested to the local TR crag. we warmed up on some easy stuff, everyone (total in the group was about 6). so i had been the week before and sent this route(near my limit) on TR so i wanted to get it on lead. didnt tell em the diff between TR and lead, but i didnt expect to fall so i didnt see it being a big deal.
anyways, 2 quick bolts up, i mess up the sequence, hit the slopers wrong and start to barn door. so as im swinging, im yelling fuck fuck fuck fuck. the rope catches and im close enough to the ground to just kinda put my feet down and stand up.
they were all stunned, having not understood why i fell so far and how i "almost died". they were scared to climb for the rest of the day
started from the ground got back on it and sent right after tho.
things didnt work with her, but i brought another girl out there a few weeks later (no whippers this time). we ended up making out in my hammock. we been together 6 months now
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hansundfritz
Feb 13, 2009, 4:04 PM
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My old gf used to cry almost every time we did big, multi-pitch stuff. But then she'd cry "weak-sauce" (as it were) when we got back on the ground: "That wasn't too hard. You should be taking me up harder stuff than that. Let's try (insert 5.hard X route here) next time." Yeah right. At TR crags, on the other hand, we used to get quite busy with the "Big Gear."
It was my fault, I bought her the shoes and harness after all.
My wife does not climb -- and I'm perfectly happy with that.
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kachoong
Feb 13, 2009, 4:20 PM
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Proposing on a climb was the best "date" climb for me... it worked out well for her coz, while on belay, she said yes...
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adatesman
Feb 13, 2009, 4:27 PM
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This post contains nudity or adult content. To protect the innocent we require that you register and turn off your Adult Content Filter to read it.
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cush
Feb 13, 2009, 4:32 PM
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i've never dated a climber (let's face it, i haven't been on a date since the 10th grade) but one of the cutest/funniest stories i can remember happened between a couple friends of my parents.
rob, the guy who would eventually go on about 15 years later to teach me to climb, was belaying his current girlfriend up the second pitch of some route in the gunks. when she was about 50 feet up the line he yelled up asking her if she wanted to marry him.....and then jokingly reminded her that if she refused that it wouldn't be a good idea to fall before the next belay station.
they've been married 25+ years.
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wonderwoman
Feb 13, 2009, 4:37 PM
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cush wrote: rob, the guy who would eventually go on about 15 years later to teach me to climb, was belaying his current girlfriend up the second pitch of some route in the gunks. when she was about 50 feet up the line he yelled up asking her if she wanted to marry him.....and then jokingly reminded her that if she refused that it wouldn't be a good idea to fall before the next belay station. they've been married 25+ years.
That is a very sweet story!
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blueeyedclimber
Feb 13, 2009, 4:46 PM
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wonderwoman wrote: petsfed wrote: So, without further ado, what are your best, and worst, experiences blending your romantic life with your climbing life? Finding that special secluded place to combine climbing with other activities  .... Flashing your partner when they make it to the belay station... You know, usual stuff! 
Is there really anybody out there that's luckier than me?
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krusher4
Feb 13, 2009, 5:19 PM
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thanks for finding and posting that link adatesmen, yeah that's funny for sure!
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fjclimbsrocks
Feb 13, 2009, 5:53 PM
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This thread made me think of Shockley's Ceiling at the Gunks. I have heard people call it Shockley's Divorcer due to the following female getting stuck in midair underneath the ceiling. Definitely not a "first date" climb. I practically made my girlfriend sign a waiver before we climbed it. No worries though, she hiked it
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gogounou
Feb 13, 2009, 6:04 PM
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blueeyedclimber wrote: wonderwoman wrote: petsfed wrote: So, without further ado, what are your best, and worst, experiences blending your romantic life with your climbing life? Finding that special secluded place to combine climbing with other activities .... Flashing your partner when they make it to the belay station... You know, usual stuff! Is there really anybody out there that's luckier than me?
Ya know, BEC? I was kinda thinking the same thing. Cheers to you guys.
J
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petsfed
Feb 13, 2009, 6:34 PM
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fitzontherocks wrote: I assume you mean on the chick, not the OW.
Have you ever had a belayer burst into tears? Its really distracting. I ended up walking to the top so I could at least top rope the thing. Unfortunately, I haven't gone back to lead it since. As soon as the snow melts off it, I'll be back.
I bailed on her about 3 days later. Which looked a little suspicious, considering the sequence of events that followed, but that's a whole other story.
(This post was edited by petsfed on Feb 13, 2009, 6:37 PM)
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fresh
Feb 13, 2009, 6:38 PM
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me and my gf's first multipitch climb together (her first overall) was the slab classic standard route on whitehorse ledge. let's see.. storms predicted, rained the night before, my first time leading slab, left the tag line behind, dropped the nut tool, dropped an ATC, not enough water, 85 degree weather, routefinding troubles, 9 pitches, I led every pitch, she cried, I cried, it was a good day. she's a trooper!
