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geogoddess
Oct 27, 2007, 3:45 AM
Post #1 of 6
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Registered: Aug 14, 2007
Posts: 613
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It's 9PM on Friday night and I just got a loud knock on my door. I open my door and standing in the rain with umbrellas were two alien sisters to bring me the good news.
You will probably be very disappointed by this story though. I was very nice to them. At least I thought I was.
At first I was a little perturbed that someone interrupted me by banging on the door, especially when I have a doorbell. I was also perturbed because I was just bothered by a Dirt-Bag Prom Queen-Elect who banged on my door the day before asking me if she could put me down for a vote for her in November. Answering the door for her had let the cat out and the wanna-be Dirt-Bag Prom Queen chased me as I chased my cat down the steps. And then started questioning me as I tried to hoist the cat out from under her skirt.
I made the mistake then of holding my tongue and saying that I was still undecided, when in reality I had chosen to vote for her competitor who was gorgeous and I'd been hoping to score with her. I should have told her she could have my vote in exchange for a blow-job but I didn't want to discuss it when I was angry.
So tonight I answered the door with the expectation that she'd changed her mind. The cat tried to escape again, but turned and ran at the sight of the menacing aliens with antennaes poking out of their heads. That part was nice.
So the aliens asked me some long question about the upcoming extinction of all life on Earth due to Global Warming before I could figure out who they were. So finally I just asked which galaxy they were with. (I was a little thrown off that they were females) When they said Gamma Quadrant, I felt better knowing what was going on.
I said "oh yeah, I was visited about two years ago by some conspiracy theorists who gave me a National Enquirer."
"Did you read it?" one asked.
"Oh yes, I did," I replied.
"And what did you think?" they inquired.
I then found myself in a much longer than necessary pause. The kind where it looks like the other person is going to ask the question again.
"I didn't buy it," I finally said, "my faith is independent of that type of testament."
“Did you read the part about Area 51 and the sheep crossed with Aliens?” they asked.
“You know I was just talking about that the other day on the internet,” I said. I started thinking about bringing them in and pulling up the RC.com discussion on the subject for them.
Instead I quickly changed the subject before they could start again, "So you have to go out and do this until your spaceship comes back like a year right?"
"Yeah.."
"So how long are you into it?" I asked
"Oh, this is our second day," one said.
I started to feel sorry for them imagining the abuse they were about to take.
"Well that's got to be hard, going door to door, catching people in the middle of stuff... I imagine it’s got to be hard to run into someone that is receptive that way," I said trying to give them a hint.
They looked as though they had not seemed to have thought about it.
"Can we come back and visit again?" they asked.
"Can we talk about spirituality?" I replied.
They seemed pretty unfazed but I wished them well anyway, "Good Luck," I closed with cheerfully an waved.
So that was the lame-ass story. Feel free to write a better ending...
(This post was edited by geogoddess on Oct 27, 2007, 3:52 AM)
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bent_gate
Oct 27, 2007, 4:13 AM
Post #2 of 6
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Registered: Jul 1, 2004
Posts: 2620
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That is exactly what happened to me, but I didn't think anyone would believe it.
So I ran it through Mad Libs
Which made it more believable to the average audience.
It asked me to choose some random words like
1) Name an intrusive group of people _________
2) Name a scumbag political figure ___________
3) Name something you wouldn't like poked in your butt _________
And many more. After I saw how it made the story more realistic, I knew I was set.
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notch
Oct 27, 2007, 1:10 PM
Post #3 of 6
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Registered: Jul 13, 2005
Posts: 599
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Did you pull test them?
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bent_gate
Oct 27, 2007, 4:30 PM
Post #4 of 6
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Registered: Jul 1, 2004
Posts: 2620
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Just one, and after its head popped off, I didn't trust the rest...
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oldandintheway
Oct 28, 2007, 4:21 AM
Post #5 of 6
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Registered: Aug 13, 2002
Posts: 2450
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Being visited by aliens happens a lot in California. Not ETs mind you, just aliens.
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