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wonderwoman
Feb 13, 2009, 6:54 PM
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fresh wrote: me and my gf's first multipitch climb together (her first overall) was the slab classic standard route on whitehorse ledge. let's see.. storms predicted, rained the night before, my first time leading slab, left the tag line behind, dropped the nut tool, dropped an ATC, not enough water, 85 degree weather, routefinding troubles, 9 pitches, I led every pitch, she cried, I cried, it was a good day. she's a trooper!
Our first multipitch too! They sky opened up and it poured when we were beyond all rap stations... I cried!
(This post was edited by wonderwoman on Feb 13, 2009, 6:54 PM)
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cracklover
Feb 13, 2009, 6:56 PM
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camhead wrote: angry wrote: petsfed wrote: I wondered, while belaying my girlfriend on the southwest dihedral on the Whale's Tail in Eldo, what other people's experiences with climbing while dating. So, without further ado, what are your best, and worst, experiences blending your romantic life with your climbing life? Currently I'm dating a girl who climbs and I'm very happy about it. Hands down, the absolute worst person I've ever dated, one of the worst I've ever met, was also a climber. As much as it is climbing, it isn't about climbing. I dated a girl for a couple years who climbed, but with much different objectives than me. We did ALL the date climbs. Nutcracker, Bastile Crack, North Chimney of Castleton, everything. I would lead all pitches. It got old. When we started dating, she was just breaking into .11 sport, but had serious lead head issues and actually regressed quite a bit during the time we were together. By the end of the whole thing, we spent two weeks in Mexico and barely even climbed with each other, ad it was awesome. But, for the most part, I fit EVERYTHING I wanted to climb around her, and it sucked. I shot up nearly a number grade after we splitzed. With my now-wife, I am not sure that we have ever had a "date climb." We have very similar objectives, and it is merely going out cragging with our own projects. And it has always been like this. Fuck *date* climbs. Just climbing with your significant other is way better. That is awl.
^^^ is good post. But when your SO doesn't climb as hard as you, there's just no avoiding the above dynamic completely. And if the relationship is worth it, you just have to deal.
The only saving grace, I think, is if both people can recognize the need to get out (and let the other person get out) and climb with partners of their own ability. Mix it up a little. At least that's the best I've come up with.
GO
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kachoong
Feb 13, 2009, 7:03 PM
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cracklover wrote: camhead wrote: angry wrote: petsfed wrote: I wondered, while belaying my girlfriend on the southwest dihedral on the Whale's Tail in Eldo, what other people's experiences with climbing while dating. So, without further ado, what are your best, and worst, experiences blending your romantic life with your climbing life? Currently I'm dating a girl who climbs and I'm very happy about it. Hands down, the absolute worst person I've ever dated, one of the worst I've ever met, was also a climber. As much as it is climbing, it isn't about climbing. I dated a girl for a couple years who climbed, but with much different objectives than me. We did ALL the date climbs. Nutcracker, Bastile Crack, North Chimney of Castleton, everything. I would lead all pitches. It got old. When we started dating, she was just breaking into .11 sport, but had serious lead head issues and actually regressed quite a bit during the time we were together. By the end of the whole thing, we spent two weeks in Mexico and barely even climbed with each other, ad it was awesome. But, for the most part, I fit EVERYTHING I wanted to climb around her, and it sucked. I shot up nearly a number grade after we splitzed. With my now-wife, I am not sure that we have ever had a "date climb." We have very similar objectives, and it is merely going out cragging with our own projects. And it has always been like this. Fuck *date* climbs. Just climbing with your significant other is way better. That is awl. ^^^ is good post. But when your SO doesn't climb as hard as you, there's just no avoiding the above dynamic completely. And if the relationship is worth it, you just have to deal. The only saving grace, I think, is if both people can recognize the need to get out (and let the other person get out) and climb with partners of their own ability. Mix it up a little. At least that's the best I've come up with. GO
Good points and I reckon with most climbing couples it's true that one climbs harder than the other. The way my wife and I deal with it is that she is always more than willing to belay me on harder stuff, if it's single pitch. Mostly though it's just getting out there away from the "world" that's the main objective and I'm always happy to climb lower grade stuff or at her limit.
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cracklover
Feb 13, 2009, 7:04 PM
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wonderwoman wrote: fresh wrote: me and my gf's first multipitch climb together (her first overall) was the slab classic standard route on whitehorse ledge. let's see.. storms predicted, rained the night before, my first time leading slab, left the tag line behind, dropped the nut tool, dropped an ATC, not enough water, 85 degree weather, routefinding troubles, 9 pitches, I led every pitch, she cried, I cried, it was a good day. she's a trooper! Our first multipitch too! They sky opened up and it poured when we were beyond all rap stations... I cried!
Weird story - the first time Allison (my fiancee and primary climbing partner) was going to do a multi-pitch with me, was before we were dating. I was still dating my ex at the time. Due to a communication screwup, Allison drove three hours, got to the base of the route, to find me and my then gf two pitches up that same multi-pitch slab route in NH.
My then gf and I had already decided to break up at that time. And she wasn't even a climber. She just wanted to try it one time before we split up!
Despite having to just go ahead and drive the three hours home, Allison never got mad, and a year or two later we started dating. Now that's a keeper!
GO
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wonderwoman
Feb 13, 2009, 7:17 PM
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cracklover wrote: Now that's a keeper!
Yup, she is! And we just got your 'save the date' card! We'll try to make it out and congrats on picking a date!
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fresh
Feb 13, 2009, 7:32 PM
Post #44 of 83
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wonderwoman wrote: fresh wrote: me and my gf's first multipitch climb together (her first overall) was the slab classic standard route on whitehorse ledge. let's see.. storms predicted, rained the night before, my first time leading slab, left the tag line behind, dropped the nut tool, dropped an ATC, not enough water, 85 degree weather, routefinding troubles, 9 pitches, I led every pitch, she cried, I cried, it was a good day. she's a trooper! Our first multipitch too! They sky opened up and it poured when we were beyond all rap stations... I cried!
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fitzontherocks
Feb 13, 2009, 7:39 PM
Post #45 of 83
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petsfed wrote: Have you ever had a belayer burst into tears? .
Only because of my horrendous style.
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kennoyce
Feb 13, 2009, 7:46 PM
Post #46 of 83
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In reply to: Is there really anybody out there that's luckier than me?
Not quite sure, there may be, or there may not be, you tell us after watching the clucking video posted by adatesman.
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sungam
Feb 13, 2009, 8:21 PM
Post #47 of 83
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krusher4 wrote: did anyone see the "Clucking" post on mountainproject a few weeks back? 67 (thanks A) clucking posts on rc.com.
Petsfed, we have time. Do tell.
Well, as for "climbing dates" when we were just starting to hang our alot my gf said she'd love3 to try climbing. I thought this was awesome, but it never happened. Maybe I'll at least teach her to belay?
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petsfed
Feb 13, 2009, 9:55 PM
Post #48 of 83
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Its a really long story, and I haven't had the time to type it out.
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sungam
Feb 13, 2009, 10:20 PM
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petsfed wrote: Its a really long story, and I haven't had the time to type it out.
Some time, though.
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angry
Feb 13, 2009, 10:34 PM
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sungam wrote: petsfed wrote: Its a really long story, and I haven't had the time to type it out. Fair enough. Some time, though.
I've got a few.
Early on, my HS GF. She was an OK climber, usually able to follow anything I led. I got up a really thing 5.10 corner (hard for me at the time) and even though she followed it cleanly, she whimpered about the whole time. I finally snapped at her that you're only allowed to scream if you need a rescue.
Later that day while walking out in the dark, we missed the trail I didn't want to ford the beaver ponds. I knew that between us and the highway, which I could see, was the road that led directly to where we parked. It was a bit further than I'd hoped and it was a pain in the ass bushwhack. I got bitched at every moment of that walk. The whole day sucked.
Other shitty situations.
I took a girl over to "The Center Route" on the Cynical Pinnacle. She told me that she loved 5.9 trad and loved crack climbing. I led the first pitch of 5.8 and it took her half the day to follow. We bailed and I never called her back.
On the ridge traverse final bit of the 1st flatiron, I had a girl totally freeze up. I was able to build an anchor and lower her to the ground. I soloed to the rap anchors and met her a minute later. It wasn't a big deal.
A friend of mine in college tried to set me up with this girl. We went out and had fun and planned to climb a day later. She bailed because of a hangover, I was left without a partner, and I never called her back. In retrospect, I probably shouldn't take such a hard stance on stuff like that. I'm pretty mellow but I feel that partners need a pretty good reason to bail.
Those are just off the top of my head, there's others, but I'll just leave them. Maybe edl will post up about the time he got stranded at Vedauwoo.
(This post was edited by angry on Feb 13, 2009, 10:35 PM)
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altelis
Feb 13, 2009, 11:30 PM
Post #51 of 83
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I HATE partners that bail due to hangovers. ESP if we've had plans for a while. YOU KNEW YOU HAD COMMITTED. boot an rally. drink some coffee. SUCK IT UP.
but i agree. it royally pisses me off to have a partner bail due to a hangover. the only thing worst is when i woke up an hour early because i knew i would be hung over and needed extra time to caffeine and greasy-egg it up.
my favorite date climb? well, that would be pentapitch. not because of the climb but because of the big ledge before the final two pitches, and the "fun activities" that was had. we watched the sun set over the mountains, decided we knew the decent, rap, and hike out well enough to do it in the "dark" thanks to the full moon. it was our "favorite" climb, the one where i broke my gf's "multipitch cherry". she loved that climb too.....so we decided to take advantage of the situation....
she's my fiance now...
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A-Bowl
Feb 13, 2009, 11:51 PM
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Wow.... heres a fun one.
Was living in Yosemite and an ex-girlfriend moved out from Arkansas to join me. She didn't quite like the title "Ex" but was dealing with it. I at the moment was living in Never Never Land and there were too many beautiful girls to be tied down. She hadn't been climbing in a while and I invited her to go hit Nutcracker, classic 6 pitch 5.8. I take off and link the first 3 pitches by doing a direct line (quite a ropestretcher with a 70 m). The direct upped the grade a bit which at the time wasn't going through my mind. To add to this i was too far out to see or communicate with her. I just anchor and start pulling her up after a good many minutes of her not knowing whether she's on belay. She for some reason can't even make it up the first part, a thin 5.9 leaning crack.... i had known her to climb 5.10s many times in the past. It takes me again as long to realize this and start to lower her back down. I can tell she is finally off by the limp rope and so now I have to go about a hairy three pitch rap with pendulums to retrieve all of my gear from the leaning 230' crack. Fun. Then I get down to her crying. We aren't together so I dont give her a hard time about it and just pack up. On the short car ride back down the valley she breaks down and tells me shes sorry and just sexually frustrated... like that explains the poor climbing performance... not having sex. Well i tell her i can fix it right away and she smiles... i hit the brakes and we book it down the bank of the river and make love on a sandbar in broad day-light under El Capitan and in the middle of the Merced. Very fun and romantic until a family of Tourists walks up on us... with her in the middle of love screams but in the air. It didn't fix our relationship but was a good memory for both of us. Damn I miss the Valley.
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petsfed
Feb 14, 2009, 1:38 AM
Post #53 of 83
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angry wrote: Those are just off the top of my head, there's others, but I'll just leave them. Maybe edl will post up about the time he got stranded at Vedauwoo.
Because of a woman, or because of a flat tire? Because I was there for the flat tire.
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ladyscarlett
Feb 14, 2009, 1:45 AM
Post #54 of 83
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Question to all who have done the 'date' climb...
ever do a 'friend' climb BEFORE the 'date' climb?
I mean it sounds like in situations where it all went to hell because she couldn't meet your expectations at a hot girl climber, or she couldn't meet hers, maybe a 'friend' climb could have prevented it?
Perhaps I'm just naive
remind me not to go on 'date' climbs with all you guys who can't deal with under the breath whimpers over cruxes - a personal version of swearing and groaning like all you guys do...
ls
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angry
Feb 14, 2009, 2:02 AM
Post #55 of 83
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ladyscarlett wrote: Question to all who have done the 'date' climb... ever do a 'friend' climb BEFORE the 'date' climb? I mean it sounds like in situations where it all went to hell because she couldn't meet your expectations at a hot girl climber, or she couldn't meet hers, maybe a 'friend' climb could have prevented it? Perhaps I'm just naive remind me not to go on 'date' climbs with all you guys who can't deal with under the breath whimpers over cruxes - a personal version of swearing and groaning like all you guys do... ls
I think you're reading what you want to. Not one of these stories has an "under the breath" whimper.
Half these situations that went to hell are because she portrayed herself to be something more than she was. One of those situations that went to hell ended in fornication in the Merced.
You're trying too hard to look at it from a "the guy ruined it" perspective.
Seriously, happiness is a choice, it's not our fault that can't enjoy a little failure with your success.
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wonderwoman
Feb 14, 2009, 2:08 AM
Post #56 of 83
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angry wrote: Half these situations that went to hell are because she portrayed herself to be something more than she was. One of those situations that went to hell ended in fornication in the Merced.
Ahh... If only all of these types of climbing portrayals (male and female) ended in epic sex stories instead of just epics!
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petsfed
Feb 14, 2009, 3:05 AM
Post #58 of 83
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ladyscarlett wrote: Question to all who have done the 'date' climb... ever do a 'friend' climb BEFORE the 'date' climb? I mean it sounds like in situations where it all went to hell because she couldn't meet your expectations at a hot girl climber, or she couldn't meet hers, maybe a 'friend' climb could have prevented it? Perhaps I'm just naive remind me not to go on 'date' climbs with all you guys who can't deal with under the breath whimpers over cruxes - a personal version of swearing and groaning like all you guys do... ls
I don't typically date people before I climb with them. I've done so twice. Once, with a girl who was already motivated to climb (she ended up climbing with me a ton after we split, and still climbs to this day) and once with a girl who clearly went to the gym to be closer to me (more on that one later). She and I eventually had a fight after which she never climbed again. No skin off my back there. Otherwise, there's always been a friends-first sort of arrangement that eventually went elsewhere.
So, for the long story. First, this is mostly not related to climbing. Mostly. It shows up from time to time, but is hardly central.
Second, some background: beginning in February of 2005 and continuing well into 2006 and a little into 2007, I dated this girl, lets call her "A". Now, A and I were nothing alike, she was very feminine, delicate, needy, and a real homebody without any real hobbies. She was also very attractive. She had no real interest in climbing, although I did meet her after a climbing competition. The relationship went on a long time longer than it probably should've owing mostly to the fact that she put out, early and often. It took me until about mid 2006 to sort my dick out from my brain, and another 8 or 9 months to finally walk away. This girl was not good for me at all. Clinical depressive, way co-dependent, daddy issues, the works. She didn't need a boyfriend, she needed a therapist. She, incidentally, started getting therapy after she and I split.
When she and I finally split, she immediately sought out other company, including this guy who was apparently just like her. I thought he was a tool (having met him while she and I were still dating) but that might've been my spidey sense tingling. I, meanwhile, did my best to avoid A and women in general. A, because I tended to let my brain get pushed into the passenger seat, and women because I'd actually stopped climbing for a while due to this girl. I actually had an agreement of non-communication with A, which was nice.
So fall of 2007 rolls around, and the new arrivals show up. Including the freshman. I'm 23 at this point, just for perspective. My roommates and I had taken to setting up a slackline on campus, partially to meet people (that is, women) and partially because the weather was good and we didn't have enough time to go all the way up to Vedauwoo and make it worthwhile. So I met all kinds of people (including a girl I dated later, but that's another story too, also mostly unrelated to climbing). One girl I met, lets call her "G", immediately took an interest, but not necessarily a romantic one. She and I climbed together once (on a primo date climb called "Walt's Wall") and did some mountain biking. Then I asked her out, then one thing led to another, and then she's crying at the base of Lower Slot Right.
This is about where we came in right?
So that weekend, I volunteer for the Horsetooth Hang. I was supposed to link up with my brother at Rotary Park to buy his old mountain bike, but we didn't link up, so I had to go down to Denver the next day. In the middle of the night, when I'm mostly asleep, I get a text message that says "its times like these that I miss you". Now, G was out of town that night, so I just assumed that it was her, rolled over, and went back to sleep. The next morning, without even looking, I send a reply to the effect of "why's that?". Now, I was already looking for a way out with G, so damage control is kind of necessary when you get a message like that.
As I'm driving down to Denver, I get a message from A. WTF. I'm afraid to reply. But her message makes some reference to us communicating recently. Which I don't recall. So I check the logs. Sure enough, it was A, not G, that sent the message the night before. And I, like an idiot, replied. Radio silence gone. Whatever. So she and I get to talking again. Real tentative like. Nothing fancy. She'd heard through the grapevine about G, and gave me shit about dating a girl 5 years younger than me. But nothing really comes of it. I pick up the bike, and return to Laramie.
I dump G on Tuesday, a process that involved a lot of crying on her part. I feel like a prick over the whole thing, but I'm not about to stay with her just to keep her happy. I've done that before. And lets face it, G's mental state was shakier than a 3-legged caribou on Demerol. So I walked away.
Then (lord only knows why, in retrospect) I go to hangout out with A thursday night. And she tells me that her dude (the douchebag mentioned earlier) was way jealous, and wouldn't take kindly to me hanging out with her. She feels stifled, and kind of misses me. Its awkward (not the least of which because my brain is engaged in combat with my dick for control of my actions), and we part ways.
Friday at the slackline, everybody is becoming aware of G and I splitting, which is awkward, because G is still there.
Then A shows up.
In tears.
Being the softy that I am, I go over to find out why, and she relates how she just found out that her dude has been cheating on her since day one. Her world is shattered. Blah blah blah. I go all supportive, and eventually she comes and hangs out with my roommates and I, partly because its a safe place for her mentally. She crashed there that night, but she and I don't sleep together, thankfully. She gets her ship righted again, and we continue hanging out together.
So, now for the funny part.
A few weeks after that particular saga, I get to flirting with some girl and get her number, and my friend Rob asks, after the girl leaves "What will your girlfriend think of that?"
Wha?
"You know, A?"
No no no no NO. I explain to him what actually happened. His roommate, G's new boyfriend, had explained things somewhat differently. Apparently, the belief was that I had dumped G so I could get back with A, and not because I couldn't deal with G bursting into tears at the drop of a hat (or the fact that she was 18 years old, I felt like a dirty old man).
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sungam
Feb 14, 2009, 3:14 AM
Post #59 of 83
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That is a great epic story, I have one kinda similar but it's shorter, not really funny in the least, and makes me out to be the total douchebag I was being.
That one, however, was pretty good.
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petsfed
Feb 14, 2009, 5:55 AM
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5 pounds of internet to the first person (other than clausti, who has heard this story) who can guess who A is married to now.
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sungam
Feb 14, 2009, 7:08 AM
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petsfed wrote: 5 pounds of internet to the first person (other than clausti, who has heard this story) who can guess who A is married to now.
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shockabuku
Feb 14, 2009, 7:45 AM
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cracklover wrote: fjclimbsrocks wrote: This thread made me think of Shockley's Ceiling at the Gunks. I have heard people call it Shockley's Divorcer due to the following female getting stuck in midair underneath the ceiling. Definitely not a "first date" climb. I practically made my girlfriend sign a waiver before we climbed it. No worries though, she hiked it Shockley's is a good one, but nothing beats Bonnies Roof for total and complete Chernobyl style couples meltdowns. GO
Not even Modern Times?
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devkrev
Feb 14, 2009, 11:28 AM
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I taught my girlfriend how to climb, pretty much putting my climbing goals on hold all the while, then she dumped me. But I guess she's gonna keep climbing. So I must've done something right, or not, I dunno.
dev
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fitzontherocks
Feb 14, 2009, 3:52 PM
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petsfed wrote: She, incidentally, started getting therapy after she and I split.
I'm not reading anything into this. At all.
And Happy Valentine's Day lovers and climbers everywhere.
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asiaclimber
Feb 14, 2009, 4:09 PM
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last girl friend first date, 9 days travel around korea climbing in 6 different crags lived out of a tent ate crazy korean food and drank soju. best date i ever had in my life. Longest date i ever had in my life. Longest date i have ever known any one to have.
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camhead
Feb 14, 2009, 4:19 PM
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sungam wrote: petsfed wrote: 5 pounds of internet to the first person (other than clausti, who has heard this story) who can guess who A is married to now. Camhead? *runz*
Five pounds of internet to Haggisdonny!
Oh wait, no, I meant five pounds of *SHOOTS TO THE FACE!*
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adelicious
Feb 14, 2009, 5:10 PM
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Today's the first day I've checked RC in ages and this is what I stumble upon???
Well, I think I have a good story. I met my husband through climbing. Actually he stalked me on RC.com for a while before I thought anything of his continous messages. In the beginning we used to travel and meet up at climbing places a lot - although I never thought of any of them as "dates" - we'd just meet up and hang out! We started a long distance relationship eventually and last year between Christmas 2007 & New Years when I was visiting him, he took me to a place that's pretty special to him (he has done a lot of bolting there). He lead me to some crazy place (I was mad at him for not thinking of my ankle which I had broken earlier that year) and on the top of the cliff he got down on one knee and proposed!! Well of course I said yes!! Our honeymoon was a 2 month climbing trip to Chaminox, Mallorca and then Kalymnos.
Worst was years earlier with a guy that I'm pretty sure THOUGHT we were on a date! We were on the side of a cliff near the water and it's all hanging belays (I was at the top and belaying him up). It had started raining across the water on the other side of the bay and we could see some
lightning but he had plenty of time to finish the climb. Well he started panicking and tried to improvise a way to get up faster but he forgot all his knots and how to use his acender - it was bad. It may have been funny except I was belaying! He wouldn't calm down and listen to me and in his panic he ended up dropping my ATC and some biners down the cliff. Had he kept climbing he would have made it off the cliff just before the rain came, but we ended up getting soaked! I didn't ever climb with him again after that!
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wyoclimb
Feb 14, 2009, 10:46 PM
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I never take a girl on multi- pitch climb on a first date just a little 2 much i think . single pitch super just something I have learned.
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uhoh
Feb 14, 2009, 11:24 PM
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petsfed wrote: 5 pounds of internet to the first person (other than clausti, who has heard this story) who can guess who A is married to now.
G! She's married to G! Bowchickawowow!
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irregularpanda
Feb 15, 2009, 1:57 AM
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Best-
-Summiting Mt. Stuart after climbing the north ridge. Just before the sun set. Froze my left nut while snuggling all night. No sleeping bags makes for better alpine style (apparently).
-Also summitting North early winters spire twice on two different weekends, by two different routes.
-Outer space was pretty sweet.
-She tends to catch all my big falls, that kinda rocks.
Worst-
-Her freaking out on every traverse, ever. Scares the shit out of her, but it sure doesn't make it any easier to be a follower on a traverse.
-Also descending cathedral peak after the sun set, without headlamps.
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Hennessey
Feb 15, 2009, 4:09 AM
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Never got the chance to do the climber dating scene type thing. I'm married to my climbing partner, so I always have a belayer.
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petsfed
Feb 15, 2009, 8:30 AM
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fitzontherocks wrote: petsfed wrote: She, incidentally, started getting therapy after she and I split. I'm not reading anything into this. At all. And Happy Valentine's Day lovers and climbers everywhere.
I forgot to mention that I subtly and unsubtly suggested that she needed to go back on therapy (she had stopped both her medications and her visits with a therapist some months before I met her) during the final months of the relationship. She'd spent some time in an institution. I'm not being cruel, or sidestepping the notion that I caused it by celebrating the fact that she finally got therapy after I broke up with her. Her consistent decision to choose leaning on me as opposed to contacting someone qualified and prepared to offer the help she needed was the primary reason I walked away. I told her, point blanke, that I could not provide the emotional stability that she so desperately needed because it was destroying my life and my emotional stability. And she continued to lean exclusively on me. So I walked away. I feel justified.
I know your comment was in jest, but I'm dead serious. There is no doubt in my mind that a leading reason why I am STILL in college, 7 years after I started, with ZERO changes in major, is because I chose to put out fires with A, rather than focus on my studies.
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philbox
Moderator
Feb 16, 2009, 11:01 PM
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blueeyedclimber wrote: wonderwoman wrote: petsfed wrote: So, without further ado, what are your best, and worst, experiences blending your romantic life with your climbing life? Finding that special secluded place to combine climbing with other activities .... Flashing your partner when they make it to the belay station... You know, usual stuff! Is there really anybody out there that's luckier than me?
Bastard.
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clausti
Feb 16, 2009, 11:15 PM
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petsfed wrote: So, without further ado, what are your best, and worst, experiences blending your romantic life with your climbing life?
in all fairness, to actually contribute to this thread:
my worst "date" climb ever was when camhead thought that it'd be a good idea for my very first desert tower evar to be castleton. but not the normal way, no. the hardest route on the tower.
and ok, to start off with, the approach is a death march. and then, the tower about as wide as a fucking table. he led the first pitch, a charming .11+ in sort-of a corner. fine. except there is a horizontal crack that runs right at like, head-level for the belayer, and i could hear every fucking cam go in. omg-it's hollow. it sounded like half the tower was going to up and fall off.
then, since i was seconding, i had the camelbak- the only water we were carrying, having stashed the rest at the base, and reasonably concluding that it's 2 real pitches and 2 short pitches, it'd be fine. except the mouthpiece came off of the camelbak. popped right the fuck off, spraying water *everywhere* including into the crack i'm trying to climb. so i do the only thing i can do, i stick the end of the camelbak in my mouth and try and try and keep in as much water as i can, since every time i move, the pressure in the bladder changes and the water tries to come out. this is going so well.
but i didn't fall on the first pitch. nope, got up it. even the wacky traverse at the end that had no gear in it. but sitting on the belay ledge, contemplating the rising temperatures and the water crisis, looking at the *CALCITE COVERED NIGHTMARE* that was the pitch I was supposed to lead, i cried. seriously, the entire pitch was covered in at least half and inch of what amounts to mother-of-pearl in texture and appearance. it's like the side of the tower is frosted. so i lose my shit. it doesn't help that the width, or lack thereof, of the tower, on top of the fact that the base is already quite high on a ridge, is doing weird things to my perception of balance and depth.
i really really didn't want to come down, not after having hiked all the damn way up there. but i just couldn't do it. i was exhausted after no-warm-up brownypointing close to the hardest pure crack climb i'd ever been on, and there were three pitches left. and the calcite terrified me. i didn't trust the gear, the tower was hollow, and we bailed.
it was a really sucky morning.
in camhead's defense, i really wanted to climb the tower, and i told him i hated chimneys.
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Valarc
Feb 16, 2009, 11:44 PM
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My fiance and I started climbing together after she moved in with me, and it had nothing to do with being drawn to the outdoors or the notion of climbing or adrenaline rushes or any such nonsense.
We had decided to go to the gym together for generic workouts. We got bored with all the typical gym shit, and decided to try out the crappy college climbin wall for a change. I got hooked immediately, and quickly made the transition to outdoors climbing, and haven't looked back.
Not a very exciting story, but if it wasn't for that awesome girl, I would never have tried climbing, and my forearms and fingertips wouldn't be burning while I type this. I would also probably be about 30 pounds heavier 
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camhead
Feb 16, 2009, 11:45 PM
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ok, I'll chime in with my version of the date climb that I took clausti on.
It was August in the desert, and I figured that, since we had never done a tower route together we should do one. Most people do Kor Ingles for their first route up Castleton (too hot in the sun) or the North Chimney (which only has one really good pitch and a bunch of forgettable choss).
So, I suggested that we check out this route called Sacred Ground; it is the first two pitches of the North Face, which I had done before, with an alternate 12b face climbing finish, which I had redpointed previously, but never put the entire climb together.
The first pitch, which is not that scary by desert tower standards kind of shook clausti up, it was big #3 camalots, so it was offwidth for her, it was getting hot (over 100 degrees that day), she knew that there was very hard climbing coming up, and the camelbak malfunction just sort of capped off the whole thing. We bailed. I still have not sent Sacred Ground from the ground up, unfortunately.
To this day, I do not think that we have done more than a two pitch climb together, although we have done well over a hundreds pitches and are each other's main partner. Someday we'll have to go back and finish it in better style, I suppose!
And for what it's worth, clausti is an excellent climbing partner, and that was the only "date climb" meltdown that we've had; she's followed me up plenty of stuff, has put up plenty of topropes for me, and both of us climb at about the same level.
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cracklover
Feb 17, 2009, 3:13 PM
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shockabuku wrote: cracklover wrote: fjclimbsrocks wrote: This thread made me think of Shockley's Ceiling at the Gunks. I have heard people call it Shockley's Divorcer due to the following female getting stuck in midair underneath the ceiling. Definitely not a "first date" climb. I practically made my girlfriend sign a waiver before we climbed it. No worries though, she hiked it Shockley's is a good one, but nothing beats Bonnies Roof for total and complete Chernobyl style couples meltdowns. GO Not even Modern Times?
D'oh! Modern Times is what I meant to say. Thank you for knowing what I meant, not what I said!
Sheesh, I guess I've been away from the Gunks for too long.
GO
(edited typo)
(This post was edited by cracklover on Feb 17, 2009, 3:22 PM)
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ladyscarlett
Feb 17, 2009, 8:52 PM
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angry wrote: I think you're reading what you want to. Not one of these stories has an "under the breath" whimper. Half these situations that went to hell are because she portrayed herself to be something more than she was. One of those situations that went to hell ended in fornication in the Merced. You're trying too hard to look at it from a "the guy ruined it" perspective. Seriously, happiness is a choice, it's not our fault that can't enjoy a little failure with your success.
sorry to keep this going, but I just had to respond.
I viewed as all the ones that ended badly involved differing expectations from both sides - male and female, actually wasn't looking at "the guy ruined it perspective" Plus, the Merced story (Awesome!! btw) showed me that this doesn't necessarily end badly! If only all similar situations ended so well!
And you're right, happiness can be a choice - just not everyone knows it yet....I'll work on not giving the guy the hard time - that's his role!
ls
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boadman
Feb 17, 2009, 10:10 PM
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I got my first .75 and number one cams along with several nuts, and trad draws by following a meltdown on Bonnies.
Her - "sob sob sob, I just can't do it"
Him - "Try harder!"
Her - "Fine! unclip, unclip, unclip"
They weren't waiting at the top when I got there...
cracklover wrote: fjclimbsrocks wrote: This thread made me think of Shockley's Ceiling at the Gunks. I have heard people call it Shockley's Divorcer due to the following female getting stuck in midair underneath the ceiling. Definitely not a "first date" climb. I practically made my girlfriend sign a waiver before we climbed it. No worries though, she hiked it Shockley's is a good one, but nothing beats Bonnies Roof for total and complete Chernobyl style couples meltdowns. GO |
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shimanilami
Feb 17, 2009, 10:44 PM
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Worst: girlfriend flies to Peru to "retrieve" me from an extended climbing trip. "If you don't come home within the next 2 weeks, we're history," she said. "And 'no', I do not want climb Ranrapalca with you."
Best: a few months later, she marries me on Royal Arches route.
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boymeetsrock
Feb 18, 2009, 6:38 PM
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OK Here is my worst.
Chapel Pond Slab, NY. Nice easy (5.2-.3) slab climbing, beautiful views.
My girlfriend was (and still is) not a climber. Also, she hates to rappel. Hell she hates just sitting in the rope. She is a tough cookie though. So I suggested the route.
Se we show up, and she is cool. We start up the 600' slab and all goes well. The only hitch was a stuck nut that she refused to leave behind (bless her heart). The climbing is all very easy and there is only one very short vertical section. We make fine time and arrive at the top just in time to watch the sun set. Beautiful, and planned.
In my infinite wisdom, I ASSUMED there would be a walk off. This was wrong.
I tried to walk us down climbers left and found us quickly atop an 80' + slab astride a tine ledge of pine needles. So we reversed our track.
Back over the top we went to try a descent on the other side of the cliff. We then spent the next couple of hours negotiating small ledges and a steep drainage. Headlamps were failing fast (read dead). We had no idea how far we had to go. It was dark.
Alas, we started to see cars passing on the road below. A short time later we were back at the car.
It was epic, no doubt. But she didn't kill me for it, or even dump me. It was a true bonding experience. And now she knows better than to follow me into the woods. 
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jrathfon
Feb 18, 2009, 7:02 PM
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cracklover wrote: shockabuku wrote: cracklover wrote: fjclimbsrocks wrote: This thread made me think of Shockley's Ceiling at the Gunks. I have heard people call it Shockley's Divorcer due to the following female getting stuck in midair underneath the ceiling. Definitely not a "first date" climb. I practically made my girlfriend sign a waiver before we climbed it. No worries though, she hiked it Shockley's is a good one, but nothing beats Bonnies Roof for total and complete Chernobyl style couples meltdowns. GO Not even Modern Times? D'oh! Modern Times is what I meant to say. Thank you for knowing what I meant, not what I said! Sheesh, I guess I've been away from the Gunks for too long. GO (edited typo)
Haha! Awesome! I've been there, my gf was too scared to pull the moves, so she decided to jump off the route, thinking it was the easier option...
I was trying to squeeze this one in at the end of the day. It was breezy, the sun went down 10 minutes after she jumped, she could hear me thankfully, but I could not hear her, even after escaping the belay! Strangely, this brought us closer however as she applauded me for keeping my cool, and without feedback from her, teaching her a) how to tie bachman's and b) how to ascend for the first time, if only she listened to c) don't ascend into the next piece of gear... It also got her used to exposure much quicker than the previous 20 pitches of multi-pitch we had done! We met our friends 2 hrs late at the Guilded Otter with a good story in tow.
